For those who don't know how to drive..Buy an SUV!


Apr 23, 2000




(I would like to say now that this is not aimed at professionals who need a large off-road capable vehicle to conduct their business, unless you have leather, then this is all about you.) So lets face it. Popular culture has no deemed the "Sport Utility Vehicle" the "cool" vehicle to be driving these days, or has it? In my opinion, no. The SUV is not a cultural symbol, it is a pure basic representation of ignorance. (but nowadays americans seem to be perfect representations of pure ignorance, but we won't get in to that.)
The SUV was originally designed for use by professionals who may need to carry large items, possibly off the normal roads, with a little more security than the back of a pick up truck. The Original Jeep Cherokee did just that. And it was a respectible thing to drive if one was in the afore mentioned situation. but now...
It scares me to know just how bad the majority of drivers are these days. (lets call them "normal" drivers) How these people ever got their liscences is beyond me. I feel seperate from all the other drivers on the road because i know that i understand the physics and plain common sense of driving better than probably 85% of these people on the road. I have to stay fully alert at all times just to avoid being hit by these people. I know for a fact i have avoided well over 10 serious collisions that had i been a "normal" driver i would have been involved in. I've ridden with enough people to know this for sure. They just don't understand how to drive. So what does this have to do with SUV's you ask?? well here it is...
So Sally, the mother of two is looking for a car. She is just a "normal" driver, yet like the majority of "normal" drivers, she thinks that she is somehow a superior driver. (this being due to the fact that most people are insecure with themselves to the point that they can't admit their own flaws without feeling a sense of inadequacy to society that would leave them to realize just how pointless their own lives may be)
So she also thinks "All these other drivers are just idiots, i need to keep myself and my family safe"
So instead of seeking out better driving instruction such as a defensive driving class, she has a whole different thought process which to the best of my comprehension goes something like this; "OK, so, if everyone else on the road is a bad driver, and i need to keep my family safe, and I know that at some point I will be in a car accident in this new car, (right here is where she goes wrong, where instead of learning to avoid ever being in an accident, she knows she will, since after all, she's a bad driver...) I will have to get the safest car for being in an accident. But wait, even though this car here is the safest car you can buy, what if the other driver is driving an SUV?? The larger SUV will destroy my car and all of its occupants, (this is true, i have seen if happen right in front of me,) and that just isn't fair! So i guess i'll have to get an SUV, the biggest I can find, since bigger is better. And better means my family and I are safer from those awful awful drivers."
So now the car manufacturers realize this and they want to make Sally happy, so they all try to build the biggest SUV on the market. So now Sally has access to a vehicle the size of a small commercial truck that until now required a CDL (That's a commercial drivers license which requires a large amount of driving school both classroom and road)
So she now rides as high as a Mac truck and is a formidible oppenent in an accident with one. So do Semi truck drivers and their huge trucks scare me? no, i know they had to go to school to learn how to drive a vehicle of that size, and therefore know how to handle it at any speed in any situation.
And now, a word on the SUV's themselves...
I drive a 1991 Toyota MR2, a mid-engine rear wheel drive two seater (means the engine is in the back of the car behind the people, "yes, really Sally")
This is unarguably the most dangerous and unstable setup for a car to have in the snow.
So this winter, big snowstorm, plows can't begin to keep up, about 4 inches of snow on the ground, i have twenty miles of city driving to get home. Ask me how many 4 wheel drive SUV's i saw going sideways out of control, skidding in to the intersection, off the road, in to other cars. Actually don't ask, it was a lot though. Not to say that no cars were either, but cars aren't sold as all terrain vehicles. And despite all the sliding boxes of death carrying passengers who are undoubtably wetting themselves, trying to run me over, i was able to keep my car under complete control at all times and i actually was able to safely go faster than all the Sally's. So, the moral of the story?
Getting a bigger car will not keep you safer, learning how to drive will.
And I could now go on about how they destroy the environment with their huge gas guzzling oil consuming engines, but you've read enough.
one other note.. Why does it take american engine designers 5.7 liters of earth destroying displacement to produce the same 230 horsepower that my 2.0 liter does??
and a final note--for everyone to notice, if anyone posts a "not recommended" for this article, that person is Sally, and they don't want to come to grips with the reality of who they are. And if they do it annoymously, it means also they are too cowardous to stand up for what they believe.



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