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Barbe Schmarmy (Reply to this comment)
by AsiaBrew
I never got the whole "Barbie" thing. I had Barbies when i was a kid and I never designed myself to try and look like one. I didn't think that was even an option.
Personally if you're trying to model yourself after a piece of plastic, you have more pressing issues to deal with other than body image.
I'm sorry for your incident with menstruation, but I know guys who can deal with it much better than most, so I won't give you too much sympathy. It's nice to see the male side of a female issue come out once and a while.
AsiaBrew
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Jul 29 '02
7:29 pm PDT
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I'm guilty monkey... (Reply to this comment)
by kevlog
My daughter (now only 6) has four or five. And you know, I'm kinda fallin' for Barbie myself. Those blue eyes 'n everything. I know very well the dangers of Barbie and plan to make sure my daughter has plenty of dolls showing the full range of women and their various kinds of beauty, not all tall blonde and buxom!
Like the dolls I bartered with that Indian woman for down in Tijuana a while back. Granted, they don't swim across the tub like "olympic swimmer Barbie" (have you SEEN this thing?) but they're teaching her life ain't all bleached blonde beauty and bosoms.
OK, gotta sleep now. Drank some Russian beer this evening (contribution to the collection dontcha know) and it was way too strong.
Bye Monkey! Kevlog loves ya!
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Mar 23 '01
9:52 pm PST
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How come... (Reply to this comment)
by melllyn
a monkey can say Barbies are evil and everyone jumps on his bandwagon, but when I said it, I caught flak??? { http://www.epinions.com/kifm-review-5C71-3A147847-3A521429-prod5 }
And why the heck did epinions archive my epinion when this category exists?? Someone out there doesn't like me. I'm shocked...injured...alas, I will never reach popular status of the revered monkey! Oh well,at least you finally gave the male perspective on the barf-inducing Barbie.
Good job. Oh, and I just love Judy Blume...Her controversial Blubber was a real kicker!
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Mar 18 '01
10:52 am PST
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Re: More brunette Barbies NOW! (Reply to this comment)
by ObiWanJabroni
I caught something about them also last nite, did you see part with the woman who had been to the plastic surgeon like 17 times cuz she wanted to make herself EXACTLY like Barbie?
I can smell the OCD in the air tonite...D
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Mar 15 '01
3:50 pm PST
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Re: Product idea! (Reply to this comment)
by repulsemonkey
"My Size Barbie"? My goodness, things are worse than I thought.
("menstrual Barbie" on the other hand... now there's a money maker...)
monkey
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Mar 15 '01
2:45 pm PST
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Re: More brunette Barbies NOW! (Reply to this comment)
by repulsemonkey
Yup. Somehow sloth breeds creativity and I've hit a productive streak.
I caught the Barbie twins on TV too! They were lecturing high schoolers not to go the route they did, but the high school girls weren't havin' any of it. Strange day of coincidences...
42-19-24??? I'd figure anyone with those dimensions would fall over.
monkey
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Mar 15 '01
2:42 pm PST
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Re: Re: Yea.. (Reply to this comment)
by repulsemonkey
I assure you, you had nothing to do with Barbie's ascent to slut-dom... at least not any more than any of the rest of us.
monkey
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Mar 15 '01
2:39 pm PST
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Re: Careful... (Reply to this comment)
by repulsemonkey
You're very welcome, p-in-p. Even though you felt your comment was inarticulate, it means a lot that you took the time to write it. thanks.
monkey
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Mar 15 '01
2:37 pm PST
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Re: Hi Marty, (Reply to this comment)
by repulsemonkey
Bonnie--
sssssshhhh. be careful not to let that out, or you might blow my cover...
thanks for the kind words
monkey
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Mar 15 '01
2:34 pm PST
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Re: LMAO! (Reply to this comment)
by repulsemonkey
Funny thing was, as confused as I was by "Margaret," I read the whole darn thing, mesmerized... I think it may be time for me to pick up "Then Again, Maybe I Won't" and begin the healing process.
monkey
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Mar 15 '01
2:33 pm PST
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Re: Wonderful... (Reply to this comment)
by repulsemonkey
It's the idea-sharing that keeps me around this place too, Chris. Every once in a while, I'll come across a piece that affects me deeply. Those are the good days. Thanks for the kind words, I'll be looking out for your own beauty treatise.
monkey
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Mar 15 '01
2:30 pm PST
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Re: I Am Impressed (Reply to this comment)
by repulsemonkey
Thanks Pamela. I'm right there with ya in your Barbie-burnin'.
monkey
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Mar 15 '01
2:27 pm PST
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Product idea! (Reply to this comment)
by prfstars
I was sure you were leading into a pitch for Menstrual Barbie.
I never planned to buy my daughter Barbie dolls. It seems very weird to give a little girl a toy with exaggerated and highly sexual features. Unfortunately, girls seem to fall in love with Barbies with no encouragement from their parents. My daughter got a "My Size Barbie" for Christmas from her grandmother; it's her height, but about one-fourth her width (and my daughter is skinny). The doll gives me the creeps.
Great piece, Monkey.
Melissa
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Mar 15 '01
1:37 pm PST
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More brunette Barbies NOW! (Reply to this comment)
by nathsmom
Monkey,
I swear I just checked in her a few days ago and there was nothing new, and now, woohoo a repulsemonkey windfall. I feel like I just won the lottery!
I once read something about how if Barbie were a woman, her measurements would be something like 42-19-24, which, as you say, is impossible, except with the help of the plastic surgeon and some odd dieting practices, as in the case of the Barbie twins, who I just happened to see on tv last night. They look weird if you ask me.
Another thoughtful and insightful review, mon. Well done.
Fiona
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Mar 15 '01
7:48 am PST
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Re: Yea.. (Reply to this comment)
by SeraphofHades
You know how screwed up I was, I always put Ken and Barbie into my little Barbie Townhouse together Naked! Till my mom caught me.
I made Barbie A slut! : (
My offer still stands M, any questions I am here to teach............
J
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Mar 14 '01
7:09 pm PST
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Careful... (Reply to this comment)
by prettyinpink
You're endangering your a**hole status (per your self-chosen tag line) with this piece!
I want to comment on your excellent post, but all I can think of is stuff that's way too personal for me to post on Epinions...I mean my own painful memories and experiences. Not your fault I can't be more articulate...sorry: wish I could say something more useful.
Your piece is well written and (obviously) moving. Thanks.
ps - I'm pretty sure Barbie came out several years before GI Joe.
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Mar 14 '01
5:38 pm PST
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Hi Marty, (Reply to this comment)
by mamabear96
You are a very interesting guy. I read this review, the one you wrote about the 7 stages of grief, and your bio so far. I was very impressed. They were more interesting than anything I've read lately and I read a lot.
In your bio you said you don't know anything about women or men and little about yourself. I think you under estimate yourself. You seem to have a lot of insight and you express it amazingly well.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts with the rest of us!!
Bonnie
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Mar 14 '01
4:19 pm PST
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Yea.. (Reply to this comment)
by annexation
Boom shockalocka. Make that seven.
-Mark
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Mar 14 '01
1:11 pm PST
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LMAO! (Reply to this comment)
by fm_hunter
I, too, had that traumatic experience of reading the very same Judy Blume book when I was a young lad. Although fascinating in some inexplicable capacity, it also had some very scary information to digest, let alone comprehend. Thankfully, Blume eventually released a male comparable version of "Margart" titled, "Then Again, Maybe I Won't". As soon as I read that one, it helped to heal the scars Judy had inflicted upon me, but as you know, scars may heal, but their mark will always be there! Excellent commentary, I enjoyed reading every word!
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Mar 14 '01
1:11 pm PST
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Wonderful... (Reply to this comment)
by Chris_Maverick
This is quite brilliant, I am very impressed. It reminds me of a feminist studies type assignment I had back in college. You have so inspired me that I am thinking about writing my own essay on beauty in American society once I get off work.
I first got involved in epinions for the product reviews (especially movies) but I have since become very impressed by the idea sharing that goes on here. It is always refreshing to find someone new who presents as eloquent a discourse as you have here.
Thank you,
-Mav
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Mar 14 '01
12:37 pm PST
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I Am Impressed (Reply to this comment)
by thedragonweyr
That such wisdom should spout from the keyboard of one so young! Excellent job Marty, the Dragon commends you on your mature and sensible approach to the subject of beauty and just what it is.
I, personally, combust Barbies at each and every opportunity. Alas, because of all the plastic they do not burn with a cheery blue flame, but rather with a sullen smoky yellow one. Barbie is the antithesis of all that is womanly and desirable in the female form.
Hugs,
Pamela
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Mar 14 '01
12:36 pm PST
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Re: Gee, I Don't Know Marty-- (Reply to this comment)
by repulsemonkey
After chasing after Barbie dolls for 22 years, all I have to show for it are plastic cuts and rug burns.
monkeydoesn'tknowwhatthatmeans
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Mar 14 '01
12:22 pm PST
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Re: Monkey-man, (Reply to this comment)
by repulsemonkey
Thank you kindly, Mr. Sloucho. I take that as a great compliment coming from you.
monkey
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Mar 14 '01
12:20 pm PST
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Re: Closet Barbie Fanatic (Reply to this comment)
by repulsemonkey
This is actually more common than you might imagine...
monkey
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Mar 14 '01
12:19 pm PST
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Re: Ironic isn't it.... (Reply to this comment)
by repulsemonkey
I think Barbie was created after GI Joe came onto the market (they used to be Barbie-sized when they first came out) as the female equivalent. Now that's irony, the man goes to the army while the woman stays home and looks beautiful. If that doesn't send the wrong message to the kiddies, I don't know what does.
monkey
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Mar 14 '01
12:17 pm PST
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Yea.. (Reply to this comment)
by repulsemonkey
I really have nothing new to say, I just wanted to see six Re's in the title.
monkey
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Mar 14 '01
12:13 pm PST
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Re: Awesome! (Reply to this comment)
by repulsemonkey
I wouldn't worry about it, vania. Nobody does. I've read it's actually biologically impossible for a human being to match Barbie's figure proportionally... though it doesn't stop many from trying. Ugh.
monkey
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Mar 14 '01
12:12 pm PST
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Re: Awesome (Reply to this comment)
by repulsemonkey
Thank you kindly, flamepillar. Your enthusiasm's much appreciated.
monkey
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Mar 14 '01
12:10 pm PST
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Gee, I Don't Know Marty-- (Reply to this comment)
by 29th_Candidate
I've dated several Barbie™ Dolls; they always smell clean, look presentable and most of them come with no strings attached (talking Barbie™ excluded of course.) Nice work! You monkeys sure have thoughtful things to say about humans... .
Grinningly,
29th
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Mar 14 '01
11:19 am PST
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Monkey-man, (Reply to this comment)
by Sloucho
Using your inabiliy to understand women as a way of leaping into a discussion of the kinds of pressures society exerts to keep little girls from understanding themselves is a stroke of brilliance. Great piece, sir!
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Mar 14 '01
9:22 am PST
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