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It was difficult for me, I dreaded having to tell my son..Mar 22 '01 Write an essay on this topic.
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The Bottom Line My son taught me some things about death, he was my grandfathers voice. We shared that same love for the same person.
who at the time was about 5 years old. My grandfather was our best friend. And on March 25th will be five years he has been gone. I was wondering if there would be anytime in my life that I could think about him and not cry. I miss him and my son misses him. He was the one that planned the holiday dinners, insisted that he cut the ham.He planned the camp outs. He was the father I never had. Realizing that I wasn't the only that would miss him and be deeply wounded by this loss of such a wonderful man, I thought, Oh my goodness how is Julian (my son) going to take this. It was very early morning hours when I got that call from my grandmother, she told me that he passed on. She was strong, I think only for me. I cried and cried. She had me come to the hospital, where he passed. I remember the last thing he asked me was when were we going to go and fish. Something that we all looked forward to every Spring. Now it was still morning, Julian was awake when I got home. He knew I went to the hospital to see grandpa. But he took one look at me and he knew. He was five years old, I wondered how he knew. He came running up to me and hugged me so tight. Then he asked me did grandpa go to the place where there is no pain? He is where he won't get sick anymore right? All I could do was hug him. Why was it that he was taking this much easier than I thought? I was immediatly angry with my husband. Thinking that he told him. So I asked. My husband also in deep thought since that early morning call, said no. Julian told me that one day at the hospital my grandfather told him that he wouldn't be around for long. Julian had asked him what he meant and he quickly explained death and what happens when a persons body is old and tired, or and accident or illness happens. But he would not have to worry. He would be safe, and would watch over us and that my son would have to take care of my grandmother and I. Because he knew he was a strong young man. So Julian as sweet as he is he always knew and believed in himself to stay strong and understood at such a young age what was going to happen. Julian was like my therapists for he was able to tell me the same stories that my grandfather told me when i was a young girl.And I needed that.Julian was always the one that could probably talk about him and feel the proudest grandson ever. So sometimes its not that we as parents always have to explain to our children, sometimes it wise to let our children teach us.  |
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