A College Hedonist's Guide to Negril
Written: Mar 17 '01 (Updated Mar 18 '01)
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Product Rating:
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Pros: At Hedonism II, all you can eat, drink, see, and do is included...
Cons: ...provided you stay on hotel property. Nightlife at the resort leaves something to be desired.
The Bottom Line: All in all, I thought Hedonism II was really crazy. It wasn't the most happening place I've been to, but you definitely leave with plenty of stories to tell.
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| wfandrae's Full Review: Negril |
ON COLLEGE SPRING BREAK: Spring Break is a glorious time in a young person's life when they can leave behind all the worries and troubles of midterms, dorm rules, petty part-time jobs, and all sense of morality as soon as they get on the airplane. But before all that can occur, a great deal of planning must take place to ensure that the vacation will go off without a hitch. My group of fourteen, consisting mostly of my fraternity brothers and some of our girlfriends, went through a legitimate travel agent instead of one of the many internet sites and fliers promoting college spring break packages. We were at a great advantage this way because we had rooms with double occupancy instead of trying to cram five people in a room with one bed.
ON HEDONISM II: The travel agent helped us book the Superclubs Supersurprise program. In hindsight, it would have been better to book a trip where we would know all the details more than two weeks in advance. With four days left to go, the agent finally told us that we were going to stay at Hedonism II. We were all really excited once we found out, but it gave us little time to plan for the sights we would see and the clubs we would hit. Nevertheless, we boarded the plane and started drinking, and four hours later we were in the airport and buying up shots of coconut rum before we got to the Superclubs counter and they told us that we had gotten bumped to the Holiday Inn in Montego Bay for three nights. Let this be a lesson that no matter who helps you book the trip, you should confirm all the details with the hotel itself. They promised us that we would only spend three days in Mobay, and we would still get the all-inclusive package while we were there, and we would have those three days of our trip refunded once we got home. This was all fine and good, but three days anywhere isn't enough time to get settled in. We finally got to Hedonism II on the third day. The three girls who greeted us and took us from Holiday Inn to Hedonism made sure that we got really drunk and had an awesome time during the two hour ride. It was a lot of fun. Once at Hedonism, we had an easy time checking in, and our rooms were ready for us to settle in right away. The mirrors on the ceiling are a nice touch, along with the mirror located across from the bed. My girlfriend and I made excellent use of the bedroom facilities :) despite the ants that swarmed all over the dresser. There was no TV, but we didn't plan on watching any anyway, and the cd player was much more useful. The showers at Hedonism II have a nasty tendency to run hot and cold, so be careful where you stand when you take one. All seven rooms that my group had taken up, spread out all over the hotel, had bug problems and water pressure issues, so I guess this is not an isolated occurrence. Oh well--we didn't plan on staying in the room too often anyway. The beaches of Negril are far more scenic than those of Montego Bay. The only advantage Mobay has is that there aren't many bugs, so you won't get bitten up. If you're traveling to Negril, bring bug spray along with the sunblock. Speaking of sunblock, I brought spf fifteen and it was too much. I have an average, white complexion. If I stay out in the sun regularly, I can usually get a really good tan after a week or two with some fifteen block. Down there, fifteen was too high. I would suggest trying around ten or eight, or even five, if you want to get a good tan. There was plenty to do during the day--volleyball, circus workshops, and bars and grills on the beaches on the prude side, and a similar scene on the nude side but with naked people. I only went to the naked side a couple times during the day, but the others who went informed me that the naked side had all the action. We went down to Rick's Cafe one afternoon to watch the sunset and jump off the 48 foot cliff (incredible), but the food is pricey so get there before four so you can get some food at 50% off. Cab fare ran us about 10-15 a person round trip. If you bring 30-40 bucks each time you go out, you should have no problem getting your drink and eat on, and then some. We ended up going into the cliffs most nights because there really wasn't too much going on at the resort at night.
ON NEGRIL NIGHTLIFE: If you decide to go to the clubs, hit up Risky Business, Margueritaville, and the Jungle. Save the Pickled Parrot and Rick's Cafe for the early evenings. Bring cash, because nobody's gonna take a traveler's check at a club. Get traveler's checks cashed early--they'll give you Jamaican currency, so pay attention to exchange rates and understand how this works before you travel (of course, you should do that before you travel anywhere outside the country). Don't expect to find too many atm's. I didn't see any. This is a country of extremes--either people are rich or poor. Most native people, unfortunately, are very poor. I don't think they have much use for an atm machine.
ON THE JAMAICAN PEOPLE: Don't be afraid of them; they are very nice and extremely laid back. "Respect" means thank you in their dialect. It's cool listening to what they have to say, but it can get tiresome to hear what special deals and great bargains they'll offer you. Don't be afraid to say no. Your better bet, though, is to walk away if you have no plans on buying anything. There are shops everywhere in Jamaica, and you can talk any price down to whatever you believe is reasonable. HAGGLE. Rest assured that the ten dollar necklace can be yours for five. And if you're looking for the sacred weed, be not afraid. Everyone will try to sell it to you. At Hedonism II, you can pick up whatever you're looking for, and you can really do whatever you want right on the beach. Even the resort employees told us so. So go ahead and spark that J if you feel like getting lit up on the beach.
ON HEDONISTIC PLEASURE: If you're staying at Hedonism II, you're paying a good amount of money. Now ask yourself this question: why would you spend over a thousand dollars to come to a resort known for its lewdness and open-air depravity if you aren't going to take part in some of it for yourself? Don't be the guy sitting out on the sidelines because you're worried someone is staring at what you got down below. Rest assured everyone is checking out what you got, but who cares because everyone is naked and you'll never see them again anyway. My girlfriend and I went down to the nude beach the first day that we got there, and I was rather intimidated. Everyone's naked (obviously) and you feel like a total foreigner walking around with clothes on. I decided not to go back to the nude side again in the day, although my girlfriend and her other two sorority sisters went there to tan. At night is a different story altogether. I went there with the other two couples in my group, because I was drunk and on a dare, and after a few minutes hanging out in the cold, dark, empty pool by ourselves, we went over to the huge, lit up jacuzzi that was occupied by about 20 or 30 people all taking part in some sexual activity or watching others do so. I have to say it was really intense--like straight out of a late night HBO series or something. I got more comfortable after a few minutes of chillin in the hot tub, and my rather adventurous girlfriend and I kind of dabbled as well. By the third and last night of our stay, we gave it up and just went at it with a huge audience all around. It was crazy. If you don't have someone, or you can't find someone, you can still enjoy plenty of shows. Anything and everything you can imagine can be witnessed at the nude jacuzzi. And don't feel safe just because you're in the clothing-optional disco. Blatant acts spontaneously jump off on the stage, so if you're prepared then you should definitely get your dancin' shoes on (if you want to even wear that much). If you don't think you can handle watching others do their thing, maybe the disco isn't your thing. But then again, if you can't take it, you shouldn't be at Hedonism II in the first place.
Recommended:
Yes
Best Suited For: Couples
Best Time to Travel Here: Anytime
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Epinions.com ID:
wfandrae
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Member: alex last name sort of sounds like 'PEE core'
Location: Garden City, NY
Reviews written: 9
Trusted by: 7 members
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