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I want this,,,I want that,,,,give me,,,,give me,,,,give meMay 03 '01 Write an essay on this topic.
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The Bottom Line There are benefits to giving a child an allowance, as long as you go about it the right way.
Do you give your kids an allowance or don't you. This is what I have found, the more you give the more they want. I find that it is cheaper for me to give my kids an allowance than it is to give them money when they ask for it. Deciding to give your child an allowance has several benefits. I didn't use to give my children an allowance. If they asked for money to go to the mall with a friend or to the movies or something of that sort, I just gave it to them. But I found that they asked more and more and it was breaking the bank. Also they figured if I would give it to them when they asked that they didn't have to do anything in return. I mean they wouldn't keep their rooms cleaned. They wouldn't do any chores, they fought all the time and things just got way out of hand. Being a single mother, I hold two jobs to be able to support my family. My children are old enough to pretty much take care of them selves when I am at work, though there is someone around most of the time due to the fact that we are surrounded by family. It got to the point when I was at work, the would make all sorts of messes and not pick up after themselves at all. Making even more work for me after putting in 12-14 hour days. This became a problem. I mean I don't expect my children to do all the house work, but I do expect them to pick up after themselves. So this is what I decided to do. I wrote up a list of house rules. A rather extensive, detailed list. I had to do this because children don't seem to be able to read between the lines. They read what is there and that is it. If you say clean the living room then all they do is pick stuff off the floor. But if there are 10 dirty cups sitting on the coffee table they stay there because I didn't say clean the stands. I made this list which included not only chores, but respect tactics, such as not talking back and doing what they are told without asking why. It included rules on fighting among each other and rules about having children in the house when I am not home and that sort of thing. When I wrote this list, I made each one of them read and sign it, agreeing to the terms. I made a chart where I put marks on for every possitive and negative point of each day. I promised to give them so much money every week in return for following the house rules. I mean I know that kids aren't perfect and they are going to have off days and I understand that, but there has to be a line drawn somewhere. So this is how I handle the allowance that I give them. Each week they are allowed so many "points" against them. If they exceed that limit then they get no allowance for that week. If they have an extraordinary week, they get a small bonus. Then they get no extra money except under special circumstances such as school events and what not. I have found that this works wonders. They have learned the responsibility of doing their chores. They don't fight nearly as often, they use to fight like cats and dogs. LOL They have learned the value of a dollar. If there is something that they want specifically, they save their allowance to be able to get it. They realize what it is like to not have the money for something that they really want. The two oldest ones have even come to me and thanked me for this change because they now realize that money doesn't "grow on trees" like they use to believe. They also see that restricting their money leaves more money for family fun times. They find that they enjoy being around one another more than they use to. They like the fact that mom isn't as crabby because when she comes home from work she can relax instead of having to do even more work. There are definately benefits to giving children an allowance but they should have to earn it.  |
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