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Until this week I had never heard of a chemical pregnancy.May 11 '01 Write an essay on this topic.The Bottom Line Seek comfort from others who have been there, it does help. And you know I wish I never had. I wrote a review earlier this week about pregnancy tests. You see I was having symptoms and took several tests. I ended up getting a positive Sunday night and 2 more on Monday morning. I called my doctor and they had me come in for a blood test. I would get the results on Tuesday. Monday night I told my husband but I was feeling a little hesitant. The lines on all the positives had been very light. It just seemed odd to me but I had always been told a line is a line. I also had physical symptoms of early pregnancy. Well the next day the results were in and they were borderline! What did that mean, borderline? Either I was not as far along so the levels were low, or something was wrong. I was asked to come in again the next day for another blood test. They would be looking to see if the levels increased. They should if this were to be a healthy pregnancy. The time dragged and I shed many tears. I felt like an emotional wreck. I had the second blood test and again had to wait till the next day. This morning I called and was told the second blood test showed up as negative for pregnancy. This was what they call a chemical pregnancy. The sperm and egg did fertilize but then failed to progress and develop. I spent a lot of time on the internet looking up chemical pregnancy since I had never heard of it. It is a form of a miscarriage. It is actually quite common and happens to a lot of women and often they never even know it. They may be a few days late and then have a really heavy period and it could be the end of a chemical pregnancy. I am really conflicted about my feelings right now. I am sad, I really was ready to have another baby. To me, and based on my beliefs, this was a baby. It was not just a fertilized egg, or a bunch of cells, but a baby. So I grieve that loss. Then I think of all the women who lose babies much further along in their pregnancy and I feel wrong to be sad. I have not experienced the pain they feel or the depth of the loss. Yet I did lose something today. I lost the child I thought would be joining our family in January 2002. We will try again and hopefully be blessed with another little one. I guess through writing this I just wanted to express my thoughts and share with others who may have also lost their little ones early on.  |
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