Divorce: A Child's View
May 12 '01 (Updated Sep 02 '01)
The Bottom Line I advise ALL couples who are getting divorced not to argue in front of their children, around their children or anywhere within hearing distance.
I am now 24 years old. I have never been married yet I have gone through 3 divorces.
My parents divorced when I was 6. My mother and father both remarried. They both also divorced from their second spouse.
The hardest one for me personally was when my parents divorced. At six years old I had trouble understanding exactly what was going on. My mother and I moved out of my dads place and rented an apartment.
When I was with my dad he would ask me who I wanted to live with and I told him that I wanted to live with him. I would then go back to my mom's apartment and tell her I wanted to stay living with her.I wasn't lying...I just wanted to live with both of them.
Each of my parents were under the impression I wanted to live with them. When my father and mother would be around each other they would argue about who I should live with.
The one item they would consistently argue over was myself. Their only child.I loved spending time with my parents individually. I could not stand it when my mom would pick me up at my dad's place.
They would argue about various items but the one consistent word that was always in their arguments was my name. As a six year old I thought that it was my fault that they were always arguing. It had to be my fault...they were always saying my name. This is how I sensed my environment during that emotional period of my life.
I advise ALL couples who are getting divorced not to argue in front of their children, around their children or anywhere within hearing distance.
I am not a professional counselor but I do know what not to do in a marriage. I have not always been the most ethical person in the last few years. The one thing that has ALWAYS stuck with me is that I Will NOT get divorced.
Until I am 110 percent sure...I will not get married. When I do get married I will not cheat on my wife. I will treat my wife with the up-most respect. I will not spend all my time at the bar.
When I know in my mind that I can do this with no hesitations I will get married. Until then, my personal battles continue.
UPDATE_________________________________the personal battle has ended...I have won!
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Epinions.com ID:
Canfield
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Member: Daniel Canfield
Location: Twin Falls, Idaho
Reviews written: 29
Trusted by: 22 members
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