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Re: Oooooooh. Low blow! (Reply to this comment)
by canuckyeti
Dearest Becka,
Naturally I had to go and read about R-Chi's adventures to even to respond to your comment. I like R-Chi so far. She's a spunky gal.
Now about those bumper stickers. . if they were already affixed to your 'previously enjoyed' 1997 Honda, they obviously add 'pre-owned' chic, and an easy out for you. Double bonus points if they're stuck to painted surface.
However, any more post sale additions should probably be cleared through me before permanent installation.
Thanks for dropping in old girl. I have added you to my WOT, you're one of a select 42.
Fondly,
Yeti
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Jan 20 '02
5:17 am PST
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Oooooooh. Low blow! (Reply to this comment)
by LatteChick
Your car should not have any of the following: Yosemite Sam Back off! mudflaps, chainlink licence plate frame, bumper stickers of any sort, stuffed animals suction cupped to interior windows, neon of any kind, a Peeing Calvin sticker, small plastic ball on the antenna, CB radio, or rear tyres dramatically larger than front tyres.
R-Chi the Wonder Chick happens to have a CB in her Honda, as well as two bumper stickers reading "Stupidity should be painful" and "Stop following me! I don't know where I'm going" respectively.
And I think she's a pretty cool chick.
Great essay anyway.
~Becka~
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Jan 19 '02
8:58 pm PST
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Great stuff! (Reply to this comment)
by miselainis
I was shaken AND stirred!
m.
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Nov 20 '01
2:07 pm PST
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Spellbinding (Reply to this comment)
by sundogg99
... and marginally on-topic! I laughed, I cried, I wondered about you.
This was a hoot. Thanks for playin'.
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Aug 15 '01
11:48 am PDT
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Re: Re:+Re:+You+used+the+three+magic+words: (Reply to this comment)
by 29th_Candidate
Only in countries that won't arrest you for "possession of a controlled rip."
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Aug 14 '01
2:51 pm PDT
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Re: Re:+You+used+the+three+magic+words: (Reply to this comment)
by canuckyeti
What is ripsnorting? Is it legal outside Haiti?
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Aug 13 '01
10:54 am PDT
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Re: You used the three magic words: (Reply to this comment)
by 29th_Candidate
Hey canuckyeti--
You hit the sweet-spot with this little consumerly-helpful ripsnorter--
I'm impressed (yet, perhaps a little sad, being that I'm a bit of a libertine,) that you were able to put together such an amusing and well-written review. This could not have been an easy task considering:
--You somehow found it in yourself to resist the temptation to provide graphically explicit descriptions of Bond's raunchier, hardcore sexual escapades, or explicitly graphic descriptions of the less-suntanned physical attributes of the femme fatales with whom he escapaded.
(My shameful strategy: "When in doubt; eliminate all visible clothing.")
--Your review somehow, managed to stay on-topic. Heck, I don't recall seeing so much as even ONE topic change or off-topic digression from your original "James Bond" discussion.
(No shabby feat, when I consider how many times I ramble off-topic w/in a given sentence... .)
--You won the approval of AggieBrett, who is notorious for his hatred of interesting, entertaining and personable reviews like this one. For AB to restrain himself from becoming physically violent upon reading a "personality piece" like yours, each individual sentence of every paragraph would have to look like a three-day old "white-head" zit the morning after a drinking binge, or like a Pygmy tribes-woman in her 10th month of pregnancy, the hour before giving birth to quintuplets, it was so excessively bloated by the weighty payload of scads of useful product information calculated to help the consumer make better buying decisions it contained.
(...and who I'm told "NH"s every review he reads that fails to incorporate his 3 magic words.)
--You avoided expressing yourself with gratuitously salacious expressions like: "shit," "ass," "fuck," tits, and/or twat;" which are words that are almost always offensive to people who are offended by them.
I know this to be true, because I recently partook of an unnaturally brief phone conversation with a dignified-sounding gal, who identified herself as the representative of a local college chapter of these people. She was pleased to inform me I had been selected for membership in their distinguished ranks, if I desired it. Having been caught off-guard by her generous offer, I absent-mindedly replied, "No shit?"
Ahh well... I suspect it was probably just never meant to be.
...But, I digress.
Bottom line: Congrats on your excellent, funny review; --It was certainly well worth the read.
Cheers--
29th
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Aug 13 '01
7:34 am PDT
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Very Entertaining... (Reply to this comment)
by ermitano
...I read in a James Bond Handbook that a self respecting agent may drink beer but only while in Germany and only during Oktoberfest.
True?
N
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Aug 13 '01
12:21 am PDT
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Re: You+used+the+three+magic+words: (Reply to this comment)
by canuckyeti
Look, if you wanna be a Double Nought spy a la Max Baer, then you have to know when to hold 'em (romance 'em) and when to fold 'em (paralyzing judo chop). This should have been made clear in Section DZ-015 of Is that Hai Karate I sm--THWACK!, your employee manual/guide into intimacy.
Thanks so much for your question, agent. And may God bless.
Yours, in freedom,
The Canuck Yeti
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Aug 12 '01
12:48 pm PDT
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You used the three magic words: (Reply to this comment)
by AggieBrett
caltrops
tyres
douche
I have a standing rule to automatically slap a VH and a shiny gold star to any review with all three of those three magical words.
One Q-- how do I know when to bed an exotic icy blonde Russian babe as opposed to subdue with a vicious judo chop said exotic icy blonde Russian babe? I have my white dinner jacket and exploding cufflinks, but I'm still unlcear on this whole "bed/judo chop" thing, and my Sally Struthers Double-Nought Spy Home Study Course is hopelessly vague on this point.
Waiting hopefully, I remain, as ever,
.
.
.
B
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Aug 12 '01
9:27 am PDT
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what makes this so topical... (Reply to this comment)
by jkkelley
...is that James Bond being a Limey, and the French having historically often whined about the actions of the British, any discussion of James Bondesque stuff is definitely going to inspire French whines.
You realize, of course, that now the only thing for you to do is join the Fez Conspiracy.
jk
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Aug 10 '01
2:54 pm PDT
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great review... (Reply to this comment)
by systemdwn
very funny...but unfortunately off-topic. I can't force myself in rating this any higher than a NH.
sorry,
FR
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Aug 10 '01
2:27 pm PDT
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Wonderful! Hilarious! (Reply to this comment)
by canuckyeti
. . . a triumph! Makes me want to stand up and cheer!
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Aug 10 '01
2:27 pm PDT
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bravo.. (Reply to this comment)
by lukasneville
hilarious. simply perfect.
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Aug 10 '01
2:18 pm PDT
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