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A funny thing happened on my way to the write-offSep 05 '01 Write an essay on this topic.
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The Bottom Line If you haven't figured this one out, you got problems that I can't help you with.
I put the pro in procrastinate. Some of you may try and argue that you indeed hold the title of the world's greatest procrastinator, but I assure you that you are wrong. As a matter of fact, I recall one weekend when I had a big test to study for. On the way home I stopped by to buy some fish food and ended up coming home with several new rocks and an entire new filter system. I got home and quickly started taking apart the fish tank, the new filter had to be set up immediately you know. I had set up a smaller tank for the fish to live in and had the 30-gallon tank from my bedroom completely taken apart. It was at this point that I said to myself, "Hey self, you've been wanting to paint this room for a while now, but didn't want to take the tank apart to do so, well look, the tank is apart and now you should paint." "You know self," I responded, "That's one damn fine idea. Damn. Fine." So the decision was made that my fish would get a new filter, my room would get a new color and I would get my test studied for, well, when I got to it. Not bad for trying to get out of studying, eh? (I ended up with a B on that test, by the way. Yeah, I'm good.) Procrastinating has actually been beneficial to me in many ways. For instance, I work under pressure like no one else I know. I'm also multi-task oriented, work well with people, and am available to start work immediately… Sorry, I thought I was typing out my resume for a moment there. As I was saying, procrastination has become a part of my every day life. Why do today what you can put off for tomorrow, ya know? My writing process especially is full of ritualistic procrastination. I spend 90% of the time I put aside for writing thinking about what I could be doing instead, and the other 10% thinking about what I'm going to have for dinner. Sadly I'm not exaggerating too much here. Shortly after Biggs219 and I were done hosting the Idiot Write-off, he sent me an email that said, "Hey wanna do another write-off? Write for one, not host one this time." I told him to send me details and then I jumped aboard. I had been wondering what in the hell a lot of topics were doing on Epinions myself since I had joined. I figured I would be able to have a little fun with the topic and write would should be a relatively easy Epinion. Little did I know that life sometimes just doesn't want you to do what you plan. I knew I had a three-day weekend before I had to have the write-off entry done. I was planning on using this time for putting off writing until the last night, when I would go home, crank out everything I had been turning over in my head for the last week or so (an important part of my writing process) and turn it into a masterpiece by dawn. Unfortunately, when you put things off until the last day, you don't have a chance to make a back up plan when life throws you a curve ball. I was in the car, driving home. My plan was to go home, grab a bag a chips and shackle myself to the computer desk until I was done writing. Not two blocks from my house my phone rang. The caller ID showed that it was my friend who has four kids, all four and under. "What's up?" I answered. "Jennifer, what are you doing tonight?" Ooh oh, I thought, she needs a sitter. As I'm sure anyone can understand, watching four kids, three of them in diapers was NOT my idea of a good way to spend the evening. "Not much, what's going on?" "Well, I had an emergency come up and you were the only one I could think of that would help me out." She genuinely sounded like she was in a spot. "How long do you need me for?" "Well," she hesitated, "I don't need a sitter." "Oh." I was confused, "What's the deal?" "Well, we got lice." I sighed, "I'll be right over." So instead of writing this review I spent the entire evening wearing a shower cap, combing through my friend's hair. Have I mentioned yet that she has the thickest hair of anyone I've ever known? Oh yeah, and it reaches to the middle of her back. Now that's what I call friendship. That brings me to today. I have to come up with something witty and interesting to say about the topic, "What is dessert." Well, I can't. Sorry, but I just can't think of anything to say that could even remotely justify having this topic on Epinions. So I am going to do every member and non-member on the site a monumental favor. I am going to close the topic of "What is dessert" forever. Webster New World: A course of fruits, pudding, pie, ice cream, etc served at the end of a meal. Not to be confused with Desert: An uncultivated region without inhabitants, wilderness. Or as my friend Scott says, "Beef: It's what's for dinner. Dessert: It's what's after dinner." And that my friends should clear up the wild chaos and confusion that must have surrounded the subject to make it important enough to warrant it's very own section at Epinions.com. This is my belated entry to the What the hell is this category here for write-off. I encourage you to check out the other participants, I've read a few already and they are great. Dantesguide BigMatt Kris-Kochanski Teddiec Biggs219 mattygroves Priyatha arielssong Vormancian Mnehr repulsemonkey deaser26 emptywishes sumo_rhino thom413 matt_harney Mattels  |
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