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Police Arrest Spermologer for Beating Small ChildSep 19 '01 (Updated Sep 28 '01) Write an essay on this topic.
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The Bottom Line Make known what is appropriate behavior, enforce rules, and for the love of God, do not give into tantrums.
While that hasn't been on the front page of the newspaper yet, there are many stories less likely. Stay with me here, I'm about to explain...I've never hit, smacked, slapped, burned, kicked, or even 5 ironed a kid. Have I wanted to? Absolutely. But, I would much rather, hit, kick, punch, backhand, assault, or pull the hair of the parents of these kids. Not just any kids, but kids who constantly misbehave in public. As annoying as the children are, their parents are much much worse. I do not understand how people can allow their kids to run amuck and destroy stores and make noise CONSTANTLY without even batting an eye. Much of my anger and rage is constantly fueled at work. Golf stores are not toy stores. As obvious as that seems to me, there are many people who don't quite comprehend that. The Fountain On the side of our putting green, there's a large fountain made out of fake rock-looking stuff. I hate the fountain. Sure it is pretty to look at, but it's noisy and it attracts kids like flies on sh---errr...flies at a barbeque. From that point, there's a pretty classic kid response: 1. There's a slight pause, eyes open wide, change of expression (they start off with that "kid in a candy store" face, then realize that this stuff is much more expensive, they can have fun with and destroy it, and NOT EVEN HAVE TO PAY ANYTHING!) 2. Kids have a natural gift for eyeing the most expensive putters we've got. Which, is just fine, if they were actually planning on trying the putter so see how it feels, performs, etc. But, that fake rock-looking stuff extends around the perimeter of the putting green a couple feet high. Unfortunately, that wall looks more like the boards surrounding a hockey rink. Kids pick up on this as well. 3. As you may have guessed, the next step is the crossing of the overly expensive putters and the hockey mood. Slapshotted golf balls soar from side to side, flags are knocked over, the ear-piercing sound of expensive metals crashing into fake rock fills the air. Shrieks and giggles of delight echo. Putters are dropped and thrown, but worry not, no kid is left empty-handed, new victims are grabbed quickly so the games carry on. 4. Sometimes, hockey's not possible. This is usually because there are too many people on the putting green who are actually putting and that just kills the availability of space. Climbing on the fake rock-looking structure also seems to be a favorite pastime of kids. They climb all over the thing paying no attention to the fake vegetation decorating it. As silk leaves fall, the kids climb higher and higher with the drive of a person scaling Everest. First of all, it's rude to climb on something that's purpose is eye candy. Next, it's dangerous. There's water near it increasing the chance of slippery pseudo-rock. So, being an employee, I get irritated on a few levels. The first of which would, of course, be simply because the dumb kid was climbing all over the place. But, beyond that, we are a nation of victims (sidebar-that's one of my favorite phrases). You don't need me to tell you that many many parents would try to sue our company should their clumsy misbehaving offspring fall and be subjected to injury. Although, taking customer service into account, I cannot act on the initial, but am responsible for the latter. Rather than yelling at kids, I usually look for the adult who is supposedly responsible for them. A few weeks ago, two boys were playing a game of "King of the Pseudo-Rock Mountain" and I got all bitter. I estimated they were about 7 and 8 years old (in my opinion, surely old enough to know better). I easily located their mother, who was standing just beneath them, but was seemingly oblivious to their ascent. I told her that she "needed to get them down please" and I mentioned something about danger blah blah blah. She got kind of rosy cheeked, smiled, batted her eyelashes, chuckled, and replied, "well, I've been trying to get them down, but I can't" smile, smile, giggle, smirk, then continued, "boys, did you hear the lady? You need to get down please." She never apologized for their behavior, seemed angry at them, or even phased that store employees are more active in disciplining her kids than she. I was quite tempted to ask her how she thought she was going to be able to control her sons at 15 and 16 when she wasn't even capable of keeping them off a fake fountain in a golf store. But, I exhibited some self control and hoped my facial expression said something of that sort. Screaming, Crying, Whining Annoying kids are not just those who beat our putters and make messes. I cannot handle noisy kids either. I understand when an infant is crying, I really do. However, if a baby carries on long enough, (s)he should be taken outside as not to continually disturb others. I'm not too bothered by toddlers who cry, either. They are still at an age where it's fairly reasonable to cry. However, there are lots of parents who just set their kids down and let them wail away. Maybe they've gotten used to that nasty sound pitch and are capable of tuning it out, but I have not. Most other customers and employees have not. Again, I can be understanding when small children scream, cry, and whine, as long as their parents take quick action to stop them. What I cannot tolerate is older kids who scream and cry and throw temper tantrums in hopes of getting their way. When a child is four years old, (s)he should know better. There is absolutely no excuse for it, yet I see it daily. It's not funny, it's not cute, and one of these days I'm going to snap and chew out hysterical kids and grinning parents alike. What's just AWESOME is when a parent finally begins to get embarrassed and gives in to the kid's tantrum. Way to go Mom and Dad, I'm sure that if you give in JUST THIS ONCE (like you're currently claiming and have likely claimed many a time in the past) that your children will never throw another tantrum. Counting is another favorite of mine. This is another common tactic of suddenly embarrassed parents. (background sound: screaming, crying, yelping, utter chaos) *loud Mom-ish voice:* "ONE, TWO.......TWO AND A HALF, TWO AND NINE SEVENTEENTHS, TWO AND FOURTEEN TWENTY-FIFTHS, TWO AND THIRTY-FIVE FORTY-SECONDS..." fraction after fraction slowly and unsurely approaching three. In my opinion, when a parent requests something of a child it should be now, not if or when the parent gets to the count of three. Usually those are just fraction lessons until kids get bored or embarrassed that their parents are screaming numbers all over the place. There is no reason for kids to act out in pubic or anywhere else. Granted, kids are kids and will do so to an extent. Most will test their limits and do so quite often. However, if parents would simply set rules and insist their children abide by them, it would not be such a big issue. Discipline should start with babies. If kids are taught from day one what is and is not appropriate, and they are held to the rules set for them, they'll learn what they can't get away with it and quit trying. Much of this is about respect. You need to respect the people around you, respect the place in which you are, and remember that you're the person who has to take those monsters home, and you're the person who has to deal with teenage years....better get control soon, huh? An afterthought...so does Spermologer hate kids? Nope! Absolutely not. I love kids. I think they are very very cool...as long as they behave.  |
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