REPEAT AFTER ME: "I'M DOING IT - QUITTING FOR REAL THIS TIME..."updated 10/11/02Jan 04 '02 (Updated Oct 11 '02) Write an essay on this topic.
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The Bottom Line REPEAT AFTER ME: "I'M DOING IT - QUITTING FOR REAL THIS TIME..." I DID DO IT! I'M A NON-SMOKER!!!!! 4/4/02
Just a beginning thought for those of you who are contemplating quitting smoking - Be prepared !!! YOU ARE IN FOR THE FIGHT OF YOUR LIFE!!! I personally feel that quitting smoking is just as easy as eating your way through a Locust Tree in the middle of winter with nothing but your own teeth! Yes, that's how I really feel. I have been smoke free for almost three days now, and THIS TIME it's for good. I've quit for a day here, an hour there, and even when my husband went cold turkey 10 years ago, I continued to puff away. HOW DID I GET INTO SMOKING ANYWAY? I actually started smoking in a community college cafeteria when I was 18 years old. Why? To keep a guy away from me that hurt me after a long term relationship. I knew he HATED smoke, so I started to smoke. STUPID STUPID STUPID. I should have told him to go jump into a lake, but young and stupid was I! So here it is 15 years later, and I am finally getting that monkey off of my back. If I only had known how bad I was hurting myself by trying to hurt him. STUPID STUPID STUPID. HOW DID I PREPARE/DO TO QUIT FOR GOOD THIS TIME - VS OTHER FAILED ATTEMPTS? #1 - I got the prescription from my regular physician and started two weeks ago in taking 150 mg (two tablets) for a few days, then keeping a happy flow of medication of 75 mg a day even up until today. I plan on staying on this medication until I no longer feel the need to take it - for smoking or otherwise. I HAVE HAD SOME SIDE EFFECTS SUCH AS COMPLETE "FOGGINESS OF THE BRAIN" (more-so than usual - forgetting to brush teeth, setting stuff down and can't remember where I put it, etc.), SLIGHT HAND TREMORS, AND LOSS OF SLEEP (I wake up EVERY half hour each night). This is a small price to pay for what I will get out of this in the end. PLEASE MAKE SURE YOU KEEP YOUR DOCTOR INFORMED OF ANY SIDE EFFECTS YOU ARE FEELING. #2 - Destroy any cigarettes, empty ashtrays - get rid of them, hide away your lighter/matches and wet every butt and put them in the garbage. AS DISGUSTING AS IT IS - A TRUE SMOKER ON A NICOTINE HUNT WILL DIG INTO AN ASH TRAY TO SMOKE A BUTT IF DESPERATE ENOUGH. I HAVE, and know many who have also. SO GET THOSE BUTTS OUT OF THE HOUSE AS WELL AS DESTROY ANYTHING THAT RESEMBLES A CIGARETTE. Even those gag gifts of a cigarette in glass - break in case of emergency ones - If it is in your house, you'll smoke it! I'm not lying - I even thought about digging through the butts in the ashtray of my car. I'm craving one right now as I think about the fact there are some still in my car. Sick, but I'm really addicted. I tied up the garbage, and put it outside further reducing the smell, or image being anywhere near me. I'm going to clean my car ashtray as soon as I'm done with this Epinion. #3 Get Nicorette or a similar product to help you when you are really frothing at the mouth for that beautiful tobacco goddess that makes you feel so good. I'M FROTHING JUST THINKING ABOUT IT.... OK... I'm better now that I stuck a piece of Nicorette Orange 2mg in my mouth. It does keep me from running to the store just to have one smoke to help take the twinge away. It keeps me from the "smoking" action that I enjoy so much. If I can keep from having just one smoke.... #4 Tell someone that will help encourage you. Whether it be a family member (preferably NOT a reformed smoker who will not treat you like a failure if you slip). Someone who understands, who's possibly been there, and will lift you up if you fall. My husband is really being very supportive as this is WORSE THAN CHILDBIRTH! IT LASTS LONGER :) #5 STAY AWAY FROM SMOKE UNTIL YOU HAVE CONTROL OVER YOURSELF. I made the mistake of going into the local deli about a half an hour ago to get my daughter a snack, and someone was smoking in there. It smelled so good, I ran home and tore apart my medicine cabinet flinging things out of the way to find that box of Nicorette that I put away yesterday. I couldn't get the gum into my mouth fast enough....AHHHH!!! (You have to agree that this is better than picking up another smoke right???). THERE WILL COME A TIME WHEN I WON'T NEED THE GUM. #6 TAKE ONE DAY AT A TIME. I WILL to continue updating you on my progress on anniversaries such as one month, six months, and one year BECAUSE I'M GOING TO DO IT THIS TIME - COME HELL OR HIGH WATER!!! REPEAT AFTER ME: "I'M DOING IT - QUITTING FOR REAL THIS TIME..." HOW DO I CURRENTLY FEEL? I am cranky, quick to bite your head off, super mellow, sleepy, than bursting with energy - there is no happy medium. All I can think about is cigarettes, wanting cigarettes, and hating cigarettes for making me an addict. I have spent so much money on things to hide my closet addiction that I hid from a lot of people. I don't know how I did it, but with perfumed sprays, showering after smoking before going out, using whitening toothpaste, and airing out my coat before going to a non-smoker's place (such as my Daughter's school) - THEY NEVER KNEW I SMOKED. It was my evil secret. Or so they tell me - maybe they are just polite... Anyhow I've spent the last day sitting next to an exhaust fan smoking away from everyone, standing outside, or telling kids to go into the other room so I can smoke. I'm going to rejoin those who I have avoided to get my fix...I'm not hiding anymore... WHAT AM I DOING TO CURB MY PRESENT CRAVINGS? How am I maintaining my sanity? (WELLBUTERIN - 75MG - THIS IS THE GENERIC TO ZYBAN) my happy pills & lots of hard candy, pretzel sticks, and keeping my fingers busy any way I can. I have gum, and I have purchased Halls Defense Vitamin C hard candies to eat instead of that chocolate ice cream in the freezer. I feel the Halls will help me with the sweet craving that I used to have after smoking. You know the cover-up mint, gum, etc??? I'm not a celery or carrot type of person, so that won't work. I WILL SURVIVE - I'LL BREAK THIS ADDICTION, AND HOPEFULLY WILL USE THIS EXPERIENCE TO HELP SOMEONE ELSE GET THROUGH THIS. UPDATED**JANUARY 24, 2002: ******** THANKS TO JBDUCKLING FOR ALL OF YOUR CONTINUED SUPPORT ****************** IT'S BEEN JUST OVER THREE WEEKS SINCE I'VE GONE "COLD TURKEY". IT HAS NOT BEEN EASY, IN THE WORDS OF JBDUCKLING" IT SUCKS, AND WOULD HAVE BEEN EASIER TO KEEP SMOKING". There are days when I want to scream and just buy smokes...It seems that I have realized that I used to smoke the most when relaxing. Now I feel like I CAN'T relax because I don't have that best friend in the world - my smokes... I'll figure something out, I'm sure.... I'm down to 2 - 3 pieces of nicorette a day as needed. I have to be honest and say one day I needed 4 / 5, but it's still better than smoking right? The craving is still there - not as strong as the first few days, but still present...I dream about smoking, encourage others to smoke around me so I get my "sniff fix". As long as I smell it, I won't do it - may not be such a bright idea, but I'm fooling my mind into thinking that I've already smoked - or I'm just sick and enjoy the smell from being a smoker for 15 years..... Others tell me that the smell will offend me at some point, but others who have quit for years still enjoy it's scent. Still hanging in there with the help of my husband Tom, my Daughter Sarah (who now knows that smoking is bad), and my cyber support system - JBDUCKLING. One day at a time, but still going!!!!! ****040402**** - SMOKE FREE FOR THREE MONTHS! I am starting to feel like my actual action of smoking was years ago as your lifestyle completely changes upon quitting! I am no longer cranky before, during, or after meals and I have been off of Nicorette since Mid February! I didn't need it anymore! I am actually feel like a non-smoker rather than a recovering smoker. I still enjoy the scent of a freshly -lit cigarette, but have ABSOLUTELY NO DESIRE to smoke it. I tell myself that smoking is like a drug, and I don't want the addiction again. I understand why others smoke, and enjoy smoking, but at this time in my life smoking just doesn't fit it. I have a 5 year old who keeps me moving, and I just found out I'm due for our second child in November. TALK ABOUT INCENTIVE!!! Why is that an incentive? I distinctly remember promising my newborn child that I would only smoke out the window on the way home from the hospital just that one time.... I am ashamed to say it wasn't the last time I smoked around my child. She suffered from ear infections, colds, and everything else they blame second hand smoke for. The pure guilt alone keeps me smoke free. I always have my child as well as other's children around me constantly, and am tired of hiding upstairs smoking out my bedroom window, or out in the snow, rain, & sleet (like a postal employee)to have my beloved smoke. I no longer miss my Smoking friend as I found that I am strong without my cigarettes. I feel sorry for those who have successfully quit, and have returned as they BEG me not to start again as the monkey is harder to kick the second time. I will fight to remain strong, and hopefully will never be begging another not to start again and describe my failure. If I, the person with the least amount of resistance to anything, can quit smoking and feel this good about myself, YOU CAN TOO! I am on my computer almost every day at different times, and am offering my personal experience to anyone who may just need someone to talk to. I will not look down on you, as I truly understand! It's easier to work with someone who has quit smoking rather than someone who has never smoked... You have to have been there to really sympathize! Best of luck to those who are on the path to non-smoking! Please feel free to email me: mrssmoopy@yahoo.com if you need/want to talk! See you again shortly! UPDATE 10/11/02 - I have been a non smoker for nine months now, and I won't lie and say there hasn't been times that I haven't wanted one. JUST DON'T DO IT!!!! I consider myself a smoke-a-holic and similiar to an alcoholic, if I take one drag of a cigarette, I know I'll return to smoking. I keep that in the back of my mind and think of it often. I'm enjoying the freedom of being a non-smoker in the fact that I don't feel ostrisized for liking smoking and having to go down the block and over three doors from a restaurant to have a smoke. The cigarettes here in NJ are now over $5.50 a pack. I don't think I could afford to smoke now anyway. REPEAT AFTER ME - I'M A SMOKE-A-HOLIC and can't take even one drag! See you on my one year anniversary!!!  |
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