A Man, A Dream, An Adlib. ADLIB W/O
Feb 08 '02
The Bottom Line Don't be a bad person, always provide SCADS in whatever you do.
This is a story about a man. A man with a dream. A man without boundaries. A man with a plan. This is a story about a man with a dream that had no boundaries, and sounded like a good plan. This is also an adlib. Grab a pen and paper, word editor, or whatever you prefer and play along.
Fill in the blanks with these words:
(1) retro toy
(2) miscellaneous button commonly found on toys
(3) body cavity
(4) old school rapper
(5) old school rapper's hit track
(6) adjective describing erectile dysfunction
(7) adjective describing the Roswell incidents
(8) retail location
(9) product
(10) product
(11) product
(12) corrective surgery
(13) favorite deviant member
(14) favorite deviant member
(15) favorite deviant member
(16) well-known conspiracy
(17) most hated editor/top reviewer
(18) most hated editor/top reviewer
(19) most hated editor/top reviewer
Once upon a time, there was a boy. At first he was like all of the other children. Until that day. His mom had brought him home a surprise. Just what he had always wanted, a ____(1)____! All was good until the ____(2)____ broke off and became lodged in his little ____(3)____. The poor child was not only left with physical scars, but also emotional ones that would haunt him for the rest of his life. What if the same thing happened to another child? How would anyone ever know not to purchase a ____(1)____?
Over and over in his disturbed little mind, he kept asking himself, "what can I do to help the consumers make more educated buying decisions?" The answer would not come until his latter years, after being exposed to the magical lyrics of ____(4)____. The inspiration had hit.
As a young man, he'd lay in bed at night, flipping the words to ____(5)____ while planning his perfect consumerly helpful business. High school was a rather ____(6)____ time for the young man. All of the other guys thought he was a little on the ____(7)____ side, but that didn't stop him. Sure he didn't fit in, but one day he'd rule the most conumerly helpful landfill on the face of the earth. Although frowned upon by his peers, he could always help his mom shop at the local ____(8)____, by giving her only the most helpful advice. The consumer was what was important to him. Who needed drinking, parties, drugs, fast cars, and even sex, when there were unsuspecting consumers about?
Years passed, and notebook after notebook was filled with ideas. Chronicles of every product ever used by himself and his family were chronicled. Every ____(9)____, each ____(10)____, and every ____(11)____ that fell into his hands. He knew what he wanted to do, he only needed a place to unleash the dragon. And then it dawned on him...the world wide web. The Internet was a growing goldmine for buyers and sellers alike. Scratch the "let them read the notebooks out of the parent's garage for a small fee" plan. This could be big, thought the man.
Like I was saying, this man had a dream, and that dream was to own the most prestigious, most consumerly helpful website on the planet.
After a lucky twist of fate, he received a large settlement for the ____(12)____ gone wrong. Now was the time. His love child with the consumers of the world was born, and boy, was it a pretty baby. A website where people could post experiences they'd had with products. A website where people could recommend or warn against products. A website where people could get paid for doing the above. "Buyers beware", thought the man, "you consumerly world is about to be rocked". He looked at what he'd created, and it was good.
Then came the bad people. Members by the names of ____(13)____, ____(14)____, and ____(15)____, not mention many others. These bad people wrote very bad things on the man's website, and it made him angry. They weren't conumerly helpful! They were bad. They joked about the injokable. The discussed the indiscussable. They lollygaged around and had secret underground societies and bad, bad writeoffs. Their actions could be even compared to ____(16)____. The man took a step back. This was bad.
What more to do, but threaten these bad people? He could send out his good members after them. Yes, that was it. He'd send ____(17)____, ____(18)____, and even ____(19)____, not to mention many others. He would stop them, with pure consumerly helpfulness powers. He would stop the bad people.
To this day, the war continues for this man with a dream. A dream the bad people won't let him enjoy.
This isn't ONLY a story about a man with a dream, but also a story with a moral. The moral of the story is, don't be a bad person. Let this man enjoy his dream. That's the end of the story, the beginning of the dream. Let this be a lesson to you.
With this, I bring you SCADS...
::This review was part of a write-off hosted by fallenjesusboy for which I was extremely and ridiculously late for. The other participants are as follows:
Annexation, BlackCat2, fallenjesusboy, galileo365, jsallen, lorace, Officer, shadow_dream, Thorbjore, and most importantly, myself::
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Epinions.com ID:
young1028
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Member: Evelyn Parker
Location: Kentucky
Reviews written: 139
Trusted by: 89 members
About Me:
Writer's Corner: A NEW and IMPROVED way to keep us out of Nirav's hair.
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