Asia Carerra's "Personal" Film: Appassionata
Dec 21 '02
The Bottom Line On a lark, I went out to rent an adult film. I've seen worse, but I wouldn't waste my time, unless you really want to see porn.
Note: This is a review of an adult, XXX film. This review is not pornographic, but it's fair to mention the topic right away.
As well, one of my readers made a joke about my risque fiction, and teased me about being a pornographer, so I figure that she'll be particularily amused at this review!
Adult films are a much maligned genre. The big reason is, of course, the accusation that they are nothing but sleazy sex, and very, very little plot (for those that even bother to have a storyline at all). Another equally compelling reason is the accusation that adult films are almost always geared towards men, to the detriment of women. Strong critics of pornography say that it degrades women, that it makes them into sex objects, etc, etc., and it’s certainly a legitimate concern. My view of pornography, so far, is that it’s a flimsy genre, but, while it can be, and is, frequently, offensive, it is often only bothersome, for the most part, if you hate no-holds-barred images of real sex.
My experience with adult film (and by this I mean the XXX variety) is extremely limited. I can sum up my history in one brief paragraph. My very first rental of an adult movie was Italian schlockmeister Joe D’Amato’s porno version of Romeo and Juliet. Having never seen porno in my life, I was ill-prepared for what I was about to see, and after ten minutes I was thoroughly disgusted, and turned off the video. (Being a sensible person, I didn’t ask for my money back; after all, I did get what I paid for.) After about a year or so, I went back to that same video store, and picked up something that I knew would be somewhat different: Candida Royale’s One Size Fits All. Being more prepared, I was able to watch the entire video, and wasn’t repelled, mainly because Royale’s Femme line is geared specifically for couples. I’ve also seen bits and pieces of other “films” here and there, for various reasons too extraneous to discuss here.
And now, tonight, I’ve rented my third XXX film in about the same number of years -- Asia Carrerra’s Appassionata. As with the other two titles, this one was rented because I’ve heard things about the film that figured that this could be a “respectable” experience. In this case, the story goes that Asia Carrerra, a well-known adult star, wanted to make a more “personal” film, interweaving her genuine interest in classical music, and Mozart, in particular, as well as her real skills with the piano, with the usual sexuality. All I can say is, while Carrerra certainly deserves points, this is no Amedeus, although there are a lot of powdered faces and period costumes.
There are two plots. One is in period costume, in which Asia plays a woman who shows off her piano skills to what appear to be a group of rejects from Milos Forman’s auditions for the role of Mozart. After the little demonstration, the men go off, except for a man who is apparently Asia’s beau. She calls him “Wolfie”, so I take it that this fellow is in fact Mozart, unless “Wolfie” was just a sexy nickname back in those days........
The second plot takes place in the present day, and involves Asia’s attempts to start a career in classical music. She plays for a sleazy looking guy, who then attempts to get sexual favors from her. She runs off, and hitches a ride with a guy who’s an artist. Like Asia, this guy is also a poor, starving artist, given to staying in campsites and sleeping in his van night after night. They find out about a millionaire who supports artists, and take a visit, not realizing that his motives are less than proper (this is a porn film, after all.) Asia again gives the millionaire the brush-off, because she won’t sell her sexuality just to get a break.
So there is a bit of a story, which is why I’d rather watch this than an amateur video consisting of no-names screwing each other until the muscles in every part of their body are rendered useless. It’s not a very well-told story, I’m afraid -- that’s because this is a porn film. An average porn film has many sex scenes. And an average porn film has many sex scenes that last forever, which kind of delays the plot just a little, I would say. The first sex scene in the movie takes place in the campsite. Asia is asleep in the van, and her male friend is surprised by two women who, at first, get angry at him for being a real ladies-man, etc, etc, but of course this turns into a sex scene. The scene isn’t one of those four minute love scenes set to cheesy rock music, but one of those ten minute scenes without a soundtrack.
But the funniest scene is reserved for the period storyline. The faux-Mozart guys throw a very unique bachelor party for one of them -- an orgy. The funniest thing about this orgy (which lasts at least ten on-screen minutes) is the fact that it’s scored to really badly adapted Mozart. The music sounds like something made out of those cheap electronic keyboards that my sister has. I was snickering throughout this entire scene. There’s also another orgy involving the millionaire and his harem.
Asia Carrerra is a lovely woman, and she is quite enjoyable in her sex scenes, both involving her male love interests in the parallel plots. She only gets two (one for each storyline), but they are much more sensual than anything else in this movie. Why? Because she actually looks like a woman who is having a good time while having sex. She’s not phoning it in, but is actually putting a sense of joy to the whole enterprise. This is a sex film, so naturally, the film comes alive when the performers express their pleasure. And that’s the thing -- I think it’s much more sensual to actually see the expressions of the people having sex, than it is to close in on sexual organs doing their thing. I’m not bothered by the fact that this is real sex, or even by the fact that penetration, or c*unnilingus (this is a real word; why can't I get this past the profanity filter????), or fellatio, are shown in detail, but I think it’s far too much, for someone like me, to have the camera literally bumping into the people’s waists, while it burns miles and miles of film showing uninterrupted penetration. I also think that it’s pretty silly that porn directors think it is a must to show an ejaculation shot every time as well. I think that if the people having sex are having fun, that’s proof enough for me.
I’m also a bit old-fashioned, too, I think. I think that a romantic XXX-movie would be a nice thing. You know, a love story, with a lot of hot sex scenes. The kinky threesomes and orgies are wild, but the sex scenes with just a man and a woman, who at least know each other a little bit, are a lot more convincing. But then, men aren’t into all that love stuff, are they?
This is not the worst movie I’ve ever seen, but it’s certainly the worst-produced I’ve ever seen. The sound mix is just atrocious; there are many scenes where you literally cannot hear the dialogue, unless you crank up the volume, and even then, you get a lot of audio hiss. Then suddenly, the sound improves, although this is not because of the sex scenes, where sound is what we all want to hear, but because the mix is just so haphazard. The movie is actually shot on film, which is a plus (although the film stock is pretty crummy), because at least it doesn’t feel as if I’m watching somebody’s home video of fornication. It’s pretty bad when an industry as wealthy as the porn business can’t even make a decent low-budget picture, but then again, I doubt that most viewers care about great sound and good cinematography.........
I also wonder why this movie had to have the sleazy men telling Asia that the only way for a woman to get ahead is for a woman to prostitute herself. I know this is a porn film, but couldn’t they think of less unsavory ways to introduce sex, and sex talk, into the movie? While Asia ‘s character doesn’t succumb to anything from the sleazeballs, this kind of plotline is probably half the reason why certain people hate pornography. What kind of morality is that?
The story did have potential, and Asia was good to at least put a little bit of herself in the script. Asia is also a beautiful woman, and I’ll be honest and say that I might watch her again sometime. However, people hoping for a real resolution to the plot will be sorely disappointed, and couples looking for “romantic” porn will only get such in Asia’s scenes. The rest are typical stuff. As a porn film, Appassionata does have some merit, but you really have to want to watch porn if you want to get anything out of this.......
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Epinions.com ID:
DavidMac
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Member: David Macdonald
Location: Prince Edward Island
Reviews written: 612
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About Me:
Alice, a story in nine parts, posted on Sept 24, 2008 - http://www.epinions.com/content_5241348228
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