The Night Before Christmas at MumMumMum's House
Dec 24 '02
The Bottom Line Merry Christmas Everyone!
Twas the night before Christmas at MumMumMum’s house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a…
Who the heck am I kidding? Everyone was freaking stirring, except the mice! They ran off to join the circus because it was quieter there!
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that Saint Nicholas soon would be there.
All right, so we don’t have a chimney, and it took Mr. Bob a while to figure out where to put the stockings, but they’re up, rather precariously and with as much care as possible, but what the heck, Saint Nick doesn’t care, does he?
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of sugarplums danced in their heads.
Yeah, right! The children might have been wrestled into bed, they sure weren’t nestled! And sugarplums! What the heck are sugarplums? They weren’t thinking about whatever those are, they were envisioning Game Boys, Soccer Lego, Dancing Dora, and toys toys toys!
And Mama in her kerchief and I in my cap,
Had just settled down for a long winter’s nap.
OMG, I’m laughing my head off! Me, wear a kerchief? In what lifetime? Mr. Bob wear a cap to bed? Too hysterical! Long winter’s nap? On Christmas Eve? With kids in the house? Bwaaahaaaahaaaahaaa!
Assembly time! Wrapping time? Call the neighbours to borrow tape time!
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter.
Feeling pretty sure it was the kids making all that racket, I was quite relieved to find they had all passed out!
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
Okay, so we don’t have a sash, and in fact I can’t even get the windows open because we’ve used 3M window insulator kits on them….but I did look out the window!
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below,
Well, the moon and the eight billion Christmas lights, snowmen, Santas, reindeer, and assorted other odds and ends the neighbours have up on their house gave quite a mid-day lustre! My hydro bill was high, I’d hate to see theirs!
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer,
With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name:
"Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now Prancer and Vixen!
On, Comet! on Cupid! on, Donner and Blitzen!
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"
In my younger, more “experimental” days (aka pre-parenthood) I might have actually “seen” St. Nick and his reindeer. But now, in my kinder, my gentler days, what I actually saw on the breast of the new-fallen snow was Mr. Bob, broom in hand, creating “sleigh tracks” and “hoof prints” in the snow. Right where we had placed our “Magic Reindeer Food” hours earlier with the children. (Oatmeal mixed with lots of glitter in a “magic zip-loc baggie”.)
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,
So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,
With the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too.
And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound.
After completing his covert operation Mr. Bob did not “prance and paw” his hoofs, he quietly came into the house to warm up. Baby, its cold outside!
He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot.
No, he was not covered in soot, he came in the front door, and we don’t have a fireplace anyway. No fur either, but I guess a down-filled jacket works just as well!
A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.
He couldn’t possibly carry all the toys our kids were getting on his back! Cardboard boxes, three of them, were dragged into the living room. All of those boxes full of gifts for my children, from friends, from relatives, from neighbours, from teachers. Santa had been to our house already, in the Christmas spirit of all those dear people who knew how hard this Christmas was going to be for us.
His eyes -- how they twinkled -- his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow.
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.
He had a broad face and a little round belly
That shook, when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly.
He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself.
Yep, his eyes twinkle, no dimples though! His cheeks were pretty red from the cold outside, his nose might have been a little red from the eggnog! The beard of his chin? Well, its getting grey all right! Four kids will do that to ya! No pipe! But a little round belly, just a little though! Yes, he was a jolly old elf, my dear sweet Mr. Bob showing the little bit of child remaining in the man.
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And filled all the stockings; then turned with a jerk,
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose.
He sprang to his sleigh, to his teams gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
Well, we stuffed stocking and arranged gifts, and gave each other a wink and sat down. Then we ate some cookies and drank some milk, and although we felt like floating to bed like the down of a thistle, we walked, slowly, tiredly, and very happily. But not before peeking in on our children and feeling so much love that we thought we’d burst.
But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,
"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"
Good-night to all my friends at epinions. I pray that you all have as many blessings in your lives as I have in mine. Peace, health, and happiness to all of you. Merry Christmas everyone!
With much thanks to Clement C. Moore, or whoever it is that is supposed to have written this story!
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Epinions.com ID:
MumMumMum
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 - Top 500 |
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Member: Beverley
Location: Canada
Reviews written: 290
Trusted by: 419 members
About Me:
So good to be home, but so very tired!
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