I got Pregnant Barbie Pulled From Shelves - can you top that?
Dec 28 '02
The Bottom Line Having reached many milestones and the height of my Epinion success, it may be time to say goodbye. Why not go out on top (after all it's my favorite position).
I guess it's finally time to pack up my toys and leave the sandbox known as Epinions. After reaching the height of Epinion success this week, I feel there's nowhere to go but down so it's best I pack up and leave.
After all I've been here 3 years - as of the December 21st - and have written 699 Epinions. Granted 579 or so of them would be deemed garbage by the standards of today, but how many of you can say they made $18.00 on an advice Epinion or $30.00 or $40.00 on an Epinion the first month or two after it had been published? They may be NH by the standards of today, but back in 2000 those "garbage" Epinions financed a week long trip to Disney World (for 3 adults and 3 kids - that's not chump change).
The decision to leave hasn't been an easy one - about as easy a decision as to what I should post for my 700th Epinion (I have about 10 in draft form and have been waffling over which one to finish and post for lucky 700). After the week I've had the decision was easy to make - scrap all the drafts and write about the power of ME!! I mean who else at this site has single-handedly caused a major chain of stores to pull a toy off the shelves (ROFL). If you can top that leave a comment, I'd love to hear what your Epinions have accomplished!
Of course I need to add, why shouldn't I write my last Epinion as one I won't get paid for, I'm sure the Epinion that inspired this one and has over 1100 non-member hits in two weeks and has inadvertently put my e-mail address and myself out in the spotlight won't pay me a dime either (ok maybe 2 cents, but certainly not a dime - I'll keep you posted as to how much it actually).
So just what was lucky Epinion 699 and why have I decided to call it quits - simple, I can never top the success of that Epinion - the Fat Lady has sung and it's time to take that final bow. I mean how can I ever compete with myself again - I'll never match the success of the past 17 days and frankly I don't feel like trying - I want to go out on top - not clawing my to the top after hitting rock bottom.
Long story short - on December 11th I wrote a little piece called, Barbie says, "Giving birth is glamorous!" about this ridiculous new doll by Mattel called Mattel Happy Family Midge and Baby. I knew I had to own one and write an Epinion.
For those of you who don't know me, you probably can't understand why any normal adult upon hearing of a brand new Barbie that "gives birth" would rush out in a snowstorm to buy her. Those who know me understand about my 11 years of Barbie h@ll, and why Midge was my next logical victim.
My issue wasn't with Midge - heck I hardly know her - my issue/beef is with Mattel and the ridiculous line of dolls they put out - dolls that tell my 5 yo Math Class is hard, dolls that say Barbie is a professional in mini skirts and spiked heels, and dolls that tie into products like Jell-O and milk - thereby jacking up the price of a doll that should cost about $4.99.
My piece was truly meant not to inform consumers but was written just a goof piece about a stupid product - OK, so saying it that way sounds like it was meant to inform some that I think it's stupid, but everyone is entitled to their own opinion. I wrote it to escape the drudgery and sameness of my life - more like a creative writing piece than an actual information piece.
Heck I'd be all Mrs. Big Head if I thought people read what I wrote to help them buy something - I mean can you just imagine the following scenario - mom and daughter are in Target or Wal-Mart, daughter grabs Midge and says she wants it. Mom looks over the $15.00 dollar doll, thinks and then says, "No Way, we need to read what NED1 says about this before we can buy it!"
Please the day Epinions stopped paying me for my Epinions is the day I stopped taking this site seriously - that is to say, I stopped looking at it was a way to help consumers and looked at it more as an outlet for fun writing - I mean I write survey manuals for the government, "pick up the BRE envelope, fold in half lengthwise as to not dent the affixed postage and place fold side up in the next envelope . . " After 8 hours a day doing that you can see why I need to feel creative.
I mean I got so caught in the having fun and goofing on all those Barbie dolls, that I actually forgot about this being a site consumers might go to for finding out info about a Barbie. That is I forgot until people began reminding me - and not in a very nice/flattering way.
The first two weeks after my Midge review had been posted, I got about 1,000 non-member hits. I thought that must be a goof – the most I ever got was 3500, and that was for a NAD’s review that is 2 ½ years old. I figured the glitch would get fixed, but the numbers kept going up – along with the comments – many nice, but some not so nice. I was also impressed with the number of folks who joined Epinions just to leave me a nasty comment (and never bothered to rate my Epinion – thanks a bunch, hugs and kisses).
Of course there were many others who circumvented that whole process and just got my e-mail address off my profile page - that way they could send me direct love notes starting with loving phrases that rhyme with witch and hunt. Starting about Monday of this week I noticed a significant increase in the amount of fan mail I got – I think on Thursday I started getting the real hate mail – that I was the reason Wal-Mart pulled this stupid doll off the shelf – h@ll if did that, I must be d@mn good at writing Epinions, and then I thought this site ought to pay me better.
Of course there was the slight problem with that accusation is that I don’t shop at Wal-Mart, not do I care what they do or don’t sell. The one next to me is a pit of filth, poor stocking and slow check out clerks (they make the ones at K-mart look like Olympic sprinters). My opinion is if Wal-Mart cares that little about how their stores look and function, then they don’t care about making sales or making the customer want to come back (yeah, I want to buy my milk and bread from a filthy store).
I also hate Wal-Mart for their need to police my children. When Wal-Mart stopped selling games with violent themes I said I’d never shop there again. Only I should decide what my kids will or will not play - no store has the right to dictate that to the consumer. Please this from a store that sells Olsen Twins toilet paper – what message does that send, “Feel free to wipe yourself with Mary-Kate and Ashley but don’t play violent games?”
I also don’t recall that lunch meeting I had with Mr. Wal-Mart where we discussed my desire to have that doll pulled from the shelves – heck if you knew me, you’d know that’s the last thing I wanted to happen – if Mattel ceases to churn out those dolls, I’ll have nothing left to write about – I mean how creative can you get about a box of crayons? (Mary-Kate and Ashley toilet paper – that’s a whole other story).
In talking with the hub about this, I came to realize that the bulk of my fan mail was a result of my forgetting what the site is used for – helping consumers make decisions – I was so caught up in the having fun part that I forgot someone outside the site might actually read what I wrote and take it seriously, or worse yet might somehow bend it to conform to what they believe – I think I was more disturbed by the idiots who thought I agreed that Midge was the spawn of Satan and should be pulled from shelves than the morons who thought it’s OK to portray pregnancy in a fake way and that as mother I shouldn’t tell my girls the “horrors” of pregnancy as I might scare them into never having children.
Of course the main problem about all of this is that some dude quoted me in an article about Midge and said it came from Epinions – so now all the fans from both sides knew where to find me. I guess I could understand that people reading just that one piece might get the wrong idea about me and where I stand on Midge (and by the way, I do appreciate all those non-member hits – if only I could cash in on them). They don’t know about my loathing of Mattel and the other 100 Barbie doll reviews I wrote – it’s almost like I’m misquoting myself if they only read that one Epinion.
As I pondered that, I began to think, why am I here to help others make informed buying decisions on toys that cost less than 20 bucks, or to write and have fun? I know my answer should be choice number 1, but I think number 2 suits me better. The I began to think long and hard – if that’s what I want to do, to write and have fun, how come I am so scared to highly rate others who choose to be more creative and less product oriented, why am I such a chicken to add them to my WOT – like a public admission to the guilty pleasure of enjoying writers who are less than conventional in their approach to reviews might result in a virtual stoning of me – like those who trust me might take it back if I openly admit to liking what I like.
So in a nutshell, that’s why I’m quitting Epinions – of course it’s nor quitting in the traditional sense of the word. I’m not quitting as in never reading, rating and writing again (although some might find that the more favorable alternative). It’s more like quitting the way I use to be and embracing the Epinioner I want to be – sort of like taking of my bra and dancing naked in the forest (so ok that’s a scary visual after 4 kids, but you get the idea).
It’s about not caring any more what others think about what I read and rate and just enjoying and admitting to taking the step across that invisible line I’m not suppose to cross. It’s about acknowledging the creativeness of others and trying to be creative myself. It’s about having fun, pulling my head out of my @ss and not taking myself too seriously. It’s a step many others should take – to stop fearing the unfamiliar and to begin appreciating the sheer creativity of other writers on this site.
Please it’s no longer about money – you’re only earning yourself an extra penny by keeping a creative writer down –back in 1999/2000 it was a different story and I can understand why some shut others down - you could lose big time income share. Now it just seems more petty and vindictive – I mean if you need a penny that much maybe you ought to be looking for a real job and not spending so much time at this site.
So sorry to say I’m not really quitting, I’m just hopefully improving myself (as a reader/rater and writer). Please, how could I quit with so many more Barbie dolls out there to bash? In fact Midge has a husband named Alan that I purchased today - maybe I can get Target to pull him off the shelf.
And don’t forget, there’s still time to sign up for the Pass the Pregnant Barbie Write-Off (see my profile page for details). Please feel free to e-mail me if you want to join in. Just keep in mind, according to many my little Epinion about Midge got her pulled off the shelf at Wal-Mart, so she must be worth writing about.
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Epinions.com ID:
ned1
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 - Top 100 |
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Member: Nancy
Location: in the Barbie aisle
Reviews written: 894
Trusted by: 347 members
About Me:
Off to Basel (1/21) - in search of Swiss Miss Barbie - back (1/26)
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