The Astronaut Farmer (2007): Houston, Billy Bob Has A Problem
Written: Mar 07 '07 (Updated Mar 07 '07)
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Product Rating:
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| Bang For The Buck |
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Pros: The photography, Virginia Madsen.
Cons: Much of the rest.
The Bottom Line: It looks good in the previews, but...
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| Ed.Williamson's Full Review: The Astronaut Farmer |
Sounds like an interesting idea. Some ordinary person wants to go up into space and be an astronaut. The government won’t let him ride on a shuttle, so he decides to buy a bunch of surplus military parts, build his own rocket, and go up into space on his own.
It might have been a great idea. As a story in a movie, that is. I can see a guy like Tom Hanks or maybe even Matthew McConaughey actually making us believe it could happen. But Billy Bob Thornton, even though he’s got the good ‘ol Texas country boy part down, and he can pull off the ex-fighter pilot part okay, can’t quite connect as a Mr. Rogers-style father nor with the gorgeous, heart-of-gold Virginia Madsen as his love interest. Billy Bob is a master of carrying around hurt in his eyes in a prune-faced demeanor, and some of that is needed in this story, but it doesn’t need to be his only expression through the whole blasted movie. Somewhere in here, an astronaut who makes it into space needs to have a pie-eating grin on his face like Dennis Quaid playing Gordon Cooper rocketing off the pad in 1983’s The Right Stuff. Come to think of it, Dennis might have even been a better choice in this role that Billy Bob. But Billy Bob is just ‘ol stone face all the way through. That may look good on a football coach’s face, but as a farmer/space jockey it don’t quite do it.
The Story
The story is pretty simple. Charles Farmer, a former jet fighter pilot and astronaut-in-training, had to let go his dream job of hoping to one day fly in space when his father committed suicide. He becomes a Texas farmer (Farmer the farmer…get it???) After being denied the chance to fly in space, he decides to buy old spare military surplus space program parts and build himself a replica of the historic Mercury-Atlas space rocket that flew the original 7 astronauts into suborbital and orbital flights back in the 1960s. He has a happy wife and a charming family of three healthy, rosy-cheeked children. He has lots of childhood friends in his small Texas town who all josh and kid around with him. The U.S. government is suspicious of him, however, and tries to stop his civilian space flight plans. I won’t tell you how it all comes out but let’s just say that the rest of the plot involves a death, an explosion, a severe communications problem between people, and a hard landing at one point. You connect the dots.
Notable Actors:
Billy Bob Thornton, playing “Charles Farmer”. Billy Bob, who played superbly, Oscar-caliber work even, as Permian High School’s Coach Gary Gaines in 2004’s blockbuster Friday Night Lights, fizzles here as the skyrocketing astronaut Farmer. Billy Bob is a fine actor within a certain zone, but this role is outside the lines for him.
Virginia Madsen, playing “Audrey ‘Audie’ Farmer” is great as Farmer’s wife, bringing her healthy, sunny, lively spirit once again to the screen as the beautiful but very smart blond mother-wife. But try as she can, there is very little chemistry she can ignite in her ‘ol stone face husband. One of the best parts of the movie is when she is confronted by an insipidly snippy Child Protective Services worker, who (as they, with their typically way overbalanced condemnatory power, typically do, unfortunately) tries to scare the bejabbers out of Audie, but Audie, innocent of all insinuations of course, discreetly holds her tongue, even though we know what she is thinking as she looks into the helmet-haired woman bureaucrat’s eyes.
Bruce Dern, playing “Hal”, Audie’s father does a fine job, underplaying his role as a supporting figure, and yet making an impression as a great character.
Bruce Willis, playing “The Colonel” has a minor role, but Willis is such a fine actor that even in a very tiny role he shines and is hard to miss.
My Evaluation
This is one of those might-have-been-fun movies that flame out on the launching pad. Part of it- a big part of it- is the miscasting of Billy Bob, a fine actor in other types of projects. This is like casting Robert De Niro or Brad Pitt as a simpering day-care worker, or casting Leonardo DiCaprio as an Arnold Schwarzenegger-style body builder. Give me a break, casting office. Billy Bob is good in his element, but this is not it.
Another problem is the story line. Not so much the plot, which is kinda cute, but the way the story line is directed in kind of like a series of vignettes that start, go, and come to an end. This is kind of the way made-for-TV movies are made so that when the commercial break comes the viewer is curious to see that the next vignette, or segment will hold until he is interrupted by a commercial (than heavens for DVRs). Thus what we end up with is a bunch of vignettes linked by an ambiguous line of suspense. We get to where we don’t really care if the astronaut blasts off into space or if his rocket hits the broad side of a barn. We don’t care if the bank forecloses and turns the farm into a new Super Wal-Mart or something. We don’t care if the F.B.I. agents lose their way in their sirens-blasting patrol cares and wind up in Juarez with the agents having a party with the local talent. In short, we are not really sure where the movie is going and if it is into space well take it there, and maybe don’t have a re-entry this time.
One part I really regretted is the lack of romantic chemistry between Madsen and her leading stone-man. Madsen is such a wonderful, appealing woman, straight out of the mold of all those wonderful French film actresses in the last century who could laugh and dance and take your breath away, that I hate to see her wasted in a film. Arghhh. This is like seeing a beautiful bouquet of flowers set out into sub-zero weather to quickly wilt. What a waste.
The children in the movie are cute and lovable but not memorable. They are just standard-issue sweet-kids, sort of like animatronic props. Okay, the boy stands out a little, but not much. I attribute this to the direction, and not to the kids. In the hands of more creative directing, at least one of the kids might have done something really different and distinctive, but here we have clones from a dullsville TV sitcom.
The story itself is preposterous, of course. No guy like Charles Farmer could ever bring together the resources to do what he is trying to do. Even brainy entrepreneurs like Richard Branson of Virgin Atlantic Airlines are interested in private space flight, and yet they (a) have gazillions of dollars for development, and (b) know that a TEAM is what succeeds, not some solo guy out in a Texas barn. A story does have to be credible, y’know. Unless you are deliberately selling it as a fantasy, like Narnia or something.
Even so, though, I do like the fact that the story is clean and wholesome and the actors try to do what they can with it. The photography is beautiful and the space special effects are done very well.
But as a movie that might have been, while this one will be entertaining to kids, for most of us it is a yawner. Next time get a guy like Hanks to play the kid friendly astronaut, and buff up the connection between the scenes and the direction.
And if you bring in Virginia Madsen again, that would be very okay too.
Two Stars/**
Recommended:
No
Movie Mood: Family Movie
Viewing Method: Other
Film Completeness: Rough cut, missing major effects, music, etc.
Worst Part of this Film: Pacing
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Ed.Williamson
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Member: Ed Williamson
Location: Way Out West, USA
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Wishing you a pleasant 2012, if the world doesn't end then (don't think so.)
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