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You HAVE GOT to be kidding meJun 10 '03 (Updated Jun 11 '03) Write an essay on this topic.
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The Bottom Line It's tough at first and financially demanding - but what an awesome experience it is to watch two beautiful humans grow and learn together!
When my husband and I were married, I already had two kids of my own from previous relationships and he had none of his own. It was often a topic of discussion whether we wanted to have another child or not. We wanted one together, but we weren't real sure whether we wanted to go through all of the financial, physical and emotional responsibilities that go along with having a child. Finally, we decided to go for it. A couple of weeks after I stopped taking birth control, I became pregnant. We were ecstatic! I called my Ob Gyn immediately, and she had me come in right away - I was only about 2 months along. The doctor had an ultrasound machine in her office and she attempted to view the fetus right there in her office! Unfortunately, she couldn't find anything, which left me feeling nervous. The doctor sent me to the local hospital to get an ultrasound with their more powerful machine. While performing the ultrasound, the technician began gasping and giggling and saying, "Oh, isn't that cute!" I asked her, "What?" and she said, "I don't know if I should tell you." I told her, "You can't sit there and giggle and say things and not tell me!" Then, she held up two fingers and said, "There's two." I thought the woman was taking some sort of illegal substance! Then, she pointed out two little heartbeats and I knew it was true. I called my husband immediately. I said, "Well, I had my ultrasound." He asked,"How is the baby?" to which I replied, "You mean, babIES." He just asked, "What.....?" He said that was the first time he ever about fell off of his chair after someone told him something. The next several months were a mixture of excitement, fear and anxiety. We were thrilled that we had two healthily developing babies, but, MY GOD - TWINS?!?!?!?!?!? Soon, we realized that having another baby, now that it was two, was going to be a lot of work and bring about a lot of changes. As I said, we already had two children. It didn't take long for us to realize that the Blazer and the Grand Prix we owned wouldn't fit our entire family - they would have been fine for three children, but not for four! We both refused to drive a minivan or a station wagon (I guess it is or one last attempt to hang on to our youth...) So, we bought a Durango. Now, almost 15 months later, we are wishing we would have broke down and bought the minivan so we would have more room to carry around all of the necessary baby equipment and so we could save money on gas. So far, with buying a new vehicle, the extra medical bills and the the extra baby supply bills, and the bed rest we refer to the second twin as the $20,000 baby. My pregnancy experience was a pretty positive one. Since I knew early on that I was having twins, my doctor had me coming in very often and she checked their progress with her ultrasound (she never again had a problem seeing them) often. Since my first two babies were premature (first baby was 9 weeks early, second baby was 6 weeks early) I was already considered high risk, adding on the fact that I was pregnant with twins, my doctor was very cautious. At around 6 months, my doctor put me on bedrest. I wasn't exhibiting any problems, but she wanted to take every precaution that she could. At about 7 months, my doctor tested me for contractions, though I wasn't feeling any. It turned out that I was having contractions, so my doctor put me on a medication that is primarily used for asthmatics. The medication relaxes smooth muscle tissue, thereby relaxing the muscles that bring about contractions. This medication seemed to work well for stopping my contractions, though my heartrate and blood pressure initially reacted very poorly. I ended up in the hospital for a couple of days while my body adjusted to the medication and I had to get up every three hours to take my pill. The babies still came 6 weeks prematurely. The first was delivered naturally, with his head first. The second was breach, which we knew going into the pregnancy, so the doctor just reached in, grabbed his feet and pulled him out! Since everything was already "opened up" from delivering the first baby, this really wasn't a big deal. The babies were born 5 minutes apart and they each weighed 5 1/2 pounds! A very good weight for even full term twins. Apparently, the medication that I took to prevent contractions also has a tendency to put weight on the babies. Furthermore, they were very healthy. In fact, they were more healthy than either of my previous children were at birth. The few months that followed were extremely hectic. Luckily, I have a wonderful, supportive husband. We both got up in the middle of the night to care for the babies. It reminded me of the days when I was a single mother with my other two babies, since I still was the sole care-taker of one twin while my husband cared for the other. Now that the twins are nearly 15 months old, things have become MUCH easier. My husband and I often go down memory lane about those first few months when sleeping was a luxury we could only dream of obtaining. Luckily, the babies started sleeping through the night at about 3 months and they started holding their own bottles at around 4 months (which made it much easier for only one person to feed both babies). Once they began to discover one another, having twins became an almost magical experience. I can't even begin to express the joy it is to watch them interact with one another - giggling, jabbering, wrestling, comforting, even fighting over sippy cups and toys. Here are some of the things that I have learned: * Don't buy a bunch of "cute" little outfits. You will need the money for diapers, formula and other accessories. Try to buy one piece outfits and buy PLENTY of sleepers. For the first 6 months or so, multiple piece outfits are too difficult to keep on your baby. You won't have the energy or the desire to try to keep these outfits on the babies! * Prepare bottles ahead of time and keep them in the fridge. Generally, there is no medical reason why babies need to have their bottles warmed. Train them early to drink cold formula and save yourself the trouble of heating up bottles. * If you have older children, make sure that they know they are still an important part of the family. Keep them involved in activities and keep yourself involved in those activities. The last thing you want is for them to feel jealousy toward your new arrivals or to feel as though they have been replaced. My 8 and 6 year old have still stayed involved in baseball, soccer, football and other activities. * Keep the babies on the same feeding and nap schedule. This will allow you to have small breaks, during which you can rest or prepare for the next feeding. This will also help to keep the babies on the same diapering schedule. * My twins were not born prematurely, but my first son was. The NICU (Neonatal intensive care unit) can be a scary place, but try to spend as much time holding and talking to your babies as possible. Research has shown that human touch helps premature/low-birth weight babies to improve more quickly. In fact, some NICU's assign nurses to cuddle and hold babies for just this reason. * Sleep the babies in the same crib, if there is enough room, for the first couple of months. I read several articles on this topic, and most experts agree that this is a source of comfort for multiples who just shared the past several months in the womb together. After they start becoming more mobile, you will want to separate them so they don't accidentally harm one another. An interesting tidbit of information: for some reason, the cries of one twin don't seem to wake the other. I have read this from many other parents of multiples, as well. * With bathing, my husband worked out a system. While I bathed the first baby, he undressed the second baby and prepared him for his bath. After I finished bathing the first baby, he handed me the second one and he went to work drying, lotioning, diapering and dressing the first baby. * Teach them to be independent as soon as possible. Encourage them to hold their own bottles. The sooner they do this, the easier feedings will become. * To all soon to be parents of multiples - it truly does get better and when it does, you will discover a magic and a world that only a few select parents are ever able to witness and to be a part of.  |
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