Christmas Is Never Really Over - My Top 10 Christmas MoviesJun 01 '05 Write an essay on this topic.
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The Bottom Line Ho Ho Ho. Merry Christmas.
I love my Christmas movies. Every year, I watch the same group, usually while under the pressure of an all day/all night marathon gift wrapping session. There's nothing like a flik, a drink, bundles of hallmark wrapping paper (with those nifty cutting lines), scissors that can cut buttah, and invisible tape. The damage you could do is limitless. Here, I recount for you, my ten favorite Christmas movies of all time. I'd be shocked if they weren't on your Top 10 list :). A Christmas Story (1983) Actors: Melinda Dillon, Darren McGavin, Peter Billingsley Director: Bob Clark Rating: PG I loved this movie before it was cool to love it :). Ralphie, now an adult, reflects back on his childhood, growing up in the 1940's in the coolest place in the world (Indiana). See boy (and friends) do stupid, kid things (i.e. freeze tongue on light pole, shoot bb guns, picking on little kids). See parents pass on their neurosis to their children so that other generations may benefit continually. Best quotes: My father worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. It was his true medium, a master. Aunt Clara had for years not only perpetually labored under the delusion that I was 4 years old, but also a girl. The line waiting to see Santa Claus stretched all the way back to Terre Haute. And I was at the end of it. I have since heard of people under extreme duress speaking in strange tongues. I became conscious that a steady torrent of obscenities and swearing of all kinds was pouring out of me as I screamed. Scrooged Actors: Bill Murray, Karen Allen, Bob Goldthwait, Carol Kane Director: Richard Donner Rating: PG-13 Many film makers have re-told the classic Charles Dickens story of Ebeneezer Scrooge. No one does it as good though as Bill Murray and Bob Goldthwait. This movie is laced with campy humor while at the same time, preserves that age-old message of appreciate life and what you have. Frank Cross: The b*tch hit me with a toaster. Frank Cross: Hey. Are you glad to see me, or is this a shotgun in your pocket? Frank Cross: I never liked a girl well enough to give her 12 sharp knives. It's A Wonderful Life (1946) Actors: James Stewart, Donna Reed, Lionel Barrymore Director: Frank Capra Rating: Equivalent of today's PG Man works hard all of his life to provide for his family and friends. Man becomes depressed and wants to die. Guardian angel arrives to show him that his life is valuable and that he has contributed so many positives to others lives. Nick: Hey look, mister - we serve hard drinks in here for men who want to get drunk fast, and we don't need any characters around to give the joint "atmosphere". Is that clear, or do I have to slip you my left for a convincer? Clarence: One man's life touches so many others, when he's not there it leaves an awfully big hole. Clarence: Remember, George: no man is a failure who has friends. National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation Actors: Chevy Chase, Beverly D'Angelo, Randy Quaid Director: Jeremiah S. Chechik Rating: PG-13 The Griswold family's plans for a big family Christmas turn into one disaster after another. Loads of humor. Loads of inside jokes that adults get and kids are oblivious to. Eddie: Every time Catherine would turn on the microwave, I'd p*ss my pants and forget who I was for about half an hour. Ellen: Clark, Audrey's frozen from the waist down. Clark: That's all part of the experience honey. Audrey: Do you sleep with your brother? Do you know how sick and twisted that is? Ellen: Well, I'm sleeping with your father. The Santa Clause (1994) Actors: Tim Allen, Wendy Crewson, Judge Reinhold, Eric Lloyd Director: John Pasquin Rating: PG Scott, a successful ad dude, accidentally kills Santa. He puts on the suit and ta dah! becomes the new man of the hour, only, he's in denial about all of it. At the same time, his ex-wife and her psychiatrist husband think that he's gone cuckoo. The little kid/son is the most sane of the group....serving as a reminder of why the season is so special to everyone. Little Elf Judy: Seeing isn't believing. Believing is seeing. Scott Calvin: You know, you look pretty good for your age. Little Elf Judy: Thanks, but I'm seeing someone in wrapping. Dr. Neil Miller: Scott, what was the last thing you and Charlie did, before you went to bed Christmas Eve? Scott Calvin: We shared a bowl of sugar, did some shots of brown liqour, played with my shot guns, field-dressed a cat, looked for women. Home Alone (1990) Actors: Macaulay Culkin, Joe Pesci, Daniel Stern, John Heard, Catherine O'Hara Director: Chris Columbus Rating: PG Remember when Macaulay was cute...single...not associated to Michael Jackson...? Here's a story of a kid lost in the sea of a family with lots of kids. It's the holidays. He smarts off to his mom and gets sentenced to the attic the night before the entire family is supposed to take off for a trip. He gets left behind (accidentally) and we watch as he faces the holiday alone in his big ole house... Kevin: This house is so full of people it makes me sick. When I grow up and get married, I'm living alone. Kevin: Did anyone order me a plain cheese? Buzz McCallister: Yeah we did, but if you want any someones gonna have to barf it all up cuz' it's gone. Megan: You're not at all worried that something might happen to Kevin? Buzz McCallister: No, for three reasons: A, I'm not that lucky. Two, we use smoke detectors and D, we live on the most boring street in the whole United States of America, where nothing even remotely dangerous will ever happen. Period. Miracle on 34th Street (1947) Actors: Natalie Wood, Maureen O'Hara, Edmund Gwenn, John Payne Director: George Seaton Rating: Equivalent of G Is there a Santa or is the man that works in Macy's every year just a great actor? Find out as he goes to court to prove who he is while at the same time, working his magic on three very special people. Fred Gailey: Faith is believing when common sense tells you not to. Don't you see? It's not just Kris that's on trial, it's everything he stands for. It's kindness and joy and love and all the other intangibles. Kris Kringle: You know what the imagination is? Susan Walker: Oh, sure. That's when you see things, but they're not really there. Kris Kringle: Well, that can be caused by other things, too. The Simpsons Christmas Special (1989) Actors: Dan Castellaneta, Julie Kavner, Nancy Cartwright, Yeardley Smith, Harry Shearer, Hank Azaria Director: David Silverman Rating: Unrated 1989 was a great year. The Simpsons Christmas Special finally debut and Sunday evenings would never be the same in our household. Homer isn't having a great holiday season. No Christmas bonus. The second job pays peanuts. The in-laws are a pain in the neck and the neighbors are just plain show-offs. What kind of Christmas can The Simpsons expect to have? Marge: Okay, Kids, give me your letters and I'll mail them to Santa at the North Pole. Bart: Oh please, there's only one fat guy who brings us presents and his name ain't Santa. Bart: Hey, Santa, what's shaking, Man? Homer: Um, what's your name, Bart... Ner? Uh, little partner? Bart: I'm Bart Simpson, who the hell are you? Homer: I'm jolly old Saint Nick. Homer: Aah! Thirteen bucks? Hey, wait a minute! Clerk: That's right. One hundred and twenty dollars gross, less social security, less unemployment insurance, less Santa training, less costume purchase, less beard rental, less Christmas club. See you next year. Frosty The Snowman Actors: Jimmy Durante, Jackie Vernon, Paul Frees Director: Jules Bass and Arthur Rankin Jr. Rating: Today's equivalent of G Of all of the Christmas movies/shows, this is the one that reminds me of love and goodness. I cry every single time that Frosty melts. It's like losing a friend. I clap with joy every time he is brought back to life. It's a reminder that relationships are fragile and time-boxed and must be appreciated in the here and now. Frosty: Happy birthday! Frosty: Whew! Stay in here much longer and I'll really make a splash in the world. Santa Claus: Don't cry, Karen, Frosty's not gone for good. You see, he was made out of Christmas snow and Christmas snow can never disappear completely. It sometimes goes away for almost a year at a time and takes the form of spring and summer rain. But you can bet your boots that when a good, jolly December wind kisses it, it will turn into Christmas snow all over again. Rudolph The Rednosed Reindeer Actors: Burl Ives, Billie Mae Richards, Paul Soles Director: Kizo Nagashima and Larry Roemer Rating: Equivalent of today's G I'm telling you - those Bass Rankin folks really know how to get to kids (sort of like the Schoolhouse Rock folks). In Rudolph, you get a delightful, clay animation story, along with lessons of tolerance, love, and acceptance. Sure makes you think twice about picking on someone who is different from you. Yukon Cornelius: Fog's as thick as peanut butter. Hermey: You mean pea soup. Yukon Cornelius: You eat what you like and I'll eat what I'll like. King Moonraiser: A toy is never truly happy until it is loved by a child. A Charlie Brown Christmas (1965) Actors: Lots of Uncredited People Director: Bill Melendez Rating: Equivalent of today's G Way before the invention of vcr's and dvd players, there was good ole, straight television. Every holiday season I would arrange my entire life around the airing of Charlie Brown and his friends. I admired Linus for his insights (musical and otherwise). I most identified with Lucy (of course!). Watching the gang look for ways to find the meaning of Christmas never gets old. In fact, every year, I grow to appreciate the humor just a little bit more... Sally: All I want is what I have coming to me. All I want is my fair share. Linus: Maybe Lucy's right. Of all the Charlie Browns in the world, you are the Charlie Browniest. Lucy: Look, Charlie, let's face it. We all know that Christmas is a big commercial racket. It's run by a big eastern syndicate, you know. Linus: I didn't know it was such a bad little tree. It's not bad at all, really. Maybe all it needs is a little love.  |
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