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Surrealist write-off.. right-off?(Part of Schlamozzel's Surrealist W/O)Feb 13 '04 (Updated Feb 18 '04) Write an essay on this topic.
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The Bottom Line Ok.. I'll play. Here's my contribution to Schlamozzel's Surrealist W/O
1) If 1 plus 1 = 2, then how much does 2 plus 1 =? A: 2 Poppadoms, and a carton of Raita dip. 2) At this very moment Gerald and Raymond are on the equator at the international date line and begin traveling east at a speed of 472 kilometers per hour (hey, I have to think global here). Accounting for the speed in which the earth rotates how long will it take until they reach the exact point from which they began their journey and will they be there yesterday or today? A: Oh Sweet Moses and the Israelites, wrap me in swaddling clothes and call me Obediah. 3) How do you like your eggs cooked? A: Belgium, Belgium? 4) Which automobile manufactured in the 1920's would you prefer to own? A: Look Ma!, no hands! 5) Is there snow atop Mt. Everest or is it ice? A "The cow in the meadow goes "Moo!", the cow in the meadow goes "Moo!", then the farmer comes along, wacks him on the head and grinds him up, and that's how we get hamburrrrrrgerrrrrrs!". 6) Sarah has 5 apples. Judy has 2 pears. Maude has 6 kiwi fruit. Which one of these statements is unlike the other two. A: Grumpy, Happy and Sleepy, being mauled to death by midgets? For shame! 7) Name 3 provinces in China. A: Edward Woodward was so named, after his mother laboriously contemplated a suitable onomatopoeic word for the sound a fart makes when dispensed in water. 8) Who composed the 1812 Overture? A: Polly put the kettle on... silly cow, kettle hats are soooo last season. 9) How many cards are in a deck of cards used to play poker? A: I must go to Moscow, to Moscow I must go, where moss grows and cows moo, I must go to Moscow. 10) Given a choice of orange juice, lemonade, or pineapple juice which would you prefer? A: Crab  |
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