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A Response to the Masses, BABE, definedJul 17 '04 (Updated Jul 19 '04) Write an essay on this topic.
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The Bottom Line BABE, ya gotta love her even if you hate her.
my response to the last one I wrote was... wowee by Nini23 a lotta comments. yeah i was having a night of pure johnny rotten angst. fed up with this society in san diego i decided to write an epinion on my non babe ness. it is okay to laugh, the babe word is funny. i also find it interesting that some women chose to respond to this epinion with some deep comments on neanderthal men, haven't heard that term in a while. thanks for all your advice. i will try developing "myself from the inside out" and not basing my babeness through the beer bottle idea. truth is, come on now, you know there is some truth in this essay and that is why we fight against it. nini23 read on... WHAT IS BABE? no, not the pig silly... STUDIES BY SCIENTISTS SAY.. Most people find symmetry attractive, they say. Then there is the whole hip to waist ratio thing see here... http://www.keepmedia.com/pubs/PsychologyToday/2001/07/01/8457?page=2but, plainly, studies seem to point towards an evolving species that has more b alls than brains it is true a dude likes a babe better than a non babe? Of course and here is why they do and female non babes don't... PART UNO "I've Got You Babe...no I don't" Babe, she is the uber babe..yeah you can laugh. Okay think Catherine Zeta Jones, think Blondie in her hay day, think Patricia Arquette. What makes them babes? DNA, baby, DNA. I have this saying, "Hey who gave all the good DNA to Catherine Zeta Jones when I was born?" Come on now, even gay men would love to be her friend on looks alone. Now babes may sniffle, they may say "I have it hard I have no friends that are girls" blah blah blah. Let me tell you why, we hate you. I am kidding, you hate us. Okay, it is a mutual give and take hate situation. Some of the babes of the world don't like other women because women don't kiss their a s s like men do on a regular basis. We see you as equals with an advantage: manipulative, greedy little full-of-yourselves with great hair. We would love to have your hair or cut it off but we know secretely that you would still be considered hot if you shaved your head and became a monk. We hate that... Of course you are going to hate us! We don't want to go to bed with you so we aren't going to kneel down and pray to you either, unlike the men who pursue you. We see through the bullsh it and basically say, "so what?" We don't want to boost your ego any more than it has already been boosted (by rockets) and hey, since we do most things alone, we don't really need your company as much as you need someones. We want to say "Dare to be independant, girl". OR at least, "hey don't bum a cigarette from a dude just cuz you can". With all this babeness given to the babes of the world, how many babes do you really know who are genuine loners ready to conquer the world solo> I mean really, who are we kidding? Would you do things solo either if you had people wanting to feed you grapes as you walk on the beach? I didn't think so. PART DEUS "Beauty fades but true love lasts forever, babe" You've read this far and you are either laughing or want to kill me by now. Who made me the authority of babedom? NO ONE. Maybe I am just jealous again? YES I AM. Do I care? NO. The history of the BABE: Babe was born out of confusion. Like an albino rat, the babe is a freak of nature mainly congregating in San Diego, California, along the beach. Babe was created when two average looking humans of the species "forgetmenot" got together and created "this ugly baby". "This ugly baby" was really, really ugly. However, as it grew "this ugly baby: flowered into babedom and left all the pretty babies crying in their jammies. "This ugly baby" had become an uber babe. See the parents, well they always thought "this ugly baby" was adorable, with her big head and her spaghetti arms-- so much so that other parents would lie to the forgetmenot species and agree, "Oh yes your baby is beautiful". Pretty soon "this ugly baby"'s DNA morphed into what was heard (see previous sentence) and the rest was history...BABE WAS BORN. The ultimate demise of BABE. The only glimmering shimmer of hope about the BABE is that sometimes she gets ugly as she ages, not well. Unless the BABE is a genuine BABE, BABES do not really age all that well. BABES tend to get heavier, wrinkly, or withered. They end up looking like "this ugly baby" with every birthday a little more. Nonetheless, because they were raised with the babe esteem, they are not as prey to self-loathing as say nerds, geeks, or losers. Inside they still think they are babes, and let's face it, it is what is on the inside that counts (this last sentence denotes sarcasm; this note added for epinion members who take this too seriously). PART TROIS "God Save the Queens" In rejection of all this BABEDOM, another species came out of survival of the fittest called the DRAG Queen. The drag queen dared to elevate what babe is to its craziest level. It dared to say "Hey girl, I is better a woman than you is,oook?" and, gave the babe the slap in the face she deserved. In addition the drag queen dared to threaten the male idea of what is hot and brought the idea of BABE to a most confusing level. Especially with the invention of RuPaul. She is not a babe, she is a he babe was overheard in various movies and songs in the 1990's and hence, the idea of BABE was attributed to the au natural babe more commonly than those with make up. This reaction, in turn, made all women who weren't babes in the first place hate BABE even more. BABE didn't have to wear makeup or a bra and still she was a babe. Hip to waist ratio wise, babe never had much of a problem, eagerly showing off her small non child bearing hips and flattened pierced belly, BABE was a magnet for men ready to pounce. The rest of us growled and simmered and hated BABE all the way through her stupid evolution, and that was the worst part, BABE even had a higher GPA than us. Dam nit BABE "Why can't I be you?" by the CURE was sung on the radio and all the non-babes knew what that meant...plastic surgery was on the upswing. IN Conclusion I have no conclusion, the truth is, there is more to those than meets the eye but until our society really holds this truth to be self-evident , I'll go back in the garage.  |
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