Take a creaky old farmhouse in Nowhere, North Dakota, a bunch of crows, a white collar worker who doesn't know the first thing about farming, a stain on the wall that won't go away, a teen-age girl with a history of emotional illness, and what do you get? You get a really dumb horror movie called The Messengers.

Dylan McDermott plays the hunky Dad, a guy who just wants to get back to basics and grow, um, what is this guy growing anyway? Sunflowers? Corn? Does it matter? The point is, there are crows all over the place, and before you know it, a way too nice John Corbett appears out of nowhere and is immediately given a job as a hired hand. Good thing too, because Dylan McDermott couldn't so much as keep a philodendron alive if it were made out of plastic. Corbett gets the farm on track, bonds with the family, then turns out to be psychopath, drat the luck.

Meanwhile, Kristen Stewart, who plays The Troubled Daughter, just Knows Something Is Wrong, but of course, No One Will Listen to Her. Penelope Ann Miller is completely wasted on a role that amounts to little more than whining and snapping at Dad and daughter, and trying unsuccessfully to scrub a spot off the wallpaper. It is an ominous spot though, and did I mention there are also crows? Yes, lots of crows.

Without spoiling the ending, I will grant that in the final scene there are some icky special effects in the basement that are kind of fun to watch. And everybody does live happily ever after (except the psychopath and possibly the crows). But the bottom line is, lots of crows and every Gothic cliche in the book isn't enough to create a good movie. The good actors are saddled with an idiotic script and stupid plot, and the only surprises are the kind that jump out from behind doors and go "Boo!"

Fans of the genre will be very disappointed.



Recommended: No

Movie Mood: Scary Movie
Viewing Method: Other
Film Completeness: Looked complete to me.
Worst Part of this Film: Script