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Re: ok Gary... (Reply to this comment)
by garym
Hi Doc,
Perceptive you are.
Blowing off some steam from some bumps in the road.
I just might take you up on the offer one of these days.
I appreciate it.
Gary
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Feb 01 '05
12:02 pm PST
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ok Gary... (Reply to this comment)
by drdevience
This raised my shrink alert a tad...
All well in the land down south..? Email me if you wanna chat..
.. ummm after you make poop.
Doc
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Jan 29 '05
6:07 pm PST
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Re: ! ! (Reply to this comment)
by garym
Hi Tim,
I guess I m a regular (or constipated) Raspoopin.
Yeah, that bowel talk draws em like flies. Pun intended.
Later,
Gary
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Jan 17 '05
8:22 am PST
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! ! (Reply to this comment)
by tdswift89
Thanks Linda,
Think of me next time you pinch one and I ll die a happy man.
You say this Gary and get an "Oh God I'll be thinking about you". . . If I tried that I'd probably get a slap in the face and a restraining order. Just on emore reason you're "the man". I'm not bull-pooping either. .
Tim S
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Jan 16 '05
7:11 pm PST
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Re: Re: Re: Korn in the poop (Reply to this comment)
by garym
Throw in a Bolivian transvestite and a tin of sardines and you ve got a deal.
Gary
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Jan 08 '05
6:58 am PST
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Re: Re: Korn in the poop (Reply to this comment)
by oldcomixfan
How about 20 re-makes of old rock'n roll classics transcribed for a seven-string guitar tuned down to a bowel-rumbling low F flatulance accompanied by some primal screams instead of the push ups?
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Jan 07 '05
8:37 pm PST
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Re: Re: Huh? (Reply to this comment)
by pooch2
enuf alredee.
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Jan 07 '05
1:43 pm PST
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Re: Huh? (Reply to this comment)
by garym
Hi Pooch,
All I can say is that I hope you don t work at the sanitation department.
Oh, my renal remedy had a glitch. Farts! It stands to reason, or sits to resonate, that farts can be every bit as profundo.
Quick solution: A bung hole cover, also installed
(in stalled, get it? I m too much......I mean it, I m too much) at birth. I ll leave the details to my crack team at the Bung Hole INC Labs, rear oriface, I mean office.
Gary
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Jan 07 '05
1:39 pm PST
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: What's up with this corn and poop thing? (Reply to this comment)
by artemisadorned
Will do Gary. Oh, God how I'll be thinking of you!
Blessings and regularity,
Linda
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Jan 07 '05
12:45 pm PST
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Huh? (Reply to this comment)
by pooch2
Turns out this may be the mother of your invention, Gary.
I mentioned my comments to people around the office. Contgary to my belief, there are people who are put off by their own putrids.
Perhaps I'm just one of those people who thinks "his s__t don't stink".
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Jan 07 '05
8:51 am PST
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: What's up with this corn and poop thing? (Reply to this comment)
by garym
Thanks Linda,
Think of me next time you pinch one and I ll die a happy man.
Gary
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Jan 06 '05
7:35 pm PST
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Re: Smells okay (Reply to this comment)
by garym
Hey Pooch,
That is an interesting concept. I ve been digesting the idea for a few hours. I ve thought about toilet windows so you can stick your head outside, the neighbors would always comment the morning after you had Mexican, "Fred s been hitting Taco Bell again."
Or having your azz vacuum sealed to the pot.
Or at birth, every child is fitted with a heavy duty elastic bung hole that attaches to a vacuum tube. You can use it anywhere.
Or every toilet is equipt with an overhead oxygen container with washable or replaceable mask. Just like the airlines. Every house would have giant refillable oxygen tanks at the side of the house.
That kind of stuff.
Gary
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Jan 06 '05
7:33 pm PST
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Re: Re: Re: Re: What's up with this corn and poop thing? (Reply to this comment)
by artemisadorned
So glad to have made your acquaintance gentle Sir. You do crack me up! I'm now looking for a splendid big job. Hope that's not just a colloquialism! My relationship with the commode is forever changed, thanks to you.
Potty humor at its best is you.
~Linda
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Jan 06 '05
6:24 pm PST
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Re: Re: Re: Re: yup (Reply to this comment)
by pooch2
Can't stand anybody else's, but your own never bothers you. Yes, it stinks and can be foul as hell, but it never bothers you. Imagine if it did and you couldn't stand it. What a funny world that would be. Honey, would you please come in here with the Lysol? I'm gagging.
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Jan 06 '05
11:42 am PST
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Re: Re: Re: yup (Reply to this comment)
by garym
Hi Lanny the uncanny,
I once waved a stinking-azz fart over to my table during the Christmas party, but my boss ignored me as usual, thanks be to God, amen.
Gary
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Jan 06 '05
10:21 am PST
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Re: You amaze me (Reply to this comment)
by garym
Hi Letta,
No , my sweet critters were not the subject. I couldn t get angry at them.
Baby poop is always the best because they NEVER chew 17 times before swallowing. Sometimes they swallow 17 times before chewing.
Later,
Gary
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Jan 06 '05
10:17 am PST
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Re: Re: Re: What's up with this corn and poop thing? (Reply to this comment)
by garym
Hi Linda,
You know the Kings, Wingdings, Poohbahs, Potantates, etc. used to have people on staff that made their livings by pondering over the royal rump residue.
Not the worst career path. Though your on duty 24/7, your actually "on duty" once or twice a day. Just make sure your royal duty isn t at White Castle.
I go gag now.
Gary
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Jan 06 '05
10:12 am PST
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Re: Re: yup (Reply to this comment)
by rated-r
Well, you are the master of the art of shitting! Now, if you can only described the aroma. Have you ever waved a stinking-ass fart toward your nose, just to see how nasty it was!
Then after you breathed it in said, "That's a good one."
Lanny
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Jan 05 '05
10:42 pm PST
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You amaze me (Reply to this comment)
by grandgram
Poetry becomes you and I enjoyed the read. I remember the corn&poop during all my changing diapers of five wee ones. Is this what brought forth your great verse? The twins must give you plenty to write about. :-)
Letta
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Jan 05 '05
1:20 pm PST
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Re: Re: What's up with this corn and poop thing? (Reply to this comment)
by artemisadorned
Me, I m more of an asstoot man.
I do think so highly of you! ...Pondering the stuff life is made of. I'll have to take a closer look at mine!
Linda~
peering deeply into the commode
seeing my reflection?
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Jan 05 '05
11:05 am PST
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Re: Ah Poo.. (Reply to this comment)
by garym
Hi Barbara,
Iwas going to co0mment on your great taste, but this might be a questionable forum. I am glad you liked it, though.
Gary
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Jan 05 '05
9:56 am PST
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Re: I Am Laughin' (Reply to this comment)
by garym
Hi Virginia,
A little corny at the end, a little corny in the end, a little corny out the end.
A little bit country, a little bit corn and peanuts.
Your Arthur
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Jan 05 '05
9:55 am PST
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Re: What's up with this corn and poop thing? (Reply to this comment)
by garym
Hi Linda,
Your father was an astute man. Me, I m more of an asstoot man.
I have always been confounded by the presence of whole, untouched corn pods, devoid of the meat and filled with poop. It s like there are little men inside of me carefully shoveling out the corn, while a second group loads the empty shell to the brim. Some day I would like to thank those men.
Gary
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Jan 05 '05
9:47 am PST
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Re: Korn in the poop (Reply to this comment)
by garym
"amaizing"!!!!!!
Okay Mr Ocie, now you´ve stepped over the line. All this corn talk. This is going to end up being a regular, or constipated, Cob web page.
Drop and give me 20.
Gary
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Jan 05 '05
9:40 am PST
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Re: good good (Reply to this comment)
by garym
Hello BF,
Not exactly true. Check out E! for "Slaughtered Mercilessly: Behind the scenes, pt II".
Glad you liked it, though.
Gary
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Jan 05 '05
9:35 am PST
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Re: yup (Reply to this comment)
by garym
Hi Lanny,
Add some unchewed carrots and beets and you have the makings of a master piece of shi t
Gary
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Jan 05 '05
9:30 am PST
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Ah Poo.. (Reply to this comment)
by LILvoyce
Brilliant as always..
-barbara
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Jan 05 '05
5:07 am PST
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I Am Laughin' (Reply to this comment)
by Granniemose
I always get a kick out of dark humor, and your poem is great - although it did get a bit corny at the end (Pun intended? No, not really.)
Virginia
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Jan 04 '05
8:53 pm PST
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What's up with this corn and poop thing? (Reply to this comment)
by artemisadorned
You know my dad has a thing about corn too. He made us (as little kids) chew it forever before swallowing. Afraid we'd get gastric pains or appendicitis or something. Humm, thanks for the memories, Gary. Cool poem by the way. I hope you write us some more.
~Linda~
Still chewing on this one.
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Jan 04 '05
10:46 am PST
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Korn in the poop (Reply to this comment)
by oldcomixfan
Now that would be amaizing and explain the strange noises in the plumbing. har har
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Jan 04 '05
10:14 am PST
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