You Wouldn't Happen To Have Any Relatives In Los Angeles, Would You?
Jan 05 '05
The Bottom Line Was I really this crazy at one time?............Am I still!?!
Remember back in early 2001 when Epinions.com was undergoing one of its extreme makeovers and we needed somewhere else to express ourselves so that we wouldn't end up exploding from all of those amazing thoughts collecting inside of us with no place to go?
One of our outlets was a place called Brightidea.com, and it was Kassie who directed me there.
One of the many pieces I posted there is the one I'm sharing with you now.
It found its way online on January 14, 2001--one day before the last earthly birthday of Hard_To_Please (though most of us didn't know then that it was the day before his birthday, and none of us knew that we would be saying "Goodbye!" to him that October 9).
All I can say is, as I read this piece, has it really been nearly four years since I posted it--and will it really be five years since I arrived at Epinions.com this coming June!?!
Time flies when you're having fun!
Anyway, enjoy (and/or gag over) the memories!!!
You Wouldn't Happen To Have Any Relatives In Los Angeles, Would You?
Uncle Kermit's a pretty open-minded sort of guy. However, there are still some things in life that make his skin crawl and/or makes him wish that the floor would swallow him up.
Like this time last fall when we were eating at Bloomington, Indiana's Irish Lion.
This adorable--and I DO mean ADORABLE!!!--waiter comes up to take our order.
I'm about to melt into a puddle of tiger-butter just from looking at him.
At this point, Uncle Kermit's stomach is probably tightening up into knots as he watches me fixating my very best stare on this studmuffin like I'm going to find out all about him and stalk him or something.
Either that or else ask if he were on the menu so that he could stay at our table so I could stare at him and drool all over myself.
Uncle Kermit knows me pretty well, so he could tell just by the loopy expression his off-the-wall niece was getting on her face that he might have to ask for a doggie bag so he could cut holes for his eyes, nose, and mouth in it and don it like a mask.
Uh-oh! Uncle Kermit's worst nightmare was coming true--AGAIN!!!
"You wouldn't happen to have any relatives in LA, would you?" I asked the waiter while super-gluing my eyes on his face.
"Not that I know of," he replied--which, at that point, I began to describe the person to him that he reminded me of, adding that, if this guy ever ran for President of the United States, to be sure to remember his name and vote for him. His name (that is, the name of the fellow he reminded me of) must have floated out of my mouth a minimum of two or three times.
"You really do look like (name of guy mentioned)," I added. "Right down to your, cute, little mouth!"
This easy-on-the-eyes waiter returned to our table at different times to see if there were anything we needed--and was very gracious in spite of being greeted with a loopy look from me each time.
After we had finished eating, Uncle Kermit took out some bills to leave the tip.
"I think I'll leave him a very generous tip, because he certainly earned it at THIS table!" Uncle Kermit said. "By the way, didn't you tell him that he had a cute, little mouth?"
I nodded while continuing to look loopy.
"In that case. . ." Uncle Kermit took out about three more bills and added them to the tip!
One final note...To visit this piece of insanity in its original environment, go here:
http://www.brightidea.com/ob_view_idea.asp?idea_id={7A46CEA1-D9BA-4EBA-AF55-64F6CAF19B2A}&bucket_id=
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Epinions.com ID:
AinsleyJo
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Member: Ainsley Jo Phillips
Location: Anderson, Indiana
Reviews written: 270
Trusted by: 221 members
About Me:
I'm hosting a write-off: http://www.epinions.com/content_5362983044
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