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Feedback Needed for the Beginnings of a NovelFeb 04 '05 Write an essay on this topic.
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The Bottom Line The beginnings of a novel geared toward a teenage audience.
This is the beginnings of what I hope will turn into a novel eventually. It is geared toward a teenage audience but I am looking for feedback from all age ranges. -------------------------------------------------------------- As Ivy lay alone in her assigned room with only the ticking of the wall clock to break the silence, she prayed for way to avoid the events planned for the next day. Despite the fact that she had been in this situation twenty one times in her seventeen years of life, desperation was setting in, she could never seem to get used to the thought of going through it again. Resigned to the fact that her nerves wouldn't let her rest Ivy decided to call Nurse Fischer in to get her something to help her sleep, just as she was reaching for the call button the telephone rang. She tentatively reached for it, being sure not to entangle herself in her I.V. " Hello " " Ivy it's Dani, how are you feeling hon? " "I'm fine you know I'm a veteran at this, I've been through this so many times I could probably perform the operation on myself." Ivy said with a giggle and was surprised how convincing her confidence sounded. Dani was Ivy's closest friend and confidant and she felt an overwhelming need to protect her from the reality of the situation and prevent any undue worry. "Has the prom theme been decided yet?" "Yeah, Night of Enchantment or something like that" Dani laughed openly at the genericness of it all. "I heard that Stephen Valero was planning to ask you to go with him." Dani said with a mock sigh, then began to laugh hysterically. " Oh, please, Stephen with a PH, he's so arrogant, but he may be my only hope of going to the prom. Where did you hear that he was going to ask me???" Ivy asked flatly. "Olivia Wallace told me." well at least you got your information from a reliable source" Ivy laughed" you know how she is Dani, she is constantly starting rumors." "I know, I should know better than to listen to her. Do you know when you will be back in school? You recovered pretty quickly last time." " No, I'm hoping I will recover fairly quickly this time too but I'm not betting on it." Ivy answered wistfully, she had learned at a young age to avoid trying to predict when she would be back on her feet after something like this. They were going to be doing surgery on her leg again and the projected recovery time was considerable. Ivy's mind began to drift into thoughts of going back to school, while most teens loathed having to sit through classes Ivy craved it, it was one of the only times she felt like she was living a normal life, that and when she spent time with Dani. "Ivy, are you still there?" "Huh, what???" "Where were you?" Dani asked, although she already knew the answer to that question. " I feel like I'm talking to myself" Dani knew full well why Ivy was so preoccupied. Ivy did her best to hide her fear but it didn't work with Dani. She knew Ivy better than Ivy knew herself. "I'm sorry" I think I'm starting to drag a little, I should get a little shut-eye. "Well I'll let you go and rest, I'll see you tomorrow. Bye" Dani hung up before Ivy could protest her being there for the surgery. Dani never missed one and Ivy never missed trying to talk her out of being there, this time she wasn't giving her the opportunity. Ivy hung up the phone and reached for her call button, she still needed something to help her sleep, she was back in the room alone with only the clock for company. Nurse Fischer quietly opened the heavy door and made her way to Ivy's bedside. She had been an employee of the hospital longer than the seventeen years Ivy had been a patient and she always seemed to know what Ivy needed without her ever having to ask. "What can I do for you Miss Ryan?" she asked with a smile, as she took the small pills out of her pocket and handed them to Ivy. "I always knew you were a mind reader" Ivy giggled as she swallowed both pills simultaneously. "Can I get you anything else Ivy?" "No I'm fine now thank you." "If you need anything else I'll be here all night." Nurse Fischer said as she walked across the room and back out the door. She had no idea how comforting those words were to Ivy, and she longed to ask her to stay until she fell asleep. More often than not she felt as if she were alone there,simply known as just another ailment listed in a chart. The pills began to take effect quickly and Ivy could feel herself drifting off to sleep, however that night was anything but restful for her. Everytime she rolled over in bed her IV would pull a little and pain would shoot up her arm. “This is ridiculous!” she thought. Frustrated,she rolled slowly onto her left side and rested her right arm in front of her. It seemed to be the only position that didn’t cause her pain. “Miss Ryan”…”Miss Ryan”… she could feel Nurse Fischer shaking her gently but deliberately kept her eyes closed continuing to ignore the efforts being made to awaken her. “Miss Ryan”…finally realizing that Nurse Fischer had no intention of giving up,she opened her eyes. “Can I help you?” she muttered quietly. “Sorry to disturb you but it’s time for your medication.” Nurse Fischer said with a smile. “And what medication might that be” Ivy asked. Nurse Fischer tried to hide her amusement at the question. “It’s time for your sleeping pills Ivy.” She knew how much Ivy hated being awakened to take medication to make her sleep. “Wouldn’t it serve the same purpose just to let me sleep and then give them to me when I wake up?” Ivy asked. “That would seem more logical wouldn’t it, unfortunately you know that isn’t how things are done.” Nurse Fischer answered. “And why break with tradition right?” Ivy said sarcastically as she took the pills from Nurse Fischer’s hand and swallowed them. “What time is it anyway”. Nurse Fischer looked down at her watch, “It’s 3 am”,”they’ll be taking you in about four hours”. “Thanks,could you leave the door open a little?” Ivy asked as she leaned back against her pillow. “No problem” Nurse Fischer said as she made her way back out to the nurse’s station.  |
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