The Pirates who Don't do Anything Didn't do anything for me
Written: Jun 09 '08 (Updated Jun 09 '08)
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Product Rating:
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| Bang For The Buck |
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Pros: Monkey Girl enjoyed it
Cons: Bob the Tomato was reduced to a cameo
The Bottom Line: Okay movie -- it's better at a Vacation Bible School
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| jnbmoore's Full Review: The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything:A VeggieTales Mo... |
We are the pirates who don’t do anything
We just stay at home and lie around
And if you ask us to do anything
We'll just tell you we don’t do anything
Hubby and I have been watching Veggie Tales since before Monkey Girl was born. We attended a Bible study in Taipei, Taiwan which was 90 minutes from our home. Our wonderful hosts allowed us to camp out in their guest room afterwards so I could go to the woman’s group the next morning and Hubby could go to his company’s main office.
One night after the kids had gone to bed, our wonderful hosts put on this children’s video. It featured a tomato and a cucumber and other veggies who talked and sang silly songs. They also told Bible stories in a way that had us four adults laughing. We were immediately hooked and have purchased or seen most of the videos in the series. We loved how they always kept their eye on God.
Well I’ve never been to Greenland
And I've never been to Denver
And I’ve never buried treasure in St. Louie or St. Paul
This is Vacation Bible School week at the church my daughter attends AWANA at. I usually help out at this VBS. This year the theme is The Pirates who don’t do Anything. As we had not seen the movie yet, we decided to go to the summer movie program at our local theatre. One of our movie choices was this movie. So after VBS was over, Monkey Girl and I ran over to see the film.
And I’ve never been to Moscow
And I’ve never been to Tampa
And I’ve never been to Boston in the fall
The story starts in the 17th century. Pirates are battling a young prince Alexander and his soldiers aboard an old boat. The evil pirate, Robert the Terrible, captures Alexander and wants his sister Eloise. He does not find her aboard and leaves with Alexander to his secret lair.
Eloise and her butler were hiding on the boat. They know they can’t stop Robert the Terrible and they need help. The King had left Eloise a ball to use in mortal danger. She tells the ball she needs “Heroes” to help save her and her brother.
Meanwhile in the present, Elliot who is scared of everything on his list (Larry the Cucumber), Sedgewick who is extremely lazy (Mr. Lunt) and George who has neither confidence nor respect (Pa Grape) are all working at a pirate themed dinner theatre. Even though they all dream of being on stage; they currently work at cabin boys serving the customers.
A blind green onion makes an odd prophecy which confuses on trio of pirates. The ball finds them and they find themselves on a row boat in the middle of the sea. They soon must decide if they are going to do the right thing or are going to revert to form and do nothing.
Along the way they meet cheese curls with teeth, rock monsters, and pirates everywhere.
And I’ve never hoist the main sail
And I’ve never swabbed the poop deck
And I’ve never veer to starboard
'Cause I never sail at all
This was a really odd Veggie Tales movie. God’s name was never mentioned at all. It was not based on a Bible story. There was only one song in the middle and another at the end (after the credit’s start so wait for it).
They missed the mark with some of the humor – allusions to Love Boat, Edward Scissorhands, and Days of our Lives. Just did not seem to belong in a G-rated movie aimed at kids.
The major message throughout the movie was “do the right thing” which is a good message, just not what was expected. The animation was your standard Veggie Tales fare which looks great on my small TV screen but doesn’t hold up to the big screen. Especially when you consider that Kung Fu Panda was on the screen next door.
And I’ve never walked the gangplank
And I’ve never owned a parrot
And I’ve never been to Boston in the fall
Monkey Girl’s (Age 10) thoughts “I give it five stars because it was so funny. They talked about God in way that it made you think. The King was like God – he’s always there to help you even when you don’t see him. The movie fits what we learned in VBS today that “True Heroes know that God is with them." The pirates never said it was God but they were never alone. I bet we’ll watch this movie on the bus when we go to church camp.”
Well I've never plucked a rooster
And I'm not too good at ping ball
And I’ve never thrown my mashed potatoes
Up against the wall
The theatre we saw this in was packed. I think I counted five times that a joke was so funny that the whole theatre laughed. I guess I was just expecting it to have more laughs than that.
I agree with Monkey Girl that there was allegory for God. The prophecy did come true and it did show how God was always with them. Plus in one scene we were reminded repeatedly to “Trust the Rock”.
I didn’t like the part when the King said he was testing the pirates by allowing them a chance to leave before the mission was done. That seems to me to be against what is written in James 1:13-14
When tempted, no one should say, "God is tempting me." For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. (NIV)
There is nothing questionable in the movie and did seem to keep the younger kids’ attention. The only crying the theatre was due to the babies who are too young for any video.
And I’ve never licked a spark plug
And I’ve never sniffed a stinkbug
And I’ve never painted daises
On a big red rubber ball
I feel that it was a two star movie since I think it should have been so much better. It was definitely not up to the standards I expect from Big Idea Productions.
It felt really odd that Madame Blueberry got a longer cameo than Bob the Tomato. Bob was only in the movie from about 20 seconds at the very end. No Bob and Larry – it’s not Veggie Tales in my eyes.
I give the movie three stars because I’ve got to take Monkey Girl’s opinion in consideration. She’s closer to the intended audience than I am.
I might suggest waiting till it’s on video. Put it one and leave the room. The kids will enjoy it and you won’t be bored by it.
Pirates who Don’t Do Anything lyrics by Big Idea Productions
P.S Monkey Girl was happy to see on the credits that “No Vegetables were harmed in the making of this movie”.
Recommended:
Yes
Movie Mood: Good for Kids
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