Homosexuality, Marriage, and Religion Write-Off Apr 28 '05    Write an essay on this topic. Tweet Popular Products in Books Mildred D. Taylor - Roll of Thunder, Hear My Cry: A Literature Unit From $8 Olivier Dunrea - Ollie From $7 The Bottom Line Sorry to sound so sour about this issue. Write-off! What are your spiritual beliefs or religious affiliations? I am a Christian. I truly believe that God is looking down on me from heaven during my every moment on this earth, and that Jesus is my Lord and Savior. (However, I worship in another language, so I'm not very quick with the church-speak. Don't ask me to quote any Bible verses and stuff like that.) But I'll also admit that I'm not a very good Christian. For one thing, I've always had trouble with evangelism. I just think spirituality is an intensely private matter, and to each his own. I'm constantly struggling with trying to figure out how to balance my own spirituality with those of others. I'm particularly turned off by people who are arrogant about their own piety. I don't know what to do about it, to be honest. I just focus on the fact that the only person I can control is myself. What is your sexual orientation? Hetero. How do you see your own religious/spiritual views as influencing your opinion of sexuality? This used to be a difficult question, because the Bible does in fact say man should not lie with man ... etc. But I've come to realize that no one on earth knows God's mind, and no one has the right to judge others based on what they think God wants. There are a lot of things that people do that God would probably not like (including me). Should I go around pointing fingers and judging them every time? Do I want anyone to judge me that way? So my personal view is based on pure autonomy: why don't you just do whatever you like, whether it be premarital sex, adultery, homosexuality, celibacy, or good old-fashioned heterosexual monogamy ... while I do what I like, and we leave each other alone? (Except sex with children or animals, that is.) You know, MYOB. I mean, if you believe that homosexuality is wrong ... then don't be a homosexual! (Pretty good solution, right? You would think.) Anyway, I've come to realize that being tolerant of other people (whether they be homosexuals or people of other religions) is more compatible with my understanding of Christianity than judgment and condemnation. And yeah, it's really as simple as that. How do you define marriage? Hrm ... I don't know. Two people decide that they love each other and then throw a big party and get a lot of presents? But of course, the (current) legal and traditional definition of marriage is: monogamous & heterosexual couple yoked together to create an easily organized social unit called "nuclear family," for the purpose of breeding and propagating the species. What thoughts or reactions do you have to these two pictures? (all completely safe for work, home, etc.) 1. Awww, sweet. 2. Awww, touching. How does one of Christian faith reconcile these two pictures? Is one "right" and one "wrong"? What reactions do you have to seeing these signs? 1. Well ... wrong. This is one of the common ugly things gay-bashers say. And it pisses me off. How can anyone be so arrogant as to tell someone that God hates them? Besides, pretty much everyone I've ever encountered who dares to tell anyone, "God hates you, but God loves me" have a pretty skewed way of judging their own sins. 2. Well ... right. I think gay-bashers hiding behind the religious rationale should do well to remember that judging other people is not What Jesus Would Do. And yes, the Constitution does protect the rights of all citizens, including those of homosexuals. (Good to see the Supreme Court finally recognized that in 2003.) Why do you think the topic of homosexuality is so polarizing in religious communities? People who use religion to justify their prejudices are obviously going to create conflict. And it's one of those topics where if you choose to be on one side of the issue, then you're just stuck on it forever. Your average homophobe is never going to change his/her mind and say, "Yeah, the gays are all right!" And the reason they are so intractable is because being flexible and open-minded would rock their very belief system to the core. I also think that the particular focus on homosexuality comes from the fact that judging sexual behavior is the best way to assert moral superiority. Since adulterers and divorcees are no longer scorned in the way they once were, the likely pariahs are of course, the dirty dirty sodomites. Interesting little note: have you noticed your average anti-gay sentiment is typically centered around two men? There is less outrage over female-female sex. Why is this, aside from the obvious Freudian fear of penile penetration? Also regarding sodomy: did you know that anti-sodomy statutes which were constitutional until 2003 do not identify the genders of the parties involved? (It would violate the Equal Protection clause.) So technically, if you engaged in heterosexual anal sex in the state of Texas before 2003, you would have been breaking the law. Should the government be in the business of defining marriage? Why or why not? Well, who else? Gay people who want to marry are fighting for their union to be approved by the government. The rights, status, and consequence they are demanding are granted by the government. So yeah, they would be the entity to define it. Gay people are not legally prevented from simply living together. What they're demanding is government stamp-of-approval. Would you support the legalization of gay marriage? Yes. If you answered no, what are your fears behind its legalization? If you answered yes, what are your fears behind it remaining illegal? Some of the fears behind its legalization are actually pretty reasonable. (Seriously, hear me out.) Marriage has been defined (since the 1400's) as heterosexual and monogamous. If we get rid of one of the components, the other component (i.e., monogamy requirement) is on its way out. This is not a hysterical claim, such as - Someday you can marry your cat! - kind of crazy ranting that anti-gay-marriage rhetoric has spouted. But there are people who believe polygamy is an ideal and preferred way to live, and should gay marriage become legalized, polygamy proponents will surely fight for their rights under the Equal Protection Clause. And their case would be legitimate. And to be realistic about this, while I think today's society is somewhat ready for gay unions, it is not ready for giving thumbs-up to polygamy. And this issue is still touchy enough that in 2004, John Kerry wasn't quite ready to come out and stump for gay marriage proper, and only supported civil unions. (For that matter, so did Bush.) Why do I ultimately support gay marriage? For probably the same reason that anyone would: two people who want to commit to each other should receive all the legal benefits and consequences that others would, be able to experience all the pleasures and significance of the marriage ritual itself, and be able to raise a family together. This is not only good for them, it is good for everyone. Would you support government-sanctioned civil unions between homosexual couples? No. I think gay activists who pressed for marriage made the right call - to demand full-fledge marriage rights under Equal Protection grounds, before civil unions have really taken root in a majority of states. They realized that once civil unions have become widespread, it would be near-impossible to fight for true marriage rights. They recognized that civil unions would ultimately assign a second-class status to the union, and would be a Pyrrhic victory in the grand scheme of things. It was a brilliant and audacious tactical move that has ... succeeded or failed, depending on how you look at it. (Some blame this issue for galvanizing the religious right - A vote for Kerry is a vote for sodomites! - and sealing Bush's 2004 victory. Which again, is a good or bad thing depending on who you voted for.) Do you see any way of bridging this current divide in our country over "wedge issues" like gay marriage or abortion? Or should we even be trying? I honestly don't know. I'd like to have hope, but I feel increasingly frustrated at the myopic and narrow-minded direction our national socio-political dialogue is going. Too many people are dishonest, and too many people fail to see reason. It's easier to hurl insults and scream and then just cover their ears and go "La la la! I'm right and you're wrong! You're going to hell!" It even happens in the Epinions realm, which I consider a relatively civilized corner of the internet. (Not referring to any participants in this write-off, by the way.) What do you see America's view of homosexuality and gay marriage being in 100 years from today? What will those future Americans think of us in 2005, as they look back? I used to think as bigots die off, society becomes progressively more tolerant. But I'm beginning to see that that's a pretty naive perspective. I really don't know that future generations are going to be more enlightened than we are ... so I just don't know. Final thoughts or ideas: The more homophobia that I witness, the more convinced I am that it's nothing different from racism or misogyny or any of the stupid rationales that people have for treating others like shit. I think it's an ugly fact of human nature that we enjoy feeling superior to others in some way, and what better thing to lord over others than some immutable quality, such as skin color, gender, and sexual preference. At least these days, some people know to feel a little bit ashamed about their racism or sexism. But the homophobes can give the illusion of having God on their side. (And boy are they stuck on that! It would almost be refreshing to meet a homophobe who doesn't invoke the Bible at every turn.) I wish that those who feel that they have to look down on others to feel good would just figure out that ... it is wrong. It is unkind, and it is not good for us, as a people.

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