I'm crashing the Homosexuality, Marriage, and Religion Write-Off
Apr 28 '05
The Bottom Line Here are my thoughts on gay marriage for those who are interested.
Well, I rarely do write offs but I have a few opinions on this topic . . . so if anyone is interested, here they are:
Q. What are your spiritual beliefs or religious affiliations?
A. I consider myself Jewish although I don't affiliate with any temple. I am not particularly religious.
Q. What is your sexual orientation?
A. Heterosexual
Q. How do you see your own religious/spiritual views as influencing your opinion of sexuality?
A. I am not particularly religious and didn't have a religious upbringing. I don't have many religious views other than the world would be better if everyone were kind to each other.
Q. How do you define marriage?
A. A union between two consenting adults.
Q. What thoughts or reactions do you have to these two pictures? (all completely safe for work, home, etc.)
http://www.sfgate.com/c/pictures/2004/03/10/ba_knight01.jpg http://www.sfgate.com/c/pictures/2004/02/13/ba_gaywed_01_lm.jpg
A. They seem happy - good for them.
Q. How does one of Christian faith reconcile these two pictures? Is one “right” and one “wrong”? What reactions do you have to seeing these signs?
http://www.sushiesque.com/photos/boston_common_031104/dscn1373.jpg
http://www.sushiesque.com/photos/boston_common_031104/dscn1419.JPG
A. I am not christian and am not very familiar with christian doctrine.
Q. Why do you think the topic of homosexuality is so polarizing in religious communities?
A. I don't belong to a religious community so I am probably unaware of the polarizing issues. I live in Massachusetts where gay marriage is legal. There have been many gay marriages in our city. The Globe and other local papers run the wedding announcements. Frankly, it is becoming a big yawn here but I know in other areas it seems to frighten and/or anger people.
Q. Should the government be in the business of defining marriage? Why or why not?
A. I personally believe that consenting adults can do whatever they want as long as they don't bother me or harm other people. That said, I do think there should be some limits on marriage. I think marriage should be limited to people over 18. Younger teenagers are not worldly enough to make lifelong commitments about marriage or anything else. I also think marriage should be limited to two people.
I believe the government should define marriage but the decision should be left to the states, not the federal government. This has worked well in the past and we have all eventually gotten to the right answer on the difficult questions. There was a time when some states outlawed interracial marriage. We got to the right answer on that question eventually. I think we will all come around on gay marriage eventually too. By the time my kids are grown, I think it will become accepted practice.
Q. Would you support the legalization of gay marriage?
A. As long as the parties are over 18 and there are only two people in the marriage - I am fine with it.
Q. Would you support government-sanctioned civil unions between homosexual couples?
A. There are civil unions in Vermont and now, I believe, Connecticut. Vermont has had them for some time and, guess what, nothing has changed for the vast majority of people. That said, I think the difference between civil unions and marriage is semantics. We might as well just call it marriage.
Q. Do you see any way of bridging this current divide in our country over "wedge issues" like gay marriage or abortion? Or should we even be trying?
A. There have been many issues like this over time in our country. Segregation obviously was a big one. I take a lot of comfort that, despite all the wrangling over several generations, we now generally embrace diversity in this country. I think, through ongoing debate, we will eventually get to the right answers on other difficult matters.
Q. What do you see America's view of homosexuality and gay marriage being in 100 years from today? What will those future Americans think of us in 2005, as they look back?
A. I think homosexuality and gay marriage will be a big yawn in 100 years, similar to the way interracial marriage is now. I think our progeny will view us as close-minded and ignorant.
Final thoughts or ideas:
I live in a suburb right outside Boston. We have been living with gay marriage for a while now. Nothing in my day to day life has changed. No one really talks about it although I see the wedding announcements in the local paper for two men or two women. Like all couples about to get married, they seem happy and I am happy for them.
In my view, marriage and families strengthen society. Children are better off being raised in strong families with loving parents. The gender of the parents shouldn't matter.
That said, in my daughter's public elementary school, the children are taught that gay marriage is acceptable as part of the diversity curriculum. There is even a poster at the entrance to my daughter's school, drawn by a fifth grader, stating that gay marriage is wonderful.
My fear is that gay marriage will be presented as a choice to my children by society or institutions in society such as the schools. My personal belief is that you are born either gay or straight. If my children were gay, I wouldn't care and would love them no matter what. However, I would be alarmed if they felt the need to experiment sexually with many partners to determine their sexuality. I strongly object to gay marriage being presented in elementary school on any level or in any way. I think the topic is best left to high school age.
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