HYPER CHONDRIAC MUSIC! JARVOCOCKER'S ANSWER TO JAGUARDOG'S MUSIC ARTISTS WRITE OFF Jun 11 '05 (Updated Jun 13 '05)    Write an essay on this topic. Tweet Popular Products in Music Revelation [Digipak] by Journey From $12 Machine Gun Etiquette by The Damned From $40 The Bottom Line In giddy reply to JAGUARDOG'S A-Z Favorite Musical Artists of all time, here is but a kicking point to the seminal groups, singers and songs which have slayed me Juice everybody! Do you like to...boogie woogie? Please don't answer that. Three things that everybody can't live without: food, sex, and most importantly MUSIC! As the funky madam mofo of pop suggested, "DJ, put a record on, I wanna dance with my baby." This is my merry response to JAGUARDOG's invitational write off, the technicalities of which can be perused at http://www.epinions.com/content_4389118084. The gist of the loose musical bollocks is reviewers are asked to share their favorite artists from A-Z. Most people have replied with artists and a compendium of songs they are credited with, but I thought songs were too general, so for the most part I shall list my favorite artists and my favorite albums by them. Off the record, on the qt, and very hush hush. I hope you enjoy my selections, many of which are seconded by people who are now dead. And remember, "Music makes the bourgeoisie and the rebel come together." A Air, THE VIRGIN SUICIDES (SOUNDTRACK). The dreamy, langourous sonic subtext to Sofia Coppola's debut flick catapulted this French duo to out there, Pink Floyd status. Their debut is really good too, as is Talkie Walkie. But this is the sound of emotional disintegration, and it's never been more hypnotic. Fiona Apple, WHEN THE PAWN. Norah Jones gets grammys and records with Ray Charles. Alicia Keys gets grammys and flak for wearing jeans. Meanwhile Fiona gets the ultimate shaft from her record company, unless she's just got massic block. Will there ever be another album from Fiona? If not that's a damn shame, because this is just an absolute, ivory tickled beauty of romantic explosion and implosion. "I Know" is as moving if not more so than anything Aretha in her prime put out. Alice in Chains, SAP. Sad, the ultimate story of Alice in Chains. But this startling acoustic ep revealed a sound more melancholic and intimate than their louder, grungier output. "Got Me Wrong," such a great song. Aerosmith, "Train Kept A Rolling." These days Aerosmith are just polished, arena rock dinosaurs, but this gargantuan track from their sophomore album proves there was once boiling, simmering water in their rock kettle. Ash, 1977. The British Green Day? Whatever. Recorded before they hit twenty, this 1996 album is loaded with full throttle, devil may care rock. "Kung Fu" and "Girl From Mars" are still soaring riot acts of youthful guitar dynamism. Ash are still together and still recording, and they have an import greatest hits available worth checking, but 1977 takes the cake. Abba, "Dancing Queen." No matter what the nay sayers say, Abba were an impeccable pop band, and this mirrorball classic is just timeless. And Agnetha Faltskog and Frida Lyngstad were smashing singers, their vocal interplay sending this song into the stratosphere. B Beatles, ABBEY ROAD. Sure "Revolver" may be more revolutionary. "Rubber Soul" is the folk rock triumph par excellence. But on their swan song the Fab Four approach musical divinity. The medley that climaxes the album is an orgasmic punctuation mark on an unheralded legacy of musical innovation, inspiration and sheer balls out joy. Greatest band of all time, for all time. David Bowie, THE RISE AND FALL OF ZIGGY STARDUST AND THE SPIDERS FROM MARS. The Thin White Duke went through about half a dozen musical mutations...and that was just in the 70s. "Hunky Dory" is fabulous, "Station to Station" is magnetic, "Low" is an avant garde groundbreaker, but for my money no genre clicked for any personality better than glam rock did with Bowie and this 1972 masterpiece. Black Crowes, THE SOUTHERN HARMONY AND MUSICAL COMPANION. Master showman, the combustible relationship between the brothers Robinson paved the way for the bad boy Gallaghers from Oasis, and on this sophomore juggernaut they hit a peak impossible to improve on. "Sake Your Money Maker," "Amorica," and "By Your Side" are also worthy. Beach Boys, PET SOUNDS. The Beatles had the dual genius of Lennon and McCartney to rely on. But there was only one Brian Wilson. On PET SOUNDS he reached for make or break glory, and paid the price for it. Jeff Buckley, GRACE. Blessed with a heavenly voice that nearly eclipses Thom Yorke's, on this breathtaking debut Buckley hit upon the blueprint for "The Bends" a full year before Radiohead caught up. Which makes the misfortune of his untimely death all the more tragic. The posthumous "Sketches For My Sweetheart The Drunk" is also riveting. Beck, ODELAY Blur, PARK LIFE Beastie Boys, HELLO NASTY Bikini Kill, REJECT ALL AMERICAN Beta Band, THE THREE EPS Belle and Sebastien, IF YOU'RE FEELING SINISTER Belly, STAR Bee Gees, "New York Mining Disaster" Blondie, "Rapture" C Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young, DEJA VU Clash, LONDON CALLING Charlatans, US AND US ONLY Chemical Brothers, DIG YOUR OWN HOLE Catatonia, WAY BEYOND BLUE Creedence Clearwater Revival, COSMO'S FACTORY Coldplay, A RUSH OF BLOOD TO THE HEAD Cure, GALORE ERic Clapton, JOURNEYMAN Elvis Costello, IMPERIAL BEDROOM Sheryl Crow, SHERYL CROW Cream, "Sunshine of Your Love" D Bob Dylan, HIGHWAY 61 REVISITED Doors, THE DOORS Derek and the Dominoes, LAYLA AND OTHER ASSORTED LOVE SONGS Donovan, DONOVAN'S GREATEST HITS Duran Duran, "Rio" Def Leppard, "Pour Some Sugar on Me" Dandelion, DYSLEXICON Death in Vegas, THE CONTINO SESSIONS E Eagles, THE LONG RUN Eminem, THE MARSHALL MATHERS LP Elastica, ELASTICA Everclear, SPARKLE AND FADE Echo and the Bunnymen, "Killing Moon" Eurythmics, "Would I Lie To You" F Aretha Franklyn, I NEVER LOVED A MAN THE WAY I LOVE YOU Fleetwood Mac, RUMORS Foo Fighters, "This is a Call" G Grateful Dead, AMERICAN BEAUTY Guns N Roses, USE YOUR ILLUSION II Guess Who, "No Sugar Tonight/New Mother Nature" Go Gos, "Our Lips Are Sealed" Gomez, "Here Comes the Breeze" H Jimi Hendrix, AXIS BOLD AS LOVE Hole, LIVE THROUGH THIS PJ Harvey, DRY Juliana Hatfield, ONLY EVERYTHING George Harrison, ALL THINGS MUST PASS Hives, VENI VIDI VICIOUS Heart, DREAMBOAT ANNIE Hall & Oates, "I Can't Go For That" I Ice Cube, PREDATOR Iggy and the Stooges, RAW POWER Inxs, KICK J Jane's Addiction, NOTHING'S SHOCKING Billy Joel, THE STRANGER Michael Jackson, THRILLER Elton John, GOODBYE YELLOW BRICK ROAD Janis Joplin (Big Brother and the Holding Company), CHEAP THRILLS Jesus and Mary Chain, HONEY'S DEAD Journey, "Feeling That Way/Anytime" K Kinks, ARTHUR OR THE DECLINE AND FALL OF THE BRITISH EMPIRE Kulashaker, K Lenny Kravitz, MAMA SAID L Led Zeppelin, LED ZEPPELIN II John Lennon, JOHN LENNON/PLASTIC ONO BAND Living Colour, TIME'S UP London Suede, THE LONDON SUEDE Lynyrd Skynard, PRONOUNCED "LEH NERD SKIN NERD" M Muse, ORIGIN OF SYMMETRY Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, REQIUEM Paul McCartney, BAND ON THE RUN George Michael, FAITH Aimee Mann, I'M WITH STUPID Madonna, MUSIC Manic Street Preachers, "A Design for Life" Mamas and the Papas, "I Saw Her Again Last Night" Mascagni, INTERMEZZO (CAVALLERIA RUSTICANA) Mercury Rev, DESERTER'S SONGS N Nirvana, NEVERMIND O Oasis, WHAT'S THE STORY (MORNING GLORY) Roy Orbison, "In Dreams" P Pink Floyd, DARK SIDE OF THE MOON Prince and the Revolution, PURPLE RAIN Pixies, DOOLITTLE Primal Scream, SCREAMADELICA Pearl Jam, VS Liz Phair, EXILE IN GUYVILLE Pulp, DIFFERENT CLASS Portishead, DUMMY Prodigy, FAT OF THE LAND Pretenders, THE PRETENDERS Public Enemy, "Bring The Noise" Platters, "Smoke Gets in Your Eyes" Q Queen, "Bohemian Rhapsody" Queens of the Stone Age, R R Radiohead, OK COMPUTER Rolling Stones, LET IT BLEED REM, AUTOMATIC FOR THE PEOPLE Rage Against the Machine, RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE Rod Stewart, EVERY PICTURE TELLS A STORY Red Hot Chili Peppers, BLOOD SUGAR SEX MAGIK Otis Redding, "I've Been Loving You Too Long To Stop Now" Roxy Music, "Virginia Plain" Lou Reed, "Lisa Says" Rush, "The Sprirt of Radio" Gioacchino Rossini, WILLIAM TELL OVERTURE S Smashing Pumpkins, SIAMESE DREAM Bruce Springsteen, BORN TO RUN Supergrass, IN IT FOR THE MONEY Stone Roses, THE STONE ROSES Soundgarden, SUPERUNKNOWN Stone Temple Pilots, PURPLE Simon and Garfunkel, BRIDGE OVER TROUBLED WATER Patti Smith, HORSES Smiths, SINGLES Santana, ABRAXAS Sex Pistols, "Anarchy in the UK" T Tripping Daisy, I AM AN ELASTIC FIRECRACKER Travis, GOOD FEELING T-Rex, ELECTRIC WARRIOR Turtles, "She's My Girl" U U2, THE JOSHUA TREE V Verve, URBAN HYMNS Velvet Underground, THE VELVET UNDERGROUND & NICO Veruca Salt, AMERICAN THIGHS Vines, HIGHLY EVOLVED Violent Femmes, THE VIOLENT FEMMES W White Stripes, DE STIJL Who, WHO'S NEXT Richard Wagner, TRISTAN UND ISOLDE (PRELUDE) Stevie Wonder, INNERVISIONS Weezer, THE GREEN ALBUM X Y Neil Young, EVERYONE KNOWS THIS IS NOWHERE Yeah Yeah Yeahs, THE MASTER EP Z ZZ Top, "I'm Bad, I'm Nationwide"

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