Real time strategy games are very popular. Civilization, The Sims and Roller Coaster Tycoon are stunning examples of how fun it is to build an Empire of sorts and then pat yourself on the back.

So when I saw this game in the "Bargain Bin", I jumped at the chance to once again have the opportunity to make myself virtually amazing.

The Breakdown:

You choose from one of several scenarios (most income, most popular, playing against computer opponents) and in you go! You need to rent/open up a building, equip it with kitchen equipment, tables and chairs and plant life.

You need staff! Hire cooks, waitstaff and managers. As you scroll through your possibilities you'll be able to see their traits, such as Health, Management ability, Selling ability and cooking skills.

You'll have the option of joining a syndicate. Yeah, who has the best pizza place in town? Me, of course. I only had to break a couple legs....

Create exciting pizza recipes to wow your clientele.

The Pros:

The idea of it all. They potentially had something so good in this game.

The scenarios. Easy, medium or hard as well as "most income" or "Most popular" or "First one to make a million dollars". I liked the option of not really having any goal and just playing so that I wouldn't blink and be obliterated.

You can check on how different "target groups" are responding to your restaurant, your food, etc. Click on the target group and a little Polaroid Photo sort of thing pops up and they're either smiling or making a pre-vomiting face.

The "make your own pizza" part! Oh man this was fun! You sort through all your ingredients and apply liberally. You have the traditional meats and cheeses and veggies. You also have all sorts of seafood and insect life. Ew, right? Well, you open franchises in different countries and hey, tastes vary. What else is fun when you're making your pizza is they have a "Chopper". You can click your ingredient over the chopper and it'll dice it smaller and smaller and it's graphically correct and adorable. Cheese starts as a block (chopper chopper) and then it's a thinner slice (chopper chopper) and then it's small chunks, and then shreds, and then sprinkles. How cute! Tomatoes go from whole to halves to quarters to slices to paste! Fun!

The Cons:

No instruction manual.

I'm ashamed to say that I couldn't figure out how to play this game for the life of me. Being impatient, I just jumped on in and thought I was going to kick some butt. After about 20 minutes I was still staring at the screen, clicking on various things.

Aaaaalright, I'll take the tutorial. It turned the light bulb on in my head in terms of staffing, decoration and purchasing supplies. Frustrating though...I clicked on everything on the screen before I'd click on what it wanted me to. The graphics are loud and confusing. What does a big face mean? Staff? Syndicate? Exit?

Oddly enough when I started my next game I couldn't find ANY of the buttons that were there in the tutorial...I couldn't find the staffing, my "information history" and couldn't even figure out how to open my darn restaurant.

Infuriating! I checked out my restaurant...it had some people and staff in it...but when I clicked around it sent me to some other restaurant. I sure the heck didn't open that one or decorate it, where'd it come from? Argh!

You have the option of having things done "automatically" for you in various areas (Select them when you begin your scenario if you'd like) but doesn't that defeat the whole purpose of building your own Pizza Empire?

The verdict: No thank you. I'd like to think I have a decent amount of intelligence. But when I spend hours trying to figure out how to get things done, it's just a waste. Not a good gift idea at all for a younger crowd. Granted, their synapses might fire a little faster than mine but they're not going to understand it.

Stick with one of the mainstream games. Their tutorials are informative, the game itself is easy and fun even if you stink at it and they're a riot for all ages.

*shouting* "86 Fast Food Tycoon!"

Recommended: No