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Pompous Self-Indulgence (JAGUARDOG'S A-Z W/O)Jun 30 '05 (Updated Aug 10 '05) Write an essay on this topic.
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For anyone who has ever lost friends due to their propensity for rattling off the names of their favorite bands when in reality nobody could care less what they're listening to... this write-off is for YOU! And for me. To make things at least a little interesting, my favorite bands/artists will be COMPETING for letters. I'm going by last names here, by the way. I'll list a couple of my favorites for each letter, then attempt to pick my one favorite. Some of these letters were tough. Enjoy. A: AC/DC vs. AFI vs. Ryan Adams vs. Aerosmith vs. Andrew W.K. I've never been a huge Aerosmith fan. Some of their stuff is great, but then some of it is terrible ("Nine Lives", "Just Push Play", etc.), so they're out. Andrew W.K. is great for putting me in a good mood, but I can only stand so many songs about partying. AC/DC is great, but again, I'm not a huge fan. As much as I love "Sing the Sorrow", AFI's older stuff is spotty at best. This leaves us with Ryan Adams, one of my favorite songwriters of the past ten years. With one classic album ("Heartbreaker") and two very good ones ("Gold", "Love Is Hell") under his belt, I think he's a worthy winner. Winner: Ryan Adams B: Beastie Boys vs. The Beatles vs. Beck vs. Blink 182 vs. Blues Traveler vs. Bright Eyes vs. Broken Social Scene vs. Bush This was a tough one. Go ahead and throw out Bright Eyes for being too whiny/pretentious at times, Bush for only having one very good album ("Sixteen Stone"), and Blues Traveler just because I don't like them as much as the other contestants. I know I know, The Beatles are great, but I'm not a huge fan. Blink 182 is thrown in for sentimental purposes, but now that I'm older I can hardly listen to some of their stuff. I love what I've heard from Broken Social Scene, but until I hear more, I can't pick them above Beck and the Beastie Boys. Even though their last album was weak, I've got to go with the Beastie Boys on this one. Winner: Beastie Boys C: Coldplay vs. Billy Corgan vs. Counting Crows vs. Marshall Crenshaw vs. Jim Croce vs. The Cure Yikes, another tough one. Coldplay has some great singles, but their albums bore me a bit. Jim Croce wins out over Marshall Crenshaw by a nose, but loses out to a tough field. As much as I like TheFutureEmbrace, it can't stand up to classic albums by Counting Crows or The Cure. In the battle between guys who look/sound pathetic but get all the girls, Adam Duritz narrowly edges out Robert Smith, though this one goes back and forth depending on my mood. Winner: Counting Crows D: The Darkness vs. DMX vs. Dr. Dre Weed out DMX immediately, bringing it down to The Darkness vs. Dr. Dre. In a clash of styles, The Darkness pull it off thanks to their great live shows. Winner: The Darkness E: Eminem vs. Everclear Not much competition here. Sure, Eminem has fallen off, but in his prime he was one of the greatest of all-time. Winner: Eminem F: Flaming Lips vs. Ben Folds Five vs. Foo Fighters As much as I love Ben Folds Five and the Foo Fighters, the Flaming Lips win this one hands down. Winner: Flaming Lips G: Gorillaz vs. Adam Green vs. Green Day Gorillaz is still one of my favorite musical concepts of all-time, but their two albums are very spotty and sometimes boring. I'll take Adam Green in an upset over Green Day just because I'm really sick of Green Day and Adam is more fun. Winner: Adam Green H: Jimi Hendrix vs. Hootie and the Blowfish Hendrix seems like the obvious choice here... but Hootie has a lot of sentimental value to me. I feel like a complete loser doing this, but... Winner: Hootie and the Blowfish I: James Iha vs. Incubus vs. Interpol "Morning View" pretty much turned me off of Incubus, though I do enjoy "Make Yourself" every now and then. I like Interpol a lot, but taking into account the great songs James did with the Pumpkins ("Blew Away", "Believe", "The Boy", "Go", etc.), I've got to go with him. Winner: James Iha J: Jimmy Eat World vs. Jay-Z vs. Jack Johnson A tough choice here, though it's mainly between Jay-Z and Jack Johnson. "Brushfire Fairytales" is still one of my favorite albums, but his last two have been slightly disappointing. On the other hand, Jay-Z has been pretty consistent over the years (and I love "The Black Album"), so I'm giving it to him. Winner: Jay-Z K: Kansas vs. Ben Kweller Bleh. I don't even like Kansas that much, but somebody had to face BK. "Sha Sha" is great, and he puts on a very good live show, so he's your winner. Winner: Ben Kweller L: Led Zeppelin vs. Lisa Loeb vs. Ludacris I'm not crazy about any of these choices. Zeppelin is clearly the best, but I've never enjoyed them that much save for a few songs. Lisa Loeb is hot... but not as hot as Ludacris's plethora of guest appearances! Winner: Ludacris M: Bob Marley vs. Dave Matthews Band vs. John Mayer vs. Me First and the Gimme Gimmes vs. Modest Mouse A lot of solid contenders here, although anyone who knows me well at all knows my choice already. Even though "Everyday" and "Stand Up" were pretty terrible, I've still got to go with Dave. Winner: Dave Matthews Band N: Nas vs. New Radicals vs. Nirvana vs. Notorious B.I.G. This was a tough one... two of the greatest rappers of all-time, one of the greatest bands of all-time (according to some people anyway), and a one-hit wonder... call me crazy, but I'm going with the one-hit wonder in a major upset. "Maybe You've Been Brainwashed Too" is one of my favorite albums of all-time. Winner: New Radicals O: Oasis vs. The Offspring vs. Old 97s vs. Outkast Possibly the toughest choice yet between Outkast and Old 97s. Two VERY different styles of music in hip hip vs. alt-country. My choice here depends on what kind of mood I'm in... although I'll usually go the alt-country route more often. Winner: Old 97s P: Tom Petty vs. Pink Floyd vs. Polyphonic Spree vs. Prince Tom Petty is great, but I get bored with him relatively easily. Pink Floyd goes a little too far with their experimentations at times ("Ummagumma"). Polyphonic Spree seems like they're trying a little too hard to be the Flaming Lips nowadays. And then there's Prince. Winner: Prince Q: Queen vs. Queens of the Stone Age I'm not a big fan of either of these, although Queen's "A Night at the Opera" is superb and Freddie Mercury is one of the best frontmen of all-time. Winner: Queen R: Radiohead vs. Red Hot Chili Peppers vs. Lou Reed vs. R.E.M. Yikes... toughest call yet. R.E.M. has really faded out with their past couple albums. Some of Lou Reed's work is too out there for me ("Metal Machine Music", "Ecstasty"). I like Radiohead, but I've never really converted into a true fan. On the other hand, I love the Chili Peppers. Winner: Red Hot Chili Peppers S: Saves the Day vs. The Shins vs. Smashing Pumpkins vs. The Smiths vs. Stone Temple Pilots vs. The Strokes Nevermind... THIS is the toughest decision yet. I am a Smashing Pumpkins fanboy, so I'm obviously going to go with them. STP, The Shins, and The Strokes are three of my favorite bands though. If they weren't up against The Corg, they probably would've won. Winner: Smashing Pumpkins T: 2Pac vs. Television vs. Third Eye Blind 2Pac is my favorite rapper of all-time, so he gets the nod here. Television gets honorable mention for having the best song of the three contenders though ("Marquee Moon"). Winner: 2Pac U: U2 vs. Usher Well... honestly, I hate both of these choices. U just isn't the letter for me. There are a handful of U2 songs I really like though. Winner: U2 V: Van Halen vs. Velvet Revolver vs. Velvet Underground Velvet Underground is one of the most underrated bands in the history of rock music. I won't make that mistake here. Winner: Velvet Underground W: The White Stripes vs. Weezer vs. Kanye West vs. Whiskeytown vs. Wilco If Weezer had stopped after "Pinkerton", they'd probably win here. But they didn't, and they won't. It really comes down to Wilco vs. The White Stripes: in my mind, the two best American bands around right now. "A Ghost Is Born" was slightly disappointing, but so was "Get Behind Me Satan". I'll go with Wilco on this one, although I could change my mind at any second. Winner: Wilco X X is up for grabs. Y: Weird Al Yankovic vs. Pete Yorn Weird Al wins on the strength of "It's All About the Pentiums" alone. Winner: Weird Al Yankovic Z: The Zombies vs. Zwan I've never been a huge fan of Zwan... but at Z, they don't have much competition. Winner: Zwan Well, there you have it. My arduous exercise in egotism. I hope you've enjoyed it.  |
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