JAGUARDOG's A-to-Z Music Write-Off Part 1
Jul 20 '05
The Bottom Line A little self-indulgence never hurts.
JAGUARDOG has asked Epinions members to make an A-to-Z list of their all-time favorite musical artists. I've been fanatical about music since the age of two when I used to carry around records the way most toddlers clutch teddy bears. So, needless to say, I let this write-off get a little out of hand, and it's going to have to be in two parts.
For some of the letters, I had a tough time coming up with artists I really love, so it's more of a word-association kind of thing, as I put down the first artists that came to mind. Here goes...
.38 Special — When I put all of my MP3s into WinAmp and put it on random, the player tends to favor these Southern rockers. I find it amusing that their two big hits sound exactly the same but have the opposite message. “So Caught Up in You” directly contradicts “Hold On Loosely,” a song I actually quoted to a friend the other night when giving him advice on women.
Aerosmith — Boston claims these guys as their own, and, while I’m not a huge Aerosmith fan, I might be kicked out of Massachusetts if I didn’t include them on the list. “What It Takes” is an incredible break-up song and also lends itself well to karaoke if you can find it.
Allman Brothers — My dad and I always used to listen to the Allman Brothers when painting or doing other household chores. Their soulful voices and melodic guitars are emotional without being wimpy. “Whipping Post,” about a woman who has done you wrong, is especially cathartic.
American Idol — I’m not ashamed to admit that I’m a huge American Idol fan. I vote; I scream; I plan my schedule around it. It’s definitely an addiction.
Blur — I became a big Blur fan when I spent a semester in London because they are so British. Who else could write songs with the theme “Modern Life Is Rubbish” and sound so darn happy? These BritPop superstars also make really cute videos. I recently met lead singer Damon Albarn (see my current profile photo), which was quite a thrill.
David Bowie — Hugely influential and talented, Bowie was one of the first to take on several stage personae. I got to see him live last year when tabling for Amnesty International, so he’s got good politics, as well.
Garth Brooks — Confession time. I went through an embarrassing country music phase from 8th grade through most of high school and saw Garth Brooks twice.
The Beatles — What can I say about the Fab Four? Liverpool’s finest exports, their work will probably never be surpassed as some of the greatest pop records of all time.
Mary J. Blige — Dance For Me, the remix album, is unbelievably cathartic, especially the epic “No More Drama.” Singing along with the “I’m about to lose my mind / Lord, help me, help me, please!” part will get you through rough times, and “Your Child” will make you realize that your problems pale in comparison to what most people go through.
Cream — With their innovative blend of blues and psychedelia, Cream is one of my favorite bands ever. Eric Clapton, Jack Bruce, and Ginger Baker comprised a power-trio for the ages, which, sadly, broke up after just three years. My dad was lucky enough to see them live twice.
Cher — I love Cher because she embodies everything I’m not: she’s skinny, has silky hair and wigs in various colors, and likes to date younger men. But then again, I can sing like Cher and we’re both tough... at least most of the time. Tonight you’re gonna go down in flames, just like Jesse James. The queen of power ballads is also quite clever and puts on an amazing live show. People love to make fun of Cher, but her career has spanned five decades, and she has an Oscar, so guess who’s having the last laugh.
Crosby, Stills, Nash, and (sometimes) Young — During my first year at my hippy college, I went through a major CSNY phase as I became more politically aware. I remember playing “Ohio” on the 30th anniversary of the Kent State massacre. I’m not a huge Neil Young fan, but his voice fits beautifully into the four-part harmonies.
Mariah Carey — I haven’t liked a lot of what she’s done in recent years, but this diva has one of the best voices out there. Sixteen years (!) after its release, “Someday” is still one of my favorite shower-singing songs.
Eric Clapton — He’s a guitar genius. I’m not a huge fan of most of his solo work, but Cream (see above) and Derek and the Dominoes (see below) rule.
Def Leppard — Their drummer only has one arm. That’s hardcore! Their songs all sound a bit the same thanks to producer Mutt Lang’s formula, but “Pour Some Sugar On Me” and the others are great steering-wheel drumming songs. Plus, the line Do you take sugar? / One lump or two? always cracks me up.
Duran Duran — Ah, the '80s... The big hair, colorful clothing, and decadence. Listen to “Rio” and you’ll want to sell out to the man and ride around on a yacht all day in a white suit; listen to “Come Undone” and you’ll realize why Kelly Clarkson’s “Miss Independent” sounded so familiar the first time you heard it.
The Darkness — This self-aware, '80s hair-band throwback might not have much staying power, but their Permission to Land and live concert sure were fun. You might find yourself wanting to sing, “Get your hands off of my woman, motherf***er” at inappropriate times, however since it’s so freakin’ catchy.
Derek and the Dominoes — This short-lived super-group produced one of the best albums of all time with Layla and Other Assorted Love Songs. Clapton proves that being in love with someone else’s wife can be a the best muse.
The Eagles — I find it amusing that so many people hate the Eagles so much since they are smack-dab in the middle of the road as far as I’m concerned. I love Don Henley’s voice, but some of the songs can be a little sickly sweet. I get a kick out of the grammatical error in “Life in the Fast Lane,” though:
They threw outrageous parties
They paid heavily bills
Erasure — Great driving music, their best of transports you back to the '80s.
Foreigner — They’re often considered a guilty pleasure, but “Urgent,” “Head Games,” and “Hot Blooded” are legitimately good songs. If only they hadn’t made those painful ballads... Check out the dance remix of Winona’s cover of “I Wanna Know What Love Is” for a good laugh.
Lita Ford — You gotta admire this tough, rocker chick for her killer pipes.
Franz Ferdinand — These Scottish lads make catchy tunes that hipsters can dance to. “Take Me Out” was one of the best songs of last year. I saw these guys live in Boston.
Garbage — Another Scottish (well, lead singer Shirley Manson at least) band I’ve seen live, Garbage has been making alterna-rock anthems for well over ten years. “Bad Boyfriend,” from their latest album, is worthy of becoming your next theme song.
Green Day — While Billy Jo Armstrong can be a bit whiny, Green Day put out the best rock opera in years with American Idiot. It’s rare for punk-influenced bands to have such staying power, but I appreciate these guys more now than I did ten years ago.
Heart — I rediscovered Heart after hearing Carrie Underwood sing “Alone” on American Idol. The Wilson sisters have two of the best voices in rock, and their greatest hits album, which I kept in my car’s CD player for over a month recently, tackles nearly every issue a woman could face. From bedding a stranger to have a baby because your husband is sterile (“All I Wanna Do Is Make Love to You”) to falling in love with a man your mom disapproves of (“Magic Man”), they’ve got it all covered. “What About Love” articulates a common frustration with just the right mix of toughness and vulnerability.
Don Henley — “Boys of Summer” still sounds fresh twenty years later, and his latest album contains topical political commentary without sounding trite. I love his scratchy voice, and he’s still sexy even though he’s older than my parents.
Corey Hart — My first crush, this spiky-haired Canadian wears his sunglasses at night, whatever that means. “Never Surrender” is another classic '80s power ballad.
Whitney Houston — It breaks my heart that Whitney Houston has a drug problem these days since she is such an amazingly talented and influential vocalist. Nearly all the aspiring American Idols are at least subconsciously imitating Whitney. “I Wanna Dance With Somebody” is one of my favorite karaoke songs, but I hardly do it justice. She never should have married Bobby Brown!
Jimi Hendrix — One of the greatest guitarists of all time, he died before his time. Listening to Are You Experienced? makes me wish I were alive in the '60s.
Billy Idol — I seem to remember Billy Idol as being legitimately punk in the '80s, but now he just looks like he should be marching in a pride parade. Not that there’s anything wrong with that...
Interpol — I feel like I should like these Manhattan hipsters, but their music isn’t quite melodic enough for me. “I” is a tough letter in this write-off.
Jefferson Airplane — When I got my wisdom teeth out and was doped up on Vicodin, all I wanted to do was listen to psychedelic Jefferson Airplane. They’re famous for the drugged-out classic “White Rabbit,” but some of their more sincere songs like “Today” are so beautiful they could make you cry.
Journey — I sometimes confuse Journey with Foreigner, maybe because of the traveling theme. (Ooh, I should have included Kansas on this list, but I only really like “Dust in the Wind”.) Steve Perry has a great rock-and-roll voice.
Joan Jett — Joan Jett is the ultimate tough rocker chick, and she doesn’t “give a damn” about her reputation. One of my favorite articles of clothing is my hot pink t-shirt with the mantra “What Would Joan Jett Do (WWJJD)” and her silhouette on it.
Kaiser Chiefs — These British blokes (duh!) sound a bit like old-school Blur and put on a great live show.
The Killers — After hearing “Somebody Told Me” about a year and a half ago, I thought these guys were British, but they’re just affected fellows from Las Vegas. Hot Fuss is a solid album, and, like their English idols, they manage to make catchy pop songs about heart-wrenching subjects. (See “Mr. Brightside.”) Spin seems to think they are the next big thing. That remains to be seen, but they are certainly fun for now, and I’m glad it’s OK for boys to wear eyeliner again. Even Mormons like singer Brandon Flowers.
R. Kelly — I don’t understand how this R. Kelly got a record deal when he clearly can’t carry a tune, and his songs are unbelievably ridiculous. My housemates and I spent a couple of hours one night downloading such treasures as “Strip For You,” “Feelin’ on Yo Booty,” and, our favorite, “I Like the Crotch on You.” We were literally rolling on the floor laughing. For a few good guffaws, check out the videos for his latest opus, “Trapped in the Closet Parts 1-5." Good lord...
Led Zeppelin — These Brits took old blues songs and revamped them with a strutting, long-haired kind of sexuality. Psychedelic and heavy, their influence on all subsequent rock music cannot be overstated. Robert Plant’s wailing vocals and Jimmy Page’s brilliant riffs make Zeppelin cock rock at its finest.
Lynyrd Skynyrd — I went through a southern rock phase right after I graduated from high school when I had a summer job at a warehouse. The epic “Free Bird” has just the right blend of melodrama and screaming guitars. While I don’t generally agree with the band’s politics, “Mr. Saturday Night Special” is probably the best anti-gun song out there. It ain’t good for nothin’ but put a man six feet in the hole. Skynyrd still plays the retro circuit despite the fact that most of the original members of the band died in classic rock and roll fashion.
Stay tuned for Part 2!
Head to http://www.epinions.com/content_4389118084 to read the guidelines for this write off and read other people's entries.
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Member: Becky
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