|
|
|
Comment |
Sorted by
Date Written |
Re: Re: Kpar... (Reply to this comment)
by AinsleyJo
I can't believe that this was just his time and fate. Phil could have lived to be 100 had this not happened.
However, this was in no way your fault. You were a good friend to him. Hindsight is 20/20, and you wish that you had seen some of the signs that this might happen, but it didn't seem to me that you were put into a situation where you would see those signs.
However, there were others who were, and they should have done more.
There's an important lesson here:
Abusing alcohol and drugs isn't a wise way to deal with life's problems.
Phil wasn't "predestined" to die at a certain age and would have died in a car wreck, suffered a heart-attack, lost a battle with cancer, etc. had this not happened.
He had the potential to grow old and, along the way, watch his nephew grow up, enter school, get his driver's license, graduate, go to college, etc. That was what Phil was meant to do, I'm sure.
Likely, he would also have ended up getting married and having children of his own and grandkids to spoil rotten.
He made the wrong choices.
Again, I don't think that this was your fault.
Perhaps, you might have picked up on something that let you know that he was going through struggles that would inspire this kind of escape.
On the other hand, it might not have been done as an escape but, instead, as a response to a popular and misguided view that this is just part of growing up and being a "fun-loving" person.
There's a lot of blame to go around, and you don't seem to me as if you share much, if any, of it.
There are, most importantly, lessons to be learned from your story.
If even just one young person reads your story and is persuaded to choose a different means of entertainment and/or dealing with problems, you will have spared yet another family and group of friends the grief you're feeling now.
Blessings!
AJ :-)
|
Oct 22 '06
3:21 pm PDT
|
|
Re: Kpar... (Reply to this comment)
by kparsons13
My new friend,
I came back to this the other day to read what you had written, and I got teary eyed.(in a positive, warm way) I wasn't able to write a good comment back until now and I just hope you read it. People reach out and meet each other for various reasons in life and I believe that happens even over the internet. For some reason, I think that it was just Phil's time and his fate whether it was the drugs, alcohol, or possibly a car accident. The people who loved him greatly miss him of course, but also know he has reunited with others in his family now. I look at his picture and carry around his obit in my purse to remind me of his smile and to live life each day as if it was my last. I am glad to hear that you have found this piece helpful in some way and your sobriety. My regret has gone away now as the time has began to heal me.
kparsons13
|
Apr 18 '06
1:53 pm PDT
|
|
Re: Lovely (Reply to this comment)
by kparsons13
Bob,
You have always been a nice support here on EP. I thank you for your kind words and have come to realize that he is up there looking over me and smiling.
kparsons13
|
Apr 18 '06
1:44 pm PDT
|
|
Kpar... (Reply to this comment)
by hstisgod
Hey... Im glad you came by my piece "when we began". Not because you read it, or even commented on it, but because it gave me the investigative instinct to see this piece. It only re-enforces my newly found sober ways. I am so sorry to hear about your friend. Not only will his misunderstood "friend(s)" be paid back in karma tenfold, but Im 110% positive he is still smiling over you. Heaven is all that far away. Hang in there, and let go of regret my new friend, Im also positive its the last thing Phil wants you to feel.
|
Apr 16 '06
8:30 am PDT
|
|
Lovely (Reply to this comment)
by pvreditor
This beautiful and heartfelt, Kim. I'm sure that Phil knows what good friends he had. Thanks for writing this.
--Bob
|
Apr 12 '06
9:58 am PDT
|
|
Thank you to Everyone for Their Comments... (Reply to this comment)
by kparsons13
I haven't really been able to come back to this piece since I wrote it. Over 300-400 people showed up at Phil's service. He was very loved. It has been exactly a week since I found out about his death. I am learning to heal. It is hard but I am glad that I have people's support and thoughts and prayers. Thank you for commenting and thinking of me.
kparsons13
|
Mar 31 '06
12:51 pm PST
|
|
(((hugs))) (Reply to this comment)
by kelly60
This is a beautiful tribute to Phil. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and his family.
Kelly
|
Mar 27 '06
3:17 am PST
|
|
I am very sorry about the loss of Phil, you see..... (Reply to this comment)
by Dunkjam
I just lost my mother on March 7th. She was 80 yrs young and had just gotten out of the hospital. I do not think we are ever really ready for a death no matter what the circumstances. Please do not feel guilty about not helping him. I had the flu and was not able to be with my mom on her last day and will always regret that. Time will make the pain lessen a little. Just remember the good memories and thank God that he was your friend. Take care, Eva
|
Mar 26 '06
5:01 pm PST
|
|
... (Reply to this comment)
by speeddemon531
Sorry for the loss of your friend...at such a young age, too. Seems like the world has changed and people are too caught up in their own lives and too apathetic to the plight of others to help out people in need. Whenever I hear about things like this, I wonder if the outcome could have been different if anyone had just stepped in and provided a shoulder to lean on.
Again, my condolences.
Mike
|
Mar 26 '06
3:42 pm PST
|
|
Kim (Reply to this comment)
by theresaro
I'm so sorry for the loss of your friend. My prayers are with you.
Teri
|
Mar 26 '06
5:43 am PST
|
|
|
|
