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just a thought. (Reply to this comment)
by stephies0
"I look at pictures of these three huge families and I notice that everyone looks well fed, well groomed, and cared for. Everyone is smiling and looks happy. I wonder what it must be like to grow up in such a huge family. I'm sure there are a lot of fun times, but I also wonder about the stresses. With so many people in a household, I wonder if anyone gets any privacy or quiet time to just dream. I wonder about the individual talents and interests of each child and whether or not they're nurtured. I wonder if any of the children has time to have a conversation with their parents by themselves."
I think it's important to remember that most families living in our fast paced society rarely ever take the time to do these things even if they *have* plenty of time. Having been homeschooled and met many large families such as these, I've found that they nurtured the family relationship far more than mine or other smaller families did.
The older children are raised knowing how to raise a happy family, helping to take care of their younger siblings and freeing the parents up to spend quality time with eachother or friends or each child. I'm not saying that this is a lifestyle that most people in our day and time would be up for, but I do think that when done correctly, the benefits far outweigh the risks.
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Aug 03 '07
8:10 am PDT
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Re: Re: Food For Thought (Reply to this comment)
by dianapinions
Yes, those comments can definitely stay with you. I was apparently a "honeymoon baby". My mother was only 21 years old when she had me, and when I grew up, she let me know that she had not been happy to be a mother at so young an age. I'm not sure why she felt it was a good idea to tell me that.
Diana
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Jun 19 '06
4:07 am PDT
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Re: Food For Thought (Reply to this comment)
by knotheadusc
What a poignant comment, Virginia. My mother, much as I love her, often used to tell me that I wasn't planned or wanted, either. I'm the youngest of four girls and there's an eight year difference between me and the next one. I was born the year before abortion became legal. I doubt she would have had an abortion... but sometimes I wonder. And those comments really stay with you when you hear them from a parent.
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Jun 16 '06
7:56 am PDT
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Food For Thought (Reply to this comment)
by Granniemose
To each his own. Your great essay gave us something to think about. When I was a kid there was nothing strange about a large family..in fact the family with one or two kids were considered strange by some people. My Mother had two kids and didn't want any more. Seven years after she decided she didn't want any more, she found she was pregnant with me. She didn't believe in abortion (something done with quinine pills and gruesom wires) mostly because it was against the law and many woman died in the attempt. So i was born, and remained unnamed for a couple of months I was told. She had a wonderful boy and a beautiful girl, what more could she want? Well, if she had to have another child, it would have to be a boy, and they would name it Elmer Earl. I guess I am lucky I was a girl - but somehow the thought has always remained with me that I was the one that bought bad luck to the family. Not that I am complaining. It took many years of self study, but I find now that my kids love me, and I kind of like myself, warts and all.
Virginia
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Jun 15 '06
3:11 pm PDT
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Interesting... (Reply to this comment)
by vicfar
I always wondered why Americans have such fascination for freak shows. There seems to be a lot of interest for the extreme and the most ridiculous.
Philosophically, I find this strange: to me the extremes are rarely stimulating and almost always boring because these phenomena dismiss themselves in their uniqueness and serve only to validate our presumed "normality". What really fascinates me is the average American family of 4, with two cars and a dog, living in a little house in the woodsy suburbs, with country club and church membership --- the backbone of our society.
Now, this is not a freak show, unfortunately. This is the frightening reality, and I believe I am either crazy or the only last normal person in this country, but I find THIS very interesting. This stunning conformity, this uniformity, this sameness in its surreal, narrow-minded choices, in its incredible self-righteousness, in its almost unacknowledged but blatant contradictions.
And this does not just apply to the US. Take almost any Western society. Freak shows are boring. Normality is shocking and frightening...
V.
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Jun 14 '06
8:08 pm PDT
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Re: Well heck... (Reply to this comment)
by knotheadusc
Aw Missy, thanks for the birthday wish!
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Jun 14 '06
9:30 am PDT
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Well heck... (Reply to this comment)
by pnutmom
We only have one child and a dog, and our dog has gotten a lot less attention since having the kiddo! I can't imagine having 14 more kids!! I do wonder how parents manage to spend time with each child, individually. I don't remember what family it was that I read about, but they had 15 kids and claimed that both parents spent time every week with the kids, one-on-one. I just don't see how...there's two of them, and 15 kids...they're outnumbered 7.5 to 1! I'm a Christian, but I'm still a firm believer in birth control! lol
And last but not least, happy early birthday!! :)
Missy
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Jun 14 '06
7:59 am PDT
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Re: Surprisingly..... (Reply to this comment)
by knotheadusc
kath,
I have three older sisters and I always thought I was part of a big family. You're right...four kids compared to sixteen is NOTHING!
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Jun 14 '06
6:45 am PDT
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Surprisingly..... (Reply to this comment)
by kamel622
........having four children many people think I have a large family. Doesn't seem very big to me, but since more people are choosing one or two children I guess it does seem like a lot.
I give these families all due credit. I don't think I could do it. I love kids, but I love quiet time too. :)
A very interesting review and I'm going to check out the suggested websites. .......Make it a great day........kath
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Jun 14 '06
6:01 am PDT
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Thanks for.. (Reply to this comment)
by kyrao1
the neat review. I think I saw something about them on tv also. You are 100% correct...they are over-organized if there is a such thing! I wish I had half of their organization.
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Jun 13 '06
10:14 pm PDT
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Re: Re: Re: ... (Reply to this comment)
by knotheadusc
Where the wits end, so should the procreation.
How I wish my husband's ex wife would subscribe to this motto...
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Jun 13 '06
6:44 pm PDT
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Re: ... (Reply to this comment)
by knotheadusc
Your comment gave me a laugh!
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Jun 13 '06
2:34 pm PDT
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Re: Yikes! (Reply to this comment)
by knotheadusc
Yeah... I just can't imagine having all of those kids. But if other people can do it, more power to them!
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Jun 13 '06
10:00 am PDT
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Yikes! (Reply to this comment)
by mrkstvns
And to think I worry about how to keep up with *ONE* kid!!
"Supersize" families. Sounds like a GREAT idea ...for somebody else!!
;-)
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Jun 13 '06
9:44 am PDT
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