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Manly Meat SaladAug 24 '06 Write an essay on this topic.
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The Bottom Line Feel free not to talk or chew with your mouth open while eating. Think incurious thoughts. Savor the mix of steak, gorgonzola, and greens.
Both a recent study and poll have confirmed the world’s opinion of Americans. We are fat and stupid. First, we are now so fat that some of us cannot be X-rayed unless the hospital has the Earth Whale 9000 available. Second, a majority of Americans still believe Iraq had WMDs, and also figured in the tragedy of 9/11.Still others believe in the literal truth of the Bible and are waiting for the “Rapture” to occur in the Middle East with George Bush at the ready. And the average family in the NY region can expect to pay 900 dollars more for gas this year. But it’s un-American to call us fat and stupid. It will curve our spines, is unpatriotic, and will let the terrorists win. So let’s just call us all “big-boned” and “incurious” like our President, who was once almost assassinated by a pretzel. All this makes me, a liberal member of the reality based community, want to grill something into a carcinogenic husk and drink myself into a stupor on microbrews until January 2009 or thereabouts. But then, I had a better idea. Yes, I will still drink myself into a stupor from time to time to escape the incompetence and stupidity of the neo-con agenda, not to mention Dick Cheney’s horrible visage, but there’s more to life than politics, though global warming will change that just as soon as we are all bankrupted, outsourced, and globalized to death by corporate interests. So, I developed this recipe, not just any recipe mind you; it’s the manly meat salad sure to please the retrosexual within, if not the repuglican down the block who just drove by in his Hummer on his way to make a down payment on a fill-up. Manly Meat Salad Manly Meat Salad serves 2-4 people who can be X-rayed; double amounts for the big boned and incurious macrobrew swillers. Ingredients: 1 lb. Bottom round or other cut suitable for London Broil. 1 bag field greens salad (or head of comparable lettuce such as red leaf) 1 red onion (peeled and diced to taste) 1-2 Jersey tomatoes (sliced or chopped) 1 cucumber (peeled and sliced to taste) 1 3-4 oz. package Gorgonzola cheese Ranch dressing (optional) Suggested Beer: Sierra Nevada Pale Ale or something in the pale ale/IPA family, possibly a fuller bodied amber. For Marinade: Soy sauce (2 tablespoons) McCormick’s Montreal Steak Seasoning (2 teaspoons) Olive Oil (of good quality, non-virgin variety) (1/4 cup) 1 clove garlic (peeled and smashed) Directions 1. Whisk marinade ingredients together in small bowl. Place steak in zip lock bag (cut steak into quarters for easier grilling if preferred). Add marinade to cover. Shake a bit. Refrigerate for 30-45 minutes. 2. Heat grill. (“beer grillman”) 3. Assemble salad in large bowl. Rinse and wash lettuce. Chop as needed. Place in bowl. Add sliced tomatoes, cucumber and onion to taste (may not want to use whole cucumber and onion). Mix well. 4. Grill meat to preferred “doneness” (medium rare is best). Let rest. Slice. 5. Break off chunks of Gorgonzola and add to salad. Plate salad if desired. 6. Assemble slices of steak on top of salad/plates. Add salad dressing (optional). Serve with beer. Feel free not to talk or chew with your mouth open while eating. Think incurious thoughts. Avoid political discussions and let the mouth savor the mix of steak, gorgonzola and the salad with ranch dressing on top. It’s pretty much a slice of heaven. Vegan Version Substitute 1 pound block of tofu or 1 brick of Styrofoam padding material for meat. Marinate and grill as above. Sources http://today.reuters.com/news/articleinvesting.aspx?type=governmentFilingsNews&storyID=2006-07-25T193227Z_01_N25202592_RTRIDST_0_HEALTH-OBESITY.XML http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/08/07/AR2006080700189_pf.html http://mediamatters.org/items/200608010007 http://archives.cnn.com/2002/ALLPOLITICS/01/13/bush.fainting/ http://www.thefreedictionary.com/incurious http://www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/factsheet/Risk/heterocyclic-amines http://www.mccormick.com/productdetail.cfm?id=6209  |
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