Ahh... Poor Lady Mondegreen
Dec 21 '06
The Bottom Line Happy Holidays To One and All.
God Bless Us Everyone
When I was young I sang constantly.
Being a big Elton John fan he got a lot of my air time.
It wasn't until I was older that I realized that I rarely sang the right words as a kid.
Even today, I find myself reverting back to the lyrics as I knew them when I was a child.
Enclosed are the top 12 Mondegreens I remember. Mine are in italics and the real ones are below. Needless to say, Elton was a mystery to me for a long time. 1 part poet and 2 parts Guru.
Surely, his lyrics must mean something
Rolling Stones
I’ll never be your pee stained virgin
...I’ll never be your beast of burden
Manfred Mann
Blinded by the light, wrapped up like a douche another rotor in the night
...Blinded by the light, revved up like a deuce, another runner in the night
Stevie Nicks
Just like a wonder sponge
...Just like the white winged dove
Jose Feliciano
Police nabbed my dad
...Feliz Navidad
Elton John
Levon bears his wahboon like a clown.
...Levon wears his war wound like a crown
(I thought a wahboon was some weird British word… a heavy object or something)
She’s got electric boobs, her mom has too
...She’s got electric boots, a mohair suit
So goodbye yellow brick road,
Where the dulsa society now,
You can’t stand being a pen pal,
I’m going back to my crowd.
...So goodbye yellow brick road
Where the dogs of society howl
You can't plant me in your penthouse
I'm going back to my plough
(needless to say, I really had no idea what this song was about)
Rocket man, burnin’ up the fuel Saul ever known (???)
...Rocket man, burnin’ out his fuse up here alone
Saul was (of course) the other astronaut who somehow died
If you feel that is real, I’m on fire
And I’m a hero in person
Like a coin in your midst
...If you feel that it's real I'm on trial
And I'm here in your prison
Like a coin in your mint
I can’t lie, no more Oggie Doggness
...I can't light no more of your darkness
(what can I say, I thought he was a big Hanna Barbara fan, and really when you think about it, this line is brilliant)
Want to please excuse my family but it’s not my cup of tea
...Won’t you please excuse my frankness but it’s not my cup of tea
I’m going back to the bottom
Where Elijah went, Elijah is in the mood
...I'm going back to the border
Where my affairs, my affairs ain't abused
I thought this was a VERY religious song. I wanted the choir to sing it in church
and one more for good luck
Back to the Hollywood broads that you knew
hunting the horny back toes
...Back to the howling old owl in the woods
Hunting the horny backed toads
Yellow Brick Road was the weirdest song ever recorded which made it very attractive.
Please feel free to share your own. Don't copy from any number of the books but tell me the real ones from when you were a kid. Look stupid and laugh at your own ignorance.
It's fun.
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shmoo1
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