My Favorite Dumb Movies! Top Ten Stupid Films

May 13, 2007

The Bottom Line All these films violate rules of good cinema, but are fun to watch anyway.

Casablanca was a masterpiece, it deserves its place in cinema history. But what about those other films that entertained us? The ones that defy rules of taste, plot, script and common sense? This list is in their honor, my salute to my ten favorite films that for all intents and purposes were really bad films. Keep in mind that this is not a list of the Ten Worst Movies, it is a list of ten bad movies that I enjoyed! So bad they are good movies!

Ten: Get Carter (2000 remake) Sylvester Stallone has made many really bad films, and two of them made my list! I watched this remake of Get Carter where Stallone plays Jack Carter a loan collector who tries to find out who killed his younger brother. The original Jack Carter, Michael Caine, also starred. All the way home from this movie I was in hysterics as my friend kept doing his deadpan Stallone imitation My name is Jack Carter, and you don't want to know me

Nine: I, Robot First, let me tell you the reason I think this film was so bad. As a kid (and yeah, a bit today still), I was a total sci fi geek. I read everyone, especially legendary science fiction writer Sir Isaac Asimov. His I, Robot books were the apex of science fiction writing, really well written, intelligent and entertaining books. In this film adaptation, only the entertaining portion remains. This movie is NOT AT ALL like the books, and goes in directions that Asimov never intended with his brilliant series. In fact, the IMDB listing states that it is suggested by the Asimov book. (Kind of like, based on a true story, uh huh). However, I had so much fun with the visual effects, the soundtrack, and the action in this film, that I actually ended up forgiving them for completely trashing Asimov's book.

Eight: Starship Troopers Director Paul Verhoeven gives his special treatment to what was a classic Robert Heinlein book in his over the top space war epic. It stars Denise Richards (a fine well respected actress) and Neil Patrick Harris as officers in our war on the Planet of the Bugs. Even Futurama's Zap Brannigan couldn't top the exaggeration of this film.

Seven: Deuce Bigalo American Gigalo Rob Schneider is the star, that alone makes this a very dumb movie. I almost didn't admit that I had ever seen this movie, let alone loved it. Yet... the incredibily stupid Rob Schneider in this even stupider film.. made me laugh out loud.

Six: Independence Day Will Smith saves the day from aliens with the help of Jeff Goldblum. When you really take a look at this film, it is preposterous. A huge special effects budget and stars make up for a story that is really bad. So, the aliens use Windows huh?

Five: Commando Arnold made many bad but popular films, but this is one of my favorite truly bad films he made. Arnold single handedly takes out an entire army and instead of shooting his arch rival at the climax of the film, they throw down their weapons and duke it out mano y mano. Did I mention Rae Dawn Chong and rocket launchers?

Four: Cobra Sylvester Stallone could probably have his own list of stupid films, but I picked Cobra as the funniest stupid movie he has ever done. The bad guy is armed and dangerous and in a local supermarket. Lt. Marion "Cobra" Cobretti is sent in. The man threatens to blow the whole place up if Cobra interferes. Stallone's dead pan response? Go ahead, I don't shop here. It's lines like this and Stallone's actual serious delivery of the same that made this hopelessy cheesy film a lot of fun to watch.

Three: Fifth Element You don't need to have a low budget to make a bad film. A great director Luc Besson, eye candy Milla Jovovich, star actors Bruce Willis, Gary Oldman, all participated in this ridiculous over produced outlandish sci fi story. I hate this movie!,but yet I watch it again... and again. Is it to see Milla Jovovich in her ribbon outfit? To hear Gary Oldman's ridiculous accent? To see Bruce Willis with hair? I don't know!

Two: The Transporter The sheer force of Jason Statham makes this film enjoyable, but if we really look down into the plot, the dialogue and all that other stuff that makes a fine piece of cinema, it just isn't there. What we get instead is Jason, lots of intense physics defying car chase scenes, plenty of fighting and plenty of action. But that is a good thing.

One: Evil Dead II You know what? This movie may be a cult classic, it may be one of my favorite movies, it may star my favorite B-list actor, Bruce Campbell, and it may even be directed by Spiderman director Sam Raimi, but the reality of it is.... Evil Dead II was not really a good movie! It was cheesy low low budget horror blended with three stooges humor and really bad acting by all involved. However, it was sooo bad that it was great, and makes this film my FAVORITE stupid film.

These are ten truly bad films that really must be seen. However, I really loved these films and 9 out of ten of these films are in my permanent collection. The top two films even have spaces on some of my other top ten lists. I would also like to thank ssjakira1 whose list of Top Ten Dumb Movies inspired me to write my own.

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