Tunits, Tea-Units, and a Rambling Rant that Does Not Run On Apr 11 '08    Write an essay on this topic. Tweet Popular Products in Books Mildred D. Taylor - Roll of Thunder, Hear My Cry: A Literature Unit From $8 Olivier Dunrea - Ollie From $7 The Bottom Line Wherein are displayed the beauty of the English language and the utter worthlessness of more than one modest closetful of clothes. RANT: RACKS AND RETAILERS Laptops, tiny Braille books, preparation for a French Honor Society induction, literature, chargers for a plethora of electronics, and the Godiva Chocolate Frapaccino so essential to an enjoyable education—these necessary yet mundane items, hastily tossed into a rolling satchel, did not project a promising educational experience last Thursday. Ten minutes of a grammar course, however, instantly obliterated my woes concerning soggy learning and drab, inapplicable principles. Each student in the class was to write a Tunit consisting of at least one hundred words. “A Tunit”? you ask. “What on earth is a Tunit?” Quite honestly, I have no idea. I know only that, when the assignment was later sent to me, the instructor had written the word “Tunit”. I must presume that this was accidental on her part; if not, a Tunit is likely an electronic harp tuner used by a person given to Slanguage. Oops! No person given to that sort of violence upon the English language would enroll in Advanced Grammar 311. I suppose I must look elsewhere. If a Tunit is not an electronic tuner for the loveliest of instruments, that word must not exist. Judging from the remarks in class, the instructor must have intended to send me guidelines regarding a T-Unit. Now, I suppose, you would like to know what a T-unit is. A tea-unit is a tiny cup in the shape of a rose that contains a delicious beverage made from two bags of Peppermint Tea, three bags of Earl Grey Tea, a bit of honey, and a small amount of cream. Oh, my! What am I thinking? The spelling is not quite correct, so I suppose we were not supposed to write about Tea-Units. Oh, how dreadful to think that I cannot create an ode to my favorite evening beverage, in all of its sweet, intense splendor! I was left with one alternative on that day, now turned stimulating and beautiful through an exhilarating assignment. Apparently, students were to create T-units of at least one-hundred words. Each T-unit could enlighten the reader on any topic, but must be grammatically correct. If a T-unit is neither an elegant cup of tea nor an electric tuner, what is it? In all seriousness, a T-unit is an independent clause, along with all of its modifiers. Sentence fragments do not consist of an independent clause and, consequently, do not count. Compound sentences could not attain T-unit status, as they contain two independent clauses. One, and only one, independent clause must comprise this one-hundred-word T-unit. Rhetoric is an informative subject and crucial to writing and speaking. Yet, I own that I did not concentrate in my rhetoric class that day. Instead, I wrote my T-unit! Never before have I been permitted to rant about a subject that truly distresses me; certainly, I have not been asked to rant using perfect grammar. Nevertheless, the following was a valiant attempt. The venture was simply delightful; I am considering writing another rambling T-unit, for the sheer pleasure of stringing together phrases that form a cohesive whole. T-UNIT: FROM BOREDOM TO BATHING-SUITS "If you are blind, you know that shopping for clothes with your mother is a trial to youthful innocence that entails wandering aimlessly from aisle to aisle; fingering endless racks of velvet, satin, lace, cotton, denim, and corduroy; coming to the conclusion, only five minutes later, that nearly all fabrics are tactilely identical; leaning on the cart in bored frustration while your sister exclaims in delight over various bathing-suit styles; listening to your frugal mother’s discussion of sale prices; trying to convince your family that the day promises more exhilarating adventures, if you and your blouse-obsessed companions can only leave the store; trying not to whine on pain of punishment; whimpering about your aching feet, empty belly, and unstimulated mind despite your best intentions; and anticipating the hot yet welcome ride home, where you will put on a new bathing-suit and dive into the backyard pool." Now, if you think about it, you know that I am absolutely correct. Why purchase what amounts to endless fabric--pounds and pounds of it, whether you live in America or Britain--if you can purchase music, food, waterfalls, lilies, or music? Yes, melodies are more important than marquisette; after all, you can enfold yourself in the lasting velvet of Terry MacAlmon's music without fear of staining that masterpiece! Comments are welcome. If you find that this does not meet the criteria for a T-unit as outlined above, find grammatical errors, or feel that the sentence is otherwise lacking, I would truly appreciate feedback. Although I have already turned this in, my intention is to perfect this T-unit until I become convinced that a better sentence has never before been crafted.

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