The 30 Best Albums of 2008 (30-11)!Jan 25 '09 Write an essay on this topic.The Bottom Line It's about time. And don't worry. You're next. Since the anticipation has probably gotten to the point where you find it hard to sleep at night and are even having difficulty performing routine daily tasks (Yes, I noticed that toothpaste all over your shirt), I will relieve your anxiety with, finally, the release of my favorite 30 albums of 2008. To begin, a brief run through of 30-21, a detailed, unrivaled analysis of 20-11, and so much fun you'll probably want to wear a condom. Please enjoy, feel free to comment, and keep your eyes open for albums 10 through 1 which will be released shortly. Honorable Mentions (30 - 21): 30. Calexixo - Carried To Dust 29. The Very Best - The Very Best Mixtape 28. Gang Gang Dance - Saint Dymphna 27. Bonnie "Prince" Billy - Lie Down in the Light 26. Lou Reed - Berlin: Live at St. Ann's Warehouse 25. Fuck Buttons - Street Horrrsing 24. Wolf Parade - At Mount Zoomer 23. Blitzen Trapper - Furr 22. Lil Wayne - Tha Carter III 21. The Walkmen - You & Me 20. Fucked Up - The Chemistry of Common Life Just how intense is Fucked Up? Well, to put it simply, I start sweating one minute and thirty six seconds into the first track, Son the Father, and only begin to consider cooling down once my iTunes has continued playing through the "F's" and reaches Future Clouds and Radar. Although Fucked Up aren't truly any sort of hardcore savants, they bring enough rage and libido to the relatively comfortable realm of indie rock to tear the fucking realm a new one. Lead singer, Pink Eye's snarling, violent screaming never approaches anything resembling singing and yet somehow this band manages to play some of the catchiest music to bang your head to this year. Toss in the fact that they aren't afraid of the penis jokes that might be tossed their way after including a Zelda flute or an echoing synthesizer, and you have a band to get excited about. You also have a band that will tear your fucking esophagus out of your throat, Rambo-style, if you ever insult them. So I recommend saving the tiny dick jokes for the next band on the list. 19. Elbow - The Seldom Seen Kid How in God's name can I even attempt to compare this precocious, luscious batch of brilliantly conceived pop songs with the aforementioned rioting? Well, realistically I can't, seeing as the albums are nothing alike and serve entirely different purposes. One blasts through barriers like I frequently blast through women, while the other gently and sweetly sugars you with melodious clouds like it has often been said I gently and sweetly sugar women. So why do I bother insulting your intelligence and your dignity by ranking Elbow's latest with the entirely incomparable album from Fucked Up? I mean, seriously, why the hell do I keep wagging my pretentious numbers around like my opinion is worth a damn and it even makes a rat's butt of difference that I like Elbow's The Seldom Seen Kid a little bit more than The Chemistry of Common Life? Am I even sure I like Elbow's album better? Isn't it possible that one more listen to Fucked Up and these positions might flip entirely? What if the initial ranking was entirely based upon my psychological state at the time? Maybe I was depressed, or uncomfortable with my own sexuality and this is what convinced me Elbow's light, floating pianos and sweeping orchestration were better for me. Couldn't that be it? And wouldn't that in turn, make this whole ranking of albums a sham? A contrived, self-serving, masturbation on the faces of all the many readers who might put stock in suck rankings? How do you live with yourself, knowncutter? How do you even wake up in the morning?! Screw you, man! Screw you and all your rankings! I don't care what you say anymore! Oh, you want some of this? You want a piece of this man? Bring it on! [Scuffling is heard in the background. Knees are scraped and grown boys are left weeping like little catholic girls. This best of list might not make it all the way to the end. Or even to fifteen] (Sorry if you made it through all that self-doubt. In short, I have decided that this is a very pretty record. Pretty like a flower.) 18. The Dodos - Visiter Definitely a band to watch here in the Dodos. These guys do more with energetic percussion and extraordinarily noticeable acoustic strum patterns than I think is technically possible. There are many standouts on Visiter, but Red and Purple is the sort of warm, embracing song so incredibly right that I don't think I've listened to it once without suddenly feeling the desire to grab my acoustic and write some music. Sadly, the melodies and turns I come up with never quite measure up the all the glory the Dodos seemingly effortlessly display on their debut. 17. Bon Iver - For Emma, Forever Ago Way too much has been said of this record's back-story already (if you somehow have avoided hearing it, I'm not going to succumb to the pressure of telling you. In doing so, I will likely be the first individual to avoid mentioning how Justin Vernon, aka Bon Iver, wrote this album in a lonely log cabin in the cold winter of Wisconsin or... shoot. Well, now you know). Regardless, I feel like even when the hype around Bon Iver's cold, isolated recording process has dyed down, the songs on this record will still emote better than the majority of singer/songwriter albums. Probably even in the distant future when cars fly and carrots no longer exist and the rabbits are vicious, savage man-eating beasts as a result. Probably. 16. Girl Talk - Feed the Animals To be honest, I can respect anyone who wants to call this album the best record of 2008. I easily listened to this record more than anything else this year and still don't feel like its replay value has diminished all that much. I think Gillis can mash better, and maybe even did mash more successfully on Night Ripper, but Feed the Animals is exactly what us animals needed for more clubbin' and rubbin' and dancin' and stuff! Am I right, animals?! I said am I right?! If you'll excuse me, the animals and I have some lawns to burn. Why we don't just mow them is beyond me... 15. The Magnetic Fields - Distortion This album held down my number two slot for a good portion of the year, but upon listening to it again I've determined it's just way too inconsistent. Still, I love hearing Stephen Merritt's deep croon amidst a wash of prickly, thorny, grating, irritating, Jesus And Mary Chain-worshipping white noise. It really is quite delicious. Would you have guessed there was distortion on this album, though. Did not see that one coming at all. 14. Islands - Arm's Way Getting back the relative merit of such a best-of-list as previously discussed in #19, isn't it possible that all of these rankings, and I mean in particular the rankings of the lesser ranked albums 30 -11, would be better summarized without the restraints of a haphazardly spewed out number. I mean, really, what value is there in placing Islands' Arm's Way at #14 as opposed to, say, #19, or #27. Would anyone care? Would anyone in the world even notice? Come to think of it, is anyone reading this? Here you are, knowncutter, slaving away over a best-of-list you find mildly entertaining and there's a very probable chance that no one even reads this paragraph. If there anything like you, and I pray for their poor souls that they're not, the few that do read this will almost certainly just glance at the artists you have selected and determine for themselves whether or not you have decent taste or are, in fact, a worthless pile of dumb. In all likelihood, they will determine the latter, making your predicament all the more depressing. What do you get out of this? Don't try and answer. The answer is nothing. You get nothing at all. You enjoy writing this? Is that what I hear you mumbling? Dear lord, you're pathetic. Alone in your room with those lame-ass flannel pajama pants and no-shirt... and are those X-men boxers? We have a long way to go to get you laid, don't we? This won't be easy. 13. Cut Copy - In Ghost Colours A ridiculously fun, catchy record to dance to. Opening track, Feel the Love, might be my favorite song of the year and yet people probably would pick any of four or five other tracks as their personal favorites. This should give you some hint of the depth, and well-balanced joy spread over the course of this indie-pop - meets - the - best-aspects - of - techno - and - they - then - go - out - on -a - date-and -order -ice -cream -together -and -latter -wind -up -in -indie's -bed -with -no -clothing -on -and -no -protection -to -be -found -and -have -a -kid -named -cut-copy sound alike. I swear, that is exactly what it sounds like, too. If you don't believe me, have a listen. 12. Okkervil River - The Stand-Ins 2008 marks the year I fell in love with Okkervil River, and when I look back it's pretty easy to convince myself that it was because of this record. In reality, it was not (Black Sheep Boy should really take the honors) but that doesn't change the fact that The Stand-Ins is a terrific companion piece to the terrific The Stage Names. I realize I just said Feel the Love might be my favorite song of the year, but now that I'm here I'd like to correct that false statement. Lost Coastlines, off this record, is almost certainly the best song this year (featuring vocals from ex-Okkervil and current Shearwater main man Jonathan Meirberg. I mention this because that Shearwater record is also very solid, and since I just gave away that it would not be in my top ten, I'd like to apologize to any devout Shearwater fans and say I got it too late to really include it in the top thirty here. I hope we can still be friends. Maybe go get pizza sometime? Come back to my place and play some Mario Kart 64? You don't like pizza? How do you not like pizza? I don't think I've ever met anyone before who didn't like pizza. No, no, I'm not insulting you, I just... that's amazing. Pizza is so good. Ok, fine, you just don't like it. I'm totally cool with that, man. No, no, I don't want to pressure you into doing anything you don't want to do. You're right that's not cool. Nope, not at all. You want me to do what? Suck a whole bag of what? That's just obscene. I was just trying to be nice, man. See you in hell, too!) and Pop Lie comes very close. 11. Of Montreal - Skeletal Lamping I have to admit, I'm very, very sick of Kevin Barnes over-the-top desire to emulate David Bowie's effortless outrageous persona. It won't be long before Barnes is all over the blogosphere with videos of him, a female gorilla, one centaur (half-man, half horse), and a basilisk having a crazy orgy. And frankly, I just don't think I'm ready for that sort of video. Not sure it would even turn me on, really. Anyway, Skeletal Lamping is still a schizophrenic gem. I hesitate to call it a masterpiece because there's a ton wrong with it, but how Barnes managed to fit so much goodness into such a tiny space here (one album!) will always impress me. Stay tuned for albums 10 - 1 on my countdown of the best albums of 2008. There might even be a surprise contest in it for you if you do!  |
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