I'm Sorry if I Offended You. Can We Please Get Along?
Apr 25 '09
The Bottom Line It would be great if folks didn't base their prejudices on the way someone looks.
I don't know just how well this topic and opinion will be received, but it is bothering me.
I work with people of all races and ethnicities. Blacks, Orientals, Hispanics and maybe others that don't come to mind. At first, when I meet people, I am aware that their looks differ from the balance of my European based co-workers. The more I get to know them the more the color of their skin disappears. Sometimes I forget that a person is of a different race and I accidentally say something that offends them. I'm sorry. I forgot that you were Black, Hispanic, Oriental or whatever. I think I'm just talking to a person.
One example is I was looking for a co-worker's supervisor. I am bad with names and on a bad day, can't even remember my co-worker's names, as bad as that sounds. I asked this female co-worker, "Where's the boss-man?" She took offense to that and said it was a racist remark. Now this is a woman with whom I have a casual conversation now and then. She is far from stuck-up. I had NO IDEA that this was racist, since we all have bosses. I stood in awe as she explained this to me and I apologized.
A month or so ago, I was chatting with another co-worker. He was leaving before I was done helping him and light-heartedly asked, "Where you goin' boy?" This man is about 50 years old and a cool cat with an Afro, a good man, with whom I chat on a nearly daily basis. He is very laid back. He remarked, "Watch it," and left it at that. I had forgotten that he was black!
Why do people of a different ethnic group have to take offense when none is intended?
I am German. My father left Germany after the Civil War and before WW1. Call me a Kraut? I don't care. I even have a t-shirt with the word,"Kraut" that has the German flag on it. There are times when I feel that strangers of a different race look upon me as an emeny, when I haven't done anything to them.
I am an equal opportunity friend and have had best friends who are Black, Hispanic and Oriental. My grade school years were spent in a school that was 98% black and my high school years were spend in a neighborhood 98% Hispanic. I prefer to judge a person on their merits rather than their skin color or ethnicity. If you stab me in the back, I'd rather not be your friend. You treat me as your equal, and I'll do the same.
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