Why we chose to Homeschool
Jul 10 '00
I wanted to share my reasons for choosing to homeschool. Believe me, it wasn't a decision that I made quickly or that I took lightly. I researched homeschooling for many months. I spoke with parents that felt that homeschooling was the only way to educate their children and I spoke to parents that feel that children NEED to have the social interaction that they feel only a larger school setting can offer. I read everything on the subject that I could get my hands on. I read about the legal aspects of homeschooling. I read about the social implications of children being homeschooled rather then sent to the traditional school environment. I read about the different ways to homeschool, about different cirriculums, unschooling, everything. I spoke to my children's teachers and the principal, family members, and my children. It took me about 6 months before I made a decision.
Though all of my research I found nothing that alarmed me about the social wellbeing of my children, and I also felt very confident I could educate them myself. But what made me decide to homeschool wasn't any of these things in the end. My final decision stemed from watching how the public school delt with my son, who was abused at a daycare facility and was only removed from that situation a year ago this month! It was the lack of faith I now have in the public schools in my area. Let me tell you what happened to us.
The Past
I feel so that you can better understand my point of view here, I must share with you that my son was verbally abused for over a year by a daycare worker. He had to endure his teacher calling him names, putting him on timeout for having bowel movement accidents, being teased by the other children at the encouragement of the teacher. After finding this out, I, of course, removed him from this school. But being a single mother I had to work, so I placed him in a different daycare facility who's setup made me feel comfortable. It wasn't until then that he started to act out violently. He would throw chairs, stab other's with pencils, try to beat up a pregnant teacher's stomach. I quite my job to stay home with my son. He needed me.
Counseling Dissapointment
Before the school year started, I went to the school and told them about my son. He had special circumstances that I felt they needed to know about, especially since he was just going into kindergarten so they had no way of knowing about the abuse my son had endured or that he was well advanced educationally compared to their kindergarten criteria.
I spoke with the principal and notified her about my son's violent behavior, the past abuse, etc. She had told me that they would have him see the counselor they have on campus one day a week and they would request for the school district's psychologist to come and evaluate my son. Let's just say that he saw the psychologist one time the entire year. I was told after this first evaluation that they would start my son on a "plan" which involved not only the school officials but the parents. It would be to establish consistancy for him among other things like notating what behavior he had when. How he reacted to things, etc. All this was to be done, collected and then evaluated by the psychologist to determine how to best help my son's recovery. None of that ever happened although I called everyone including the superintendent of the school to try and get things happening.
To add to that, the counselor and psychologist never saw my son until half the school year was over. After my son saw the counselor two times, I tired to contact him, but never recieved a return call until the last month of school. I came to find out during this phone call that the school had never told the counselor about my son's past abuse! He had spent half a school year trying to figure out why my son behaved the way he did. They could have told him that. They all knew, the principal, the teacher, the office personnel!! No one bothered to tell this to the counselor! I can't express to you how dissapointed I was from all of this.
Educational Dissapointment
I also spoke to the principal before the school year started about how my son was obviously advanced compared to the things taught at the kindergarten level here. According to what they teach kindergarteners, he knew everything but how to read time. She told me that they would go ahead and start him at the kindergarten level and have his teacher evaluate him. That as long as he had mastered the things I said he had, he would be moved ahead to the 1st grade. The idea being that with him already having violent behavior, if they kept him in the kindergarten level when he already mastered all they teach at that grade, he would act out more from boredom. If they moved him ahead to the 1st grade level he would at least be kept intellectually stimulated, therefor less behavioral problems. His teacher did do the evaluation and found that he knew all he needed to know to be moved ahead, but she felt he should be kept in the kindergarten level BECAUSE of his social problems.
I confronted the principal about this, she told me that the final decision was up to his teacher. In the end, halfway through the school year this teacher left the school and my son got a new teacher. After only 2 days with my son, the new teacher confronted me and said that he is far beyond the other students and if I had considered moving him to the first grade level.
Both teachers ended up having alot of problems keeping my son entertained. He would be done with the work given him before the teacher was even done explaining to the class how to do the work. He would read directions himself and understand them well enough as to not have to wait for an explanation. With him finishing his work so quickly, they would have to figure things out to have him to just to keep him from getting bored and getting into trouble. He ended up doing exactly what the principal said would happen if he was kept in the kindergarten level.
Safety of the Students, Dissapointed again
During the school year the school my son attended had to be put under lock down 4 times. This is when they have all the students, teachers and staff locked up inside the classrooms, curtains drawn, all quiet. I don't know about other school's, but 4 times in one school year seems to be alot for an elementary school. They had several children caught bringing knives to school, and a couple brought drugs.
Because I live so far away from the school my son had to take the bus. The school is actually so far away, they pass 2 other elementary schools to get to their school. Common sense would say that they would go to the one nearest them, but nope. Anyway, the safety AT the school isn't the only safety problem, the bus situations are too.
The bus drivers are supposed to keep the youngest kids separate from the older kids where we live. Let me quickly mention that it takes 3 bus' to bring all the children from my neighborhood to the elementary school alone. There are enough children to warrent seperating the youngest from the oldest. The children are supposed to sit by grade, therefor you don't have the kindergarteners mixing with the 6th graders, SUPPOSED to. By the end of the school year they weren't keeping the children seperate anymore. My son ended up "hanging out" on the bus with 5th and 6th graders. Me, his mother, was not allowed to go on the bus to seat him. Although I told the bus driver he wasn't to sit with these older children, she let it happen anyway. My son would sit in the front where I told him to, yet these older children would make the younger kids my son was sitting with move so that they can sit by him. These older kids like how my son thought they were "soooo cool!!" It was a major problem between my son and myself. He would be punished by sitting with these children, but he still did.
I had no vehicle to drive him to school myself, the bus driver wouldn't keep them seperate, these children would constantly sit with my son, and I got no help from the school themselves. In the end, my son comes off the school one day to tell me that one of these children was calling him a little B#### along with many other choice words. On top of that this chid was hitting my son. I finally had it and called the school, and as you can imagine, used a few choice words myself. They did finally resolve the situation and started seperating the children again, but if they would have followed their own rules in the first place, my son would never had to have been exposed to that.
Conclusion
So, not only did the school dissapoint us at the counceling level, but also at the educational level, not to mention the administrative level and the safety level. By the end of the school year my son, a kindergartener, had been suspended from school 4 times, all for violent behavior. He had been beaten up on by a 6th grader. He had NOT gotten the proper counseling I had been promised. AND he hadn't been taught a thing educationally the entire year, well, he learned to tell time but I feel he should have learned more then that in a year.
My son had, however, earned the school's Outstanding Scholarship Award and has been refered to be tested for giftedness. He has taught himself almost everything needed to know to skip the 1st grade and move on to the second grade level... With no help from the school since they never gave us extra work to be sent home like I requested.
I will have to let you know how the homeschooling goes from here. We had our first day today, July 10th, 2000. He learned double digit adding today, although he does it as if he'd been doing it for years. I think I'll have my hands full.
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Epinions.com ID:
MommaLuv3
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Member: Kimberly
Location: California
Reviews written: 48
Trusted by: 37 members
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