The Elph, Jr. is the coolest, toughest, most excellent little camera ever. Here's why.

One day I was taking my trash to the trash chute at the end of the hall in my apartment building. I had my trash bag in one hand and a book in the other. Sitting on the book was my brand new Elph Jr., my PalmIII, a video, and my cell phone. Well, I was using that hand to open the trash chute door and the other to deposit the trash. This was all fine and good until everything sitting on the book started to topple into the trash chute (on the 9th floor), and before I could do anything about it, my chi-chi little camera and trusty PalmIII were banging their way down to the 3rd floor trash compactor.

At first I thought, "Hey, I'm sure they'll be just fine... sitting on top of a stack of nasty trash, but at least intact. I'll just hop down there and get it before someone sends more trash down the chute." So I closed the door and headed for the elevator, already plotting the lies I would need to convince my dinner date that I was legitimately delayed since I knew no one would believe what really happened.

And then I heard it: "rumrumrumrum...harummmmmmmmmm." As I was soon to learn, that's the sound of a pressure-sensitive, hydraulic trash compactor munching away on it's dinner. This was very, very bad.

I went downstairs and got the security guy to let me into the little trash room where this giant, orange monster was chained to the wall, locked down tight, and stinky, stinky, stinky. And about 5 minutes later, I also realized that the scary, dark, stinky trash room was illuminated by a light with a 5-minute timer. I spent the next 45 minutes running from the trash compactor to the light switch as I rummaged desperately for my fun toys.

Secretly, I didn't mind so much the loss of the PalmIII since the PalmV was so much cuter anyway, but I was quite intent on getting my new little camera back -- even if it involved digging through stinky trash, having my hands covered in chicken blood (which, BTW, I really did try to scrape off the light switch), old spaghetti sauce, and some sticky lubricant (the origin of which I will decline to consider).

Did I mention it was my birthday?

And then I found it: hopelessly crushed into the bottom of the trash compactor. I also found the cover of my PalmIII and one triple-A battery. Upon closer inspection, the Elph had a loose battery cover -- you can read my epinion on the usefulness of duct tape later -- and was otherwise, completely intact.

Since that fateful afternoon, I have developed the roll of film that was inside the camera at the time when it was crushed to find my pictures looking quite perky. I've also taken it on a trip or two, and most recently, I took it trekking with me up to Mt. Everest where it didn't have any problems with cold or altitude (both of which bothered ME a good deal), and you can see the proof at http://douglaspearce.com/photos/nepal .

The moral of the story: buy an Elph, buy a hardcase for your PalmPilot, and never carry anything of value with you when you take out the trash.



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