Attack of Cleavage (Review Featuring Adult Material)
Written: Mar 18 '00
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Product Rating:
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Pros: The Sheer Humour Of the Game Makes Up for Everything
Cons: Pretty Much Everything
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| Rocketgrl's Full Review: Dead Or Alive for PlayStation 1 |
Notice: This Epinion contains some adult material, though it is strictly an honest depiction of this game.
I only recently was introduced to the original version of Dead or Alive, on the clunky old Sega machine by a friend of mine. "You have to play this," he said, near dying of laughter at the time. "You'll love it." Dead or Alive (DOA), is probably one of the best games I have ever played in my entire life. It is almost like the Evil Dead of video games.
Dead or Alive was built by men, designed by men, and men who obviously weren't particularly experienced. In the original version, choosing a character ranges from several very unattractive males to Playboy females (the females have their own special outfits--string bikinis, bunny outfits, revealing cowboy outfits, etc. etc.). The females, while playing, have breasts that move almost like they're under water: and never stop moving. One of the most powerful moves in the entire game is one where it looks like the loser girl is giving oral sex to the winner girl. An original game that was such..."action packed" it was sheer comedy spurred me to purchase it's sequel for Playstation.
There are few *real* changes from the arcade DOA and the Sega original DOA to this Playstation version, but there are some noticeable differences. First of all, they get rid of that horribly distracting 3-D background and replace it with something 2-D and a bit more boring, but make up for it, as the characters look much smoother and more realistic and the lighting sources are actually quite impressive. These new characters are essentially the same and nothing non-stereotypical (save for the fact that one of the guys fights in a giant body condom with a sperm on his head). There is no character ending while there is a short character introduction, and they haven't even bothered to translate the speech out of Japanese. Again, there is an option to turn off the breast movement in the female characters: but it's not worth using. If you've bought this game, you're probably not in it for anything impressive that you are typically are buying games for.
The actual playing of DOA is probably the worst of any Playstation game out there. The music is positively annoying--almost elevator muzak mixed with J-Pop gets irritating on the ears, so break out the Eiffel 65, it would be much better than actually having to listen to the sound.
Like I said, the character speech is not translated out of Japanese. The games also end with simple "WIN" and "YOU LOSE". It's quite funny, it's a game that purely un-Americanized.
You'll like this game if you're a general Tekken or Street Fighter fan, but make sure you have a group of people to play this with who can laugh at it along with you. It's quite amusing with a two player, but in one player mode there's about a thousand and one different commands to commit to memory and the movements are much more clunky. If you're looking for a cheap laugh, get this game.
Parents should watch out if *any kid* in their household is purchasing it.
Recommended:
Yes
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Epinions.com ID:
Rocketgrl
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Member: Paul Laven
Location: PhilaDELpHia
Reviews written: 68
Trusted by: 32 members
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