There be MONSTERS in my house!
Oct 20 '00
My five year old daughter suffers from nightmares. For three years now she has awakened on average of three nights a week, sometimes only whimpering, sometimes sobbing, and many times screaming. The fear and panic in her eyes breaks my heart every single time.
I have no idea why she has these nightmares, although I have tried so hard to figure it out. She’s a very well-adjusted child, bright, lots of friends, active. She’s very bossy, but that’s why we call her “Little Mommy”…not that she got that from me! LOL! She and my son have the normal sibling rivalry going on, but nothing excessive, and they actually get along more often than not. So I am at a loss as to why this has been happening. I tend to think it’s because she has such a great imagination, and when she’s sleeping it just goes into overdrive….that trait she very well may have gotten from her mother!
On “nightmare nights” she tends to awaken at least four times….and nothing I have done has helped her. I have tried discussing the nightmares with her, but she never remembers them. I have tried distracting her by talking to her of pleasant things, or plans for the next day. That hasn’t worked either. I have tried laying down with her, but then I fall asleep with her and end up getting the brunt of her flailing arms and legs when the nightmare starts again. I have tried magic fairy dust, and “Mommy Magic” and everything else a parent can think of, and not one thing has worked.
When my nine year old was a toddler he had extremely bad nightmares (there were reasons for them, but it did not make dealing with them any easier, it only made the nightmares understandable). The one thing that made his nightmares go away (after the cause of them had been removed and the after effects dealt with), was a “Love Blanket” that I made him. I crocheted a blanket for him and put a tag on it that said “Made with Love by Mom”. He now never sleeps without it, and says that whenever he goes to bed he knows he is safe because he is covered with “Mom’s Love”. So I decided to try this with my daughter. She loves her blanket, but it still hasn’t made the nightmares go away.
So the nightmares continued, until two weeks ago. She was having a particularly bad night, and the entire house was awakened several times by her shrieking. By five o’clock in the morning I had finally had enough. I desperately needed sleep, and I was at the end of my rope. I had no idea what to do about the monsters in her room and I finally just told her “YES! There are monsters in the house! There are TWO of them!!!” That stopped her sobbing at once. She looked at me with fear in her eyes, but also with a touch of curiosity. I sat on her bed and with a smile told her there were two very, very big monsters in the house, and asked her if she knew what kind of monsters they were. Of course she didn’t and as I leaned in to whisper to her I told her “One of them is….the MOMMY monster!”….and the giggling ensued.
As I hugged her I asked her if she knew what the second monster was, to which she replied “The DADDY monster!” Well, since my husband was out of town, I had to tell her that no, when daddy is home there are THREE monsters in the house! Well, now she is really curious, and asks what the second monster is. Well, you probably guessed by now….it’s the TICKLE monster! Now she starts laughing and giggling and the tickling begins….she loves being tickled! She told me that the “good” monsters would never ever let the bad monsters hurt her. After I gave her a little tickle, she snuggled up in her blankets, gave me a kiss and hug, said goodnight, and went to sleep.
I know, you’re thinking she probably went to sleep from sheer exhaustion, and yes, I thought that too. But since that night she has not had a single nightmare. Maybe it’s because I validated her fear, and gave her a way to protect herself that worked for her. I certainly don’t think it would work for every child, but I am happy that it has had a positive effect on my daughter. I don’t know why it worked, and I won’t question it. It worked and that’s what matters. She no longer believes there are monsters in her room, and she is sleeping through the night. Now let’s hope it keeps working so I can catch up on some sleep, before the youngest starts with her nightmares!
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Member: Beverley
Location: Canada
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About Me:
So good to be home, but so very tired!
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