The First Year...what an learning experience
Sep 14 '00
In March of 2000 my husband and I celebrated our 1 year anniversary. We had made it through the first year. At the time it didn't seem like a big deal, but looking back a few months later I have noticed how things have ever so slightly changed since that first year has passed.
We were fortunate in that we never struggled with financial difficulties in our first year. My husband found a good job and made enough to provide for both of us, so I only have to work part-time for fun and some extra cash. I have heard many horror stories about couples who really had hard times during the first year or so. Thankfully we didn't have that issue. It did take some tie getting used to the budgeting of our money, which had to be done more carefully now than when we were both single. I handle all the bills and keep them organized which has worked out really well for us.
Marriage took a few months of getting used to. Just sharing our bed with another person every night was a struggle for both of us for a few weeks. (We still fight over the covers sometimes.) All of the sudden there was another person messing up my kitchen, getting the floors dirty, leaving shoes and clothes in the floor, and getting water all over the bathroom mirror. I have yet to figure out how he manages that, but he does. Small things, like slight annoyance when you just wanted to be alone for a little bit, took time to get adjust to. Suddenly it did matter what was for dinner because you were not feeding just yourself. Grocery shopping took a little bit of time to figure out. (My duty as well. Why is it that when men go to the store they come back with a ton of junk food?)
I think the hardest thing in our marriage was my husband's close relationship with his mother. Now I love his mother, she is wonderful, but when you get married there is a letting go of sorts, you leave your father and mother and cling to your spouse as the Bible puts it. That was the toughest part for him. His mother got in the way of a few arguments here and there, was the source of a lot of problems for a little while, all because he was not willing to push her out of his life to make room for me. Not that he had to totally abandon his mom, it's just that now he has a wife, and some of those things that Mom always did for him are now the wife's job. It helped a lot when we finally moved away from everyone and eventually he came to understand what I meant when I kept telling him that he was too much a Moma's boy.
We finally started to fit together better, things that used to cause friction we have now learned to overlook. We don't get annoyed with each other as often as we used to, nor do we pick at each other as much. Basically i guess you could just say we've grown, but instead of apart we have grown closer and learned more about one another. All in all it has been a wonderful experience and I look forward to many more years of learning and growing.
So if you are in your first year of marriage and are about ready to pull your hair out, sit back, take a deep breath and just wait a little bit longer. It will get better, I promise.
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Epinions.com ID:
bkaysimon
|
|
Location: Killeen, Texas, USA
Reviews written: 99
Trusted by: 40 members
|
|
|
© 1999-2009 Shopping.com, Inc.