SPANKING IS NOT AN OPTION


Aug 20, 2000




I do not spank. I was abused child--both mentally and physically and I will not put my child through what I went through. I was thrown against walls and ducked punches. I know that abusive parenting is learned and passed on because children that are hit will grow up to hit their own kids. I am afraid I will not know when to stop and then a spanking will turn into a beating.

So, what forms of discipline do I use?

I am a time out mom. My son gets a time out on his bed--no toys, no books. He just needs to lay there and think about his actions. If he asks to come out, he is in there longer. If I catch him playing--he is in there a lot longer.

I also am a believer of taking away of favorites. TV, music, video games, favorite toys--they all work well. I take them away(one item at a time) and explain he must earn them back. For example, if I tell him to clean his room and he doesn't, he looses Pokemon cards. He will not get them back until he cleans his room and keeps it clean for a few days.

For talking back, I do use soap in the mouth. I noticed that I only needed to do it once and the smart mouth stopped.

I am also a believer in positive reinforcement. If my son has a great week, we may go to McDonald's for dinner. He does not know about it a head of time--it is not a bribe. It is a little surprise to reinforce the good.

I realize that every parent will have their own ways of disciplining their child. For those who do not want to spank, I hope these suggestions help.


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