IS divorce an acceptable out?
Jul 17 '00
Yes, if you are being abused or are in danger. No, if you are going through a tough time. I wrote a review a while back on having a strong marriage, and now mine is suffering at it's worse. My husband is barely speaking to me and has decided we should try to separate. Do I agree with him? Partially, but not really. I agree we are not getting along. I agree we are unhappy. I agree things are not rosey right now. However, I do not agree with the escape he wants. I do not agree that we would be better parents apart. And, I do not agree that our children would benefit from it.
Now, granted, in the heat of the moment there is nothing I would like more than to be rid of him and all of his horrid habits. I'm sure he feels the same about me. But, once I calm down and think of the reality of the situation, is it really all that bad? Haven't we come this far through more trying times than this? Aren't three kids WORTH fighting for? I would hope that he would answer yes to these questions, but I really am not sure!
You know, when we entered into this marriage, it was for better or WORSE! So why, when it starts being worse, can we not remember the BETTER? Why do so many people just give up at this point? If you compare it to "in sickness and in health", would you just up and leave your dying spouse? Of course not! So, why, oh why, do we feel this tremendous need to give up when it comes to the worse?
I totally feel that families get so strained when the kids are young and finances may not be what we would like; but to end it all here? It honestly scares the hell out of me! My children would be devastated! They love both of us and would never be able to choose between us. My husband and I both would die to have to spend only a couple of days a week with our kids. I miss them now if I leave them for a few hours. It is just inconceivable to me. So, at what point you sacrifice your family for your temporary happiness? Not at this point, I'm afraid.
I am not abused. Neither of us has cheated. We don't lie to one another or steal from one another. We are a couple so caught up in life that we haven't slowed down long enough to really LISTEN to one another. That is no real reason for divorce, is it? I think no!
I say it's time to focus on one another and not the problems that have put us at this point. It is not to late to turn back and take back the hurtful words. Forgiveness may be hard, but I'm willing to take that job on! Thank you for reading, and please pray for my husband and myself. And, if you are going through something similar, don't give up so easily. Try to remember what attracted you to your spouse to begin with. Then, search and search until you find that person again! I promise you, your kids will thank you!
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Epinions.com ID:
jla928
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Reviews written: 75
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