BE NICE!
Sep 07 '00
Okay...SO the wedded bliss is over and it wasn't what you anticipated, so you've decided to break that sacred vow "Till death do you part". Now you've both gone your separate ways and the divorce is going through or is final. The problem now is the offspring you've created. Only one of you gets custody while the other gets shared or visitation rights
All to often I have heard parents talk to their kids about the other parent and 9 out of 10 times it isn't nice things they are saying.
First of all, There must have been something very special about the other parent or there wouldn't be a product of that relationship standing in front of you. Let your child form his/her own opinion about the other parent. Even if there is a great dislike between the two of you and maybe there are lots of people that agree with you, SO WHAT!!!! The child has every right to LOVE that person and has the right to tell you so even if you don't want to hear it. They don't want to know or may not even care why Mommy and Daddy hate each other. They are just excited that they are finally getting time to spend with the other person. If your child is happy about this then you have no right to take that away from them.
Another thing I've heard is one parent pumping their child full of question about the other parent. Do you really think that is fair? If you REALLY need to know then call them yourself! Mind you, they don't have to answer but don't expect your child to answer or even know the answer. This will make the child resent you sooner or later. Besides, that part of your life is over. You adults made that decision, not the child. The child is the one in the middle of this mess and has to be able to cope. He/She didn't ask to brought into this world, all they want is to be loved by both parents.
Besides....with so much resentment between the two of you, how do you expect the lines of communication to be open? You really do need to be able to communicate in a civilized manner for the sake of the child. He/She needs you both!
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Epinions.com ID:
Misticke
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Member: Debbie McPhail
Location: Ocala, Fla
Reviews written: 142
Trusted by: 37 members
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