I am seeing way too many positive opinions about Eminem.
Written: Apr 05 '00 (Updated Apr 25 '00)
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Product Rating:
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Pros: He made fun of Marilyn Manson.
Cons: He's an annoying pest that you can't get rid of.
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| rebelgrrl's Full Review: Eminem |
When I first saw the video for Slim Shady, I thought "Oh, how cute, a little parody video. Everybody likes it, but let's see what his music is really like." Boy was I surprised. Every single song on every single CD features this kid's annoying voice.
Made for Empty-V, Eminem has put forth singles that sound the same over and over again. Pairing Eminem with Dr. Dre is like pairing Shania Twain with Courtney Love. You hope the latter beats the poo out of the former. (Sorry Shania fans) (And yes, I said poo) I simply don't understand how a little guy like Eminem, who has no talent whatsoever, can rap with one of the most old-school rappers ever. Eminem is now all over girly magazine covers, and quite frankly, I don't understand that either.
You can always recognize an Eminem song by his whiny, annoying voice, which must be an acquired taste. Also, it's been my experience that all the songs sound the same, except for the choruses. His smart@ss attitude shines through every song, and at times it seems that he's even patronizing the listener for listening to him.
Eminem is the epitome of a sell out. His songs are pointless and shallow; he sings about nothing but violence and sex, and he doesn't even do that well. His attitude has lately been a major problem. Plenty of artists in the music business have made their frustration about Eminem public. For instance, the Insane Clown Posse has a much downloaded parody of Eminem's "Slim Shady" called "Slim Anus." If you dislike Eminem as much as I do, and you haven't heard it, I would suggest that you do. [Hi kids, do you like anus?]
Lately a lot of people have been posting comments pointing out that I'm missing the fact that Eminem is a talented lyricist; a great freestyler. I hate most rap, but I do have respect for artists who can successfully freestyle without sounding like idiots. Eminem, however, cannot. I've already posted some of his lyrics in the comments section, but apparently that wasn't enough to show people what a horrible "artist" Eminem is.
I searched high and low for an Eminem song that might even be a little bit good, but came up empty. I can't believe you people like this utter and total garbage. There's no point; it's the most shallow content I've ever read. For god sake's people, even The Bloodhound Gang has something to say in their songs! I'd compare the content of Eminem lyrics with the content of.....hmmm....Weird Al Yankovic. Only not as organized. And maybe it's just me, but he seems to sing about his mom a lot.
I'll let the amazing lyricist speak for himself. As you can see from these tidbits of songs, these words are pure works of art. Pay close attention to the way that he doesn't ramble and the way his rhymes seem to come together to make musical masterpieces. If you want to see more, see the comments section. Don't read on if you're easily offended.
"Got pi$sed off and ripped Pamela Lee's t*ts off
And smacked her so hard I knocked her clothes backwards like Kris Kross
I smoke a fat pound of grass and fall on my ass
faster than a fat bi+ch who sat down too fast"
"Got bitches on my jock out in East Detroit
Cause they think that I'm a motherfu[kin Beastie Boy {*wolf whistle*}
So I told em I was Mike D
They was like, "Gee I don't know, he might be!"
I told em, 'Meet me at Kid Rock's next concert
I'll be standin by the Loch Ness Monster (okay) peace out (bye!!)'"
"Cuz this is what happens when Bad Meets Evil
We hit the trees till we look like Vietnamese people
He's Evil, and I'm Bad like Steve Segal
Above the Law cuz I don't agree wit police either (sh*t, me neither)
We ain't eager to be legal
So please leave me wit the keys to your Jeep Eagle
I breathe ether in three amounts
When I stab myself in the knee with a diseased needle"
"She beat me over the head with the remote control
opened a hole, and my whole brain fell out of my skull
I picked it up and screamed, "Look bi+ch, what have you done?!?"
[M] "Oh my God, I'm sorry son"
[E] "Shut up you cun+!" I said, "Fu[k it!"
Took it and stuck it back up in my head
then I sewed it shut and put a couple of screws in my neck"
"Nobody better test me, cuz I don't wanna get messy
Especially when I step inside this bi+ch, di[k freshly
New Lugz, give the crew hugs, guzzle two mugs
Before I do drugs that make me throw up like flu bugs
True thugs, rugged unshaven messy scrubs"
I have said my piece. I recommend Eminem to anyone who watches TRL on MTV, anyone who loves boy bands, and anyone who loves skinny little wannabe rappers.
Recommended:
No
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Epinions.com ID: rebelgrrl
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Member: Melody Addington
Reviews written: 36
Trusted by: 19 members
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