Bye Baby Bunting, Dragon's Gone A'Hunting
Jan 02 '01 (Updated Jun 10 '02)
The Bottom Line If you're gonna kill it, you better plan on eating it!
Hunting, this is a touchy subject in this neck of the woods. Most folks are either for it or agin it and there are not too many that fall in the gray area of “mebbe yes, mebbe no, it all depends.” Naturally, never one to hang with the majority or embrace the popular sentiment, the Chief Dragon in Residence has her very own take on the subject.
ROAST CRITTER, ANYONE?
If there is one hard and fast rule around the Dragon Weyr, it is this: Kill it and you had better plan on eating it! There are very few exceptions to this rule. The one that pops immediately to mind is rabid animals, they are exempt. Dragons and friends of dragons do not eat rabid animals. When a rabid creature is destroyed its remains are given a decent burial.
When it comes to shooting food, there are a few truly fine creatures that are well worth the effort of stalking, shooting, and dressing. Among this group would be Canada geese, grouse, and squirrel. Deer are tasty, but not always in top condition for the table. Bear are in short supply in the neighborhood, and wild turkeys are not very different from the supermarket variety.
HUNTING MORALITY
Many of you may think the juxtaposition of these two words creates an oxymoron. However, this is not so. In order for hunting to be acceptable on any level, it must be accompanied by a strict moral code.
The CDR’s code is as follows:
1. You kill it, you eat it.
2. Don’t kill it if you only want to display part of its anatomy as a trophy
3. Don’t kill it if it is not acceptable “food”
4. Don’t kill it just for fun
5. Don’t kill it because you are annoyed and having a bad hair day
6. Don’t kill it unless there are lots to take its place
1. You Kill it, you eat it This rule should be pretty self-explanatory. In includes the caveat that you should also know how to dress the carcass and prepare it for the table. There is no excuse for killing a healthy living thing if you are not planning a meal around it.
2. Don’t kill it if you only want to display part of its anatomy as a trophy. Never, never, never drag home a twelve-point rack or string of bear claws without the original owner attached and being prepared for the freezer. Such behavior will get you an instant flaming and your hunting rights on Weyr land will be permanently rescinded for all time. Dragons do not kill for trophies, not ever, no exceptions. It is permissible to keep a particularly nice rack or other part of a creature but only if the rest of the creature resides in the freezer in neatly wrapped roasts and steaks. Body mounts are also forbidden, as the entire animal must be sent to the taxidermist and the meat is often wasted.
3. Don’t kill it if it is not acceptable “food” Food is many things to many people. Around the Weyr, it means we don’t shoot crows, snakes, vultures, foxes, or anything else that is considered inedible. Exempt from this rule are all rabid animals (which must be destroyed for the common good), varmints that are killing livestock, and anyone with a really bad attitude who insists on trespassing after repeated warnings.
4. Don’t kill it just for fun. This should be self-explanatory, however, there are those who think it ok to shoot at starlings or barn swallows just for the heck of it. They are referred to rules 1 and 3. Killing for fun is just plain wrong. Persons persisting in this sort of sick and deeply disturbed behavior are donated to the local hunt clubs to be used for target practice.
5. Don’t kill it because you are annoyed and having a bad hair day. Hunting for food is serious business. It is never permissible to go about with a loaded weapon when in a bad mood. This is how tragic accidents happen, everything from accidentally shooting off a favorite appendage to mistakenly offing a friendly cat, sheep, cow, or neighbor. Loaded guns and anger don’t mix.
6. Don’t kill it unless there are lots to take its place. When the Chief Dragon in Residence says lots, she means LOTS. There is no excuse for killing anything for food unless it has many brothers, sisters, cousins, aunts, and uncles also running around. Food Lion was still full of food last time she looked and Kroger’s, Winn-Dixie, Super Wal-Mart, and the IGA are also well stocked. Granted, in the Weyr environs there are not many animals suitable for food that are at risk of extinction, but you never know when a passenger pigeon will fly up out of the woods. Know your critters and never kill one if you are unsure of its identity.
MAN’S ROLE IN THE BALANCE OF NATURE
Ever since Homo sapiens started killing live creatures for food he has been actively mucking about with the balance of nature. Up until fairly recently, man’s role in the dance of life has been in sync with the natural order of things. Man lives at the top of the food chain, sharing that lofty pinnacle with the other large predators, i.e., lions, tigers, bears, leopards, and wolverines, to name but a few. While sometimes a prey animal himself, with the advent of various technological marvels, starting with the crossbow and culminating in the Uzi, man has managed to pretty much take over as chief predator.
Recent anthropological findings, however, show that stone-age humans did a pretty good job of ridding the planet of nearly all the large mammals. New World horses and camels are just two of their victims and all with only stone axes, flint arrowheads, and fire-sharpened sticks. Truly, man is a formidable predator!
In achieving this dubious honor, he has also wiped out most of the competition. The result of this orgy of killing is the current unhappy state of affairs. In many parts of the world prey animals are so abundant that they are unable to find sufficient food. This means that many die during hard winters and others invade human habitats, eating crops and gardens. Huge numbers of deer are struck by autos every year, sometimes resulting in the death of driver and passengers.
Other, smaller prey animals, such as mice, rabbits, squirrels, and various game birds are also exceeding the carrying capacity of their environments. In some areas domestic cats are filling the role left vacant by foxes and bob cats, but the CDR would not want to meet the domestic kitty cat capable of taking down even a very young and sickly deer.
Man has created this mess and it therefore falls on his shoulders to correct it as nearly as possible. As the restoration of large natural predators to heavily populated suburban areas (mainly along the densely urban east coast) is considered risky to human life and limb (and not too healthy for the predators, either), it becomes necessary for man to harvest the excess numbers of prey animals during controlled hunting seasons. When the numbers of animals living in a given area is in balance with the available food, things work pretty much as they should. Forests and meadows are not over-browsed and there is usually sufficient food to go around.
THE DRAGON HUMBLY SUGGESTS
Everyone who enjoys stalking and killing wild creatures should embrace some sort of code of conduct that reflects a sanctity for life. This means that trophy hunting should be discouraged by anyone striving for a higher plane of existence. Killing only for food, always eating what one does kill, and leaving natural predators alone to do their job should form the nucleus of this code.
Supporting local wildlife enforcement agents in the efficient pursuit of their jobs should also be encouraged. Poachers are usually not concerned with any sort of hunting morality, only with killing for profit. Be it the sale of trophy heads or black-market meat, they are operating outside the law and often take protected animals. Especially pernicious are those who kill only for a few valuable parts and leave the rest of the animal to rot.
Hunting is not for everyone. However it is a pastime that man has come by naturally. Those who enjoy this sport and practice it responsibly should not be harassed by others who find it unpleasant or reprehensible. There is room on this planet for those who hunt and those who have no wish to do so.
© 2001 Pamela Matlack, All Rights Reserved.
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Member: Pamela Matlack Klein
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