“Kindness is a revolution whose time has come!” - A Short Course in Kindness
Written: Feb 27 '03 (Updated Feb 27 '03)
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Product Rating:
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Pros: Inspirational, Insightful, Well-Written
Cons: None
The Bottom Line: I was touched by the content in A Short Course in Kindness it is likely you will be too.
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| Lisa_J's Full Review: A Short Course in Kindness Books |
Within the pages of A Short Course in Kindness, Margot Silk Forrest combines honesty, experience, and expertise, to provide stories, personal testimonies, and quotations that melt together, allowing for a smooth flow in this well-written book. I was touched by the content, it is likely you will be too.
Reviewer Insight
Approximately seven months ago, multiple outside influences, personal health issues, and mere happenstance, began to take a toll on me. My normally positive demeanor was suffering. I was allowing acts of unkindness, from others, to penetrate my thought processes. My body was experiencing excessive pain, exhaustion, and partial disabilities, due to frustrating twists with chronic illnesses. Unemployed from Boeing, my husband was jumping through hoops to ensure schooling needed for a career change. Caught within a web of situations beyond my control, I was slowly losing grasp of the ability to filter the negative effects of unkind words/acts from others.
By sharing personal information with you, I hope that I have set foundation toward understanding the season of life that I am exiting, and prepare for explanation of a tool that assisted me immensely. This tool arrived in the form of a book, A Short Course in Kindness, by Author Margot Silk Forrest. Lessons within the pages of this book assisted me toward understanding what happened to me, and provided crucial insight toward rebuking future negative invasions. Even more importantly, it reminded me of the need to extend frequent acts of kindness.
Timely Arrival
Months back, when Bridgette (redlass) inquired with me regarding a possibility of reviewing A Short Course in Kindness, I expressed interest. Time passed. This book arrived on a Friday in which we were going out of town, for a dance competition; I packed it. I am not sure when the book actually should have landed in my mailbox, but the timing couldn't have been better. Being of Christian faith, I find a gratifying connection between the arrival time of this book, and the need in which I had for this tool. That evening, as late as it was, after tucking the children into bed, I began the initial read. I wasn’t properly prepared for the showering of tears that would flow. These tears were ones of sorrow – for a season laced with internal misery, and ones of joy – for lessons learned, remarkable stories digested, and of hope for the future. Over the course of the weekend, crying, laughing, and rejoicing, I completed the first read and reread various pages.
***Prior to proceeding I do want to say, that it is my opinion, you needn’t have Christian beliefs or faith in order to enjoy this book.***
I am grateful for this Short Course in Kindness, feel that it has blessed me, and highly recommend obtaining a copy of the book. Also, I would suggest consideration of this book for gift giving purposes.
The contents massaged my heart, soul, and being, applying life to dry areas. Like a dry sponge that soaks up water, I soaked up the beneficial offerings, and I have completely read this book two times. In addition, I have underlined sentences, highlighted key points, adhered sticky notes to certain pages, and completed four sketch journal pages with regard to the contents. Obviously this book isn’t the sole reason for my ability to ‘find me’ again, but it played a crucial role.
It is not normal for me to comment with regard to the book cover. However, I honestly feel that it is noteworthy.
When I pulled A Short Course in Kindness out from the mail packaging, I was immediately impressed with the cover. Both front and rear cover, offer a durable flap that double as bookmarks. In addition, the coloring is subtle, yet complimentary.
Book Details
With an endorsement for and words providing inspirational empowerment to Pay It Forward, A Short Course in Kindness allows readers to grasp the importance of extending kindness. Immediately, I gleaned confirmations, insight, and some worthy lessons with regard to the necessity of kindness, the ill effects of unkindness, and I was emotionally moved. Reference to the Pay It Forward concept is made, and Catherine Ryan Hyde penned the foreword. Catherine talks about her personal belief that “We are born optimistic and altruistic. I used to believe it was pounded out of us at a certain age, that it died in the difficult process of growing up. I don’t believe that anymore…… Now what I believe is this: In the process of growing to adulthood, we make choices about what we’ll show others and what we will hide. If it feels too dangerous to put some part of ourselves on display, we put it away where others can’t use it to hurt us.” She encourages to realize that acts of kindness inspire others, that they begin a chain of positive change, and that these acts will allow us to witness changes in the world. We are encouraged to comprehend that our words are powerful, offering a tool for change. This foreword provides a complementary foundation for the content that follows.
Content of A Short Course in Kindness maintains a principal message - “Kindness is a revolution whose time has come!” and provides Five Principle Truths:
---- “Kindness brings us into the full use of our personal power.”
---- “Our ability to give and receive kindness depends on the kindness we hold for ourselves.”
---- “There is a crucial difference between being nice and being kind: One increases stress, the other reduces it.”
---- “Kindness is love, pure, and simple.”
---- “One of the shortest paths to self-discovery is the conscious practice of kindness.”
Margot Silk Forrest explains the chilling results of unkindness. “Nothing teaches us so much about the importance of kindness as the lack of it.” She provides true stories and eyewitness account, supportive of points made throughout the book. Marilyn VanDerbur is quoted with regard to mention of the fact that one drop of red paint, put into white paint, the result, and how it mirrors the manner in which we are affected by kindness and unkindness.
Kindness, the word, is defined, and relationship of it to the fact that we should “Treat everyone as kin. As family. As blood relatives.” We are kin! Explains Margot Silk Forrest. At this point, although I was merely in chapter 2, I was mesmerized. Does that sound unbelievable? Lets step back for a moment and take another look at the season of time I was attempting to exit. After a long period of feeling lost, realization had set in, with regard to the elements of ‘me’ that were severely hindered, or missing. Those that are close to me know that I normally maintain a positive spirit, maintain mutual friendships with people from various faith systems/lifestyles, and that I used to adore life. Although I was making excellent strives toward exiting a time of anxiety; rebuking attacks from mean-spirited people, and re-igniting my love for life & people, the words from this book offered additional empowerment.
Amidst the text, there are personal tales from the author, allowing you to feel connected. Some of these actually evoked a laugh; the wording was such that I could visualize the situation(s). Within a particular tale, I realized the difference between being nice versus being kind. This was a welcomed discovery, one that literally caused me to rethink certain commitments and expectations. Additionally, I have revisited communication style with children and others around me. As Author Margot Silk Forrest stated, “There is a crucial difference between being nice and being kind: One increases stress, the other reduces it.” Captivation of merely this principal, offers strong enough reason to purchase this book.
One could argue that I had appropriate reasons for allowing myself to enter a season of despair; clearly I was thrown unkindness by select few, chronic illness took a toll, and life happenings offered many slaps. But to hold onto these, I would be literally entering into a victim mentality. And, although I was clearly victimized with harsh actions of others, the fact remains that there will always be some individuals, that cross our paths, and inflict unkindness. If we allow the unkind acts of others to outweigh the kind acts; we are robbing ourselves, and possibly allowing the 'enemies of kindness' to overtake. The author lists suspected enemies of kindness, “time, anger, pain, hatred, selfishness, self-importance, cynicism, stress, exhaustion, apathy, distrust, denial, risk aversion, pessimism, loss of faith, disdain, self-hatred, shame, and unconsciousness.”
The important role that empathy plays toward kindness is explored, via a heartfelt, true story. This was one of the most touching stories contained in A Short Course in Kindness. The story tells about two people, sitting in a hospital cafeteria, late one evening. The main characters are a young man, whose Mother is in a coma, entering the third week of unresponsiveness, a woman, whose sister-in-law has exited surgery due to brain tumors, and a Great Dane named Milo. Initially the woman – Katy – attempted to ignore the young man, but followed an internal instinct to converse. This story provides a visual of kindness in action, and the results of this encounter are miraculous. I cried, yet rejoiced in the fact that ‘timing’ is to be celebrated. In addition, I realized – a confirming need – to join a support group for the chronic illnesses I deal with (MS & Fibromyalgia).
Margot Silk Forrest states, “Kindness has the capacity to turn the powerless into the empowered.” She talks about the unfortunate misuse of power, but reminds us that acts of kindness show us the power that we have. This isn’t to be confused with the person who appears nice, saying and doing ‘nice’ appearing gestures, in order to attain or maintain positions of power. How many times have you been handed a ‘nice’ appearing gesture from a person within power, but realized her/his heart intent wasn’t pure. Personally, I would rather be on the receiving end of kindness versus a ‘nice’ façade. “Kindness brings us into the full use of our personal power.”
In Regards to Igniting A Kindness Revolution, Ten Tactics Are Mentioned:
“Small Acts Can Have Big Effects”
“Be Guided By the Better-Than-Golden Rule”
“Listen, Listen, Listen (And Occasionally Ask Questions)”
“Accept the Kindness of Others”
“Talk About the Hard Stuff”
“When Action Is Called For, Act”
“Offer Companionship Is Whatever Form Is Needed”
“Encourage Laughter”
“Be Encouraging”
“Be Kind To Yourself”
Other elements shared within this publication include realization that kindness is optional, and that it (kindness) helps us to realize our self-worth. There are examples of the courage needed to be kind, and explanations of why courage is important. A key point made is with regard to times in which fear must not hinder us from doing the right thing. We are reminded to be kind to ourselves, guided toward extending grace, and encouraged to pass along our gifts. In closing, Author Margot Silk Forrest speaks about the importance of change, explaining that each person can accomplish a ton.
“One person is a lot.”
Change, like kindness, is contagious.”
Additional Personal Reflection
Just as Author Margot Silk Forrest hoped, I was touched by the stories (all of them true) within A Short Course in Kindness, and the content motivated me to “Tap into my reserves of kindness!” I pledge to revisit the season of time, in which performing spontaneous acts of kindness wasn’t hindered by an overactive internal guard. I am unable to choose how others treat me, but I do need to take ownership of how I allow it to affect me.
Simply speaking, there are mean spirited people, who marvel in causing misery to others. They sit in the corners of their life, scheming to knock others out, due to jealousy, envy, or other negative fuel. Although I cannot change the manner in which others treat me, it doesn’t have to extinguish my positive demeanor. In addition, perhaps with increased extensions of kindness, the contagion aspects will eventually reach the hearts of those whom act mean.
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A Short Course in Kindness
Author: Margot Silk Forrest
Table of Contents
Foreword
Introduction
Chapter 1 - You Can Catch It in the Best of Company
Chapter 2 - We Are Kin
Chapter 3 - What Kindness Is--and Isn’t
Chapter 4 - The Enemies of Kindness
Chapter 5 - It All Starts With Empathy
Chapter 6 - Who Am I, Anyway?
Chapter 7 - Where Courage Comes In
Chapter 8 - We Act, Therefore We Are
Chapter 9 - The Connection Between Kindness
and Power
Chapter 10 - Don’t Forget to be Kind to Yourself
Chapter 11 - God’s Designated Driver
Chapter 12 - Strategies and Tactics for the
Kindness Revolution
Chapter 13 - Changing the World
Now Tell Me Your Stories
Index
Acknowledgments
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As mentioned earlier, I highly recommend A Short Course in Kindness, and I have benefited immensely from the content. I extend a compliment to Author Margot Silk Forrest with regard to her ability to present a publication that is likely to inspire many. And, I encourage you to learn more about this inspirational author by visiting:
http://www.margotsilkforrest.com/
© 2003 Lisa_J
Recommended:
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Location: Pacific Northwest - Washington State
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Rest in Peace Barbara, you are missed.....
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